Anchored
by Rebecca L. Smith
Summary: Summary inside. Update 03/29/11: Two years have passed since Adalei and Alix left the Empire. Much has changed between the women, but not nearly as much as what's changed between Xena and Gabrielle.
1. I

_**A/N:** This fic is set in early season 4. A good reference spot would be right after the episode, "In Sickness and in Hell." I want all the Xena and Gabrielle history to be there, without getting into the crucifixion prophecy plot line. Essentially, the idea of the story is this: Xena and Gabrielle's relationship has always been a bit unclear, especially on the question of are they just friends or is it something more? As all Xena fans know, more often than not, there is subtext and on occasion it appears to be maintext. However, both women tactfully dance around the very question itself, never fully confronting it head on, regardless of speculation. So, what happens when Xena and Gabrielle's ambivalent behaviors are blatantly challenged? An unexpected journey with an open couple unearths secrets that both women have been hiding, causing frustration and distress specifically for Gabrielle. No more ambiguity; it's bold straightforwardness from now on. _

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**Anchored**

**I**

"Xena, will you please slow down?" Gabrielle begged as she scaled up the hillside, desperately trying to keep up with her friend. "I can't climb as quickly as Argo." She added in a tone that reflected her aggravation.

Xena slowed down and turned Argo around, eventually circling Gabrielle and coming up behind her as she was trudging up the hillside. When Xena was close enough, she swooped down, captured the bard, and pulled her up onto the horse. On the rare occasion that Gabrielle would ride with Xena, she always took her place behind the warrior, but this time Xena seated the younger woman securely in front of her. Gabrielle began to object to such treatment at first, taking this action to mean Xena had grown frustrated with Gabrielle not being able to keep up, but then realizing the intimate position of Xena's arms engulfing her as they continued to ride, she remained silent.

"We're close to Athens." Xena barely spoke above a whisper; her breath faintly brushed across Gabrielle's neck causing a chill to race through the younger woman's body. Usually, if Xena mentioned anything while they rode together, Gabrielle would never be able to hear unless Xena turned her head and said it loudly over her shoulder, and that certainly didn't produce the same effect.

Unable to resist a smile, Gabrielle titled her head slightly and looked up Xena, "We should ride this way more often. It's convenient… and comfortable." She added. "Without you in front of me, I can actually see where we're going."

Xena let a smile sneak onto her lips as well, "I suppose it is convenient." She agreed, pressing Argo on up the hillside. "The sun will be going down soon, but we should make it into the city by night; perhaps a little after."

"Good." Gabrielle concluded, "I'm exhausted."

As the two women reached the top of the hill, Gabrielle gasped at the sight of Athens off into the distance. The setting sun painted the city in a gorgeous glow of orange and red. "Xena, look how beautiful."

"I find more beauty in nature than in any city." Xena replied, though she paused long enough for them both to get a good look before continuing down the other side of the hill.

Gabrielle laughed lightly, "Yes, I know. You hate cities."

"Cities are too loud and…" Xena continued.

"Too crowded." Both women said in unison.

Gabrielle laughed again, "Sorry. You've just said it so many times."

Xena smirked, but didn't reply. Keeping both hands on the reins, and both arms securely around Gabrielle, Xena gently kicked Argo into a swift trot, in hopes of getting to Athens not too long after nightfall. Gabrielle leaned back and relaxed herself against Xena. Xena stiffened to support her weight. Content, Gabrielle closed her eyes and felt the steady rhythm of Argo's pace. It wasn't much longer before they arrived at the gates of Athens, but Gabrielle had nodded off by then.

"Gabrielle, we're here." Xena spoke softly into the woman's ear. Gabrielle mumbled a few incoherent words, and then turned and cuddled closer into Xena. "Gabrielle… wake up." Xena instructed, nudging her friend.

Gabrielle's eyes fluttered open and she looked around sleepily, "Wha-" She paused, "I fell asleep." She realized, though a bit confused.

Xena smiled, "Only for a bit." Xena jumped off her horse, and helped Gabrielle down as well. "There's a tavern just inside the gates; we can stay there."

Gabrielle yawned and followed behind Xena. They walked into the tavern and were welcomed warmly by the owner.

"Hello! Welcome to Priam's Tavern. I'm Priam. May I Interest you in food? A room? Food and a room?"

"Just a room for now…" Xena replied, "and a stable for my horse."

"Right away!" Priam replied. "I'll give you the best room I have available."

"We'll take the cheapest." Xena interjected.

"Of course, the cheapest, best room that I have." Priam's face lit up. "Right this way!" Priam led the women outside, through the stables, and into his spare rooms at the back of his property. "Here." He announced, "Plenty of hay for your horse and your room will be right in there." He pointed. "Good?"

"This is fine, thank you." Xena replied, paying the man a few dinars.

"How long will you be staying?" Priam asked eagerly.

"A couple of nights at least. If we decide to stay longer, may we rent the room for a few more days?" Gabrielle asked.

"Of course!" Priam exclaimed with joy. "Please, stay as long as you wish!" Priam patted each woman on the back, "You're good customers." He smiled as he walked away counting his dinars.

"He's very happy to see us." Gabrielle noted. "I'm guessing he doesn't get many customers."

Xena looked around, "The place is a bit run down, but it's great for people like us, eh?"

Gabrielle smiled, "You mean the kind of people who are used to sleeping on the ground?"

"Yeah." Xena replied nodding her head, "Those kind." She began brushing down Argo and unloading their packs.

Gabrielle opened the door and walked inside the small, but quaint, room. She lit a candle and helped Xena unload the packs. Within a few minutes the women were settled down for the night. "I honestly don't recall the last time I was this tired." Gabrielle replied, rubbing her neck as she sat down on the bed. "I feel like I haven't slept in days."

"Well, now you can enjoy some rest in an actual bed for a few nights." Xena smiled, "Instead of falling asleep sitting straight up on Argo." She added jokingly.

Gabrielle chuckled lightly, "Hey, it's not like I frequently fall asleep while riding horses. Usually, I'm hanging on for my life back there. It's different sitting in the front; it's much easier to relax. Plus, you don't make such a bad pillow, you know. Just have to watch out for that breast plate."

Xena had stripped down to only her slip. She walked over to the bowl of water sitting by the door and washed her hands and face. Gabrielle changed into her nightclothes as well, and then used the water bowl after Xena had finished. Xena folded down the blankets and blew out the candle. Once the two women had settled down under the covers, Xena closed her eyes expecting that they both would fall asleep quickly.

"Xena?" Gabrielle's sleepy voice called out.

"Hmm?" Xena replied, keeping her eyes closed.

"After we purchase supplies in the market tomorrow, can we go to a poetry reading?" Xena didn't immediately reply. "Please?" Gabrielle continued, "I haven't been to one in ages."

"You can go, Gabrielle." Xena finally answered, "I'll meet up with you afterwards."

Gabrielle leaned up on her side, facing the warrior, "I'd like for you to come with me. I think you'd be surprised. You may even like it."

Xena's eyes opened and focused on Gabrielle, "I doubt it."

"Okay, so maybe you won't like it." Gabrielle admitted, "But that doesn't mean you will hate it. Perhaps you could just… tolerate it?"

"Or, I could avoid it." Xena concluded.

"Come on, Xena. I don't want to go alone." Gabrielle's eyes saddened, as she begged. "Please, come with me? Please?"

Caving in, Xena sighed, "All right. I'll go, but I'm not staying the entire afternoon." Xena warned.

"Deal." Gabrielle replied happily. Now content, she lay back down in the bed and closed her eyes.

Xena glanced over at the younger woman who was still slightly smiling, "Goodnight, Gabrielle." she whispered.

"Goodnight." Gabrielle repeated softly. She reached over and took Xena's hand in her own. Within minutes, she had fallen asleep. Xena followed soon after.

The next morning came quickly. It was no secret that Xena never slept well in cities. As soon as the streets became crowded and noisy, she woke immediately. Her eyes opened to reveal Gabrielle who was still sleeping pleasantly, her hand, even now, interlocked in Xena's. Xena lay there for a moment, reluctant to break the peacefulness between them, but then a knock at the door caused Gabrielle to stir, releasing Xena's hand as she sat up in bed.

"I'll see who it is." Xena replied, rising to her feet, "It's probably Priam."

"If he's offering breakfast, I'll take it." Gabrielle yawned and wiped at her eyes.

Xena initially opened the door only enough to peek out, but instantly opened it wider when she saw who was standing on the other side.

"Xena..." The woman wearily replied. "I need your help."


	2. II

_A/N: Just a heads up that there will be some references made to the episode titled, "The Deliverer." You may recall that Xena was in the middle of teaming up with Boudica to take on Caesar, but then she flees off to the temple to save Gabrielle from Krafhstar… err, the demon sent by Dahawk. Also, I'd like to point out that historically, Boudica battled against Gaius Suetonius Paulinus, a general under the command of Nero, but for the sake of Xena coherency, we'll go with Caesar._

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**Anchored**

**II**

"Alixandriah…" Xena moved quickly out of the doorway, allowing room for the woman to enter. Alix quickly stepped inside, and Xena shut the door behind her. Gabrielle never moved from the bed, but kept a very close eye on the strange new woman standing in their room, who already seemed to have a history with Xena.

"I heard you were in the city; I've looked all night for you." Alixandriah sighed heavily. "You have to help me."

"Help with what?" Xena asked anxiously, "What's happened?"

Alixandriah lowered her head and looked away from the warrior; she muttered a name barely loud enough to be heard, though its sound pierced the ears like the tip of an arrow, "Caesar."

"Caesar?" Gabrielle immediately repeated, now standing to her feet and walking across the room to be closer to Xena. "What has he done?"

"He sent soldiers to capture Boudica's daughter." Alixandriah's breathing became noticeably heavier, "They succeeded, and now they're on their way back to Rome with her. She'll be tortured indefinitely before they finally kill her." Alixandriah's lips parted slightly as her voice lowered, taking on a softer tone, "I have to stop them, but I can't do it alone. They left Athens two days ago. Catching them is damn near impossible… without you."

"Boudica has a daughter?" Gabrielle asked surprised.

"Two." Xena clarified. "I met them several years ago, right after Prasutagus and Boudica granted me control over their army. Of course, they were only children then. What does he want with Boudica's daughter?"

"Retribution." Alix spat, "Punishment for defying Rome. Two springs ago, Boudica revolted against Caesar in Britannia. At first, it looked like she was going to be successful, but then the reinforcements came. Caesar massacred them in minutes after that. An entire nation of people, enraged as they were, instantaneously erased from the face of the earth."

"I heard." Xena replied sorrowfully. "I had planned to fight in the battle…" Her glance drifted over to Gabrielle, "but I was needed elsewhere." Xena cleared her throat, and composed herself, "I don't know how much of a difference I could have made, but I am sorry that I wasn't there."

"The past is full of mistakes we all would like to set right. We cannot waste time pondering what we could have done; instead, we must focus ahead on what we can do." Alixandriah stated sincerely, "What's important at the moment, is stopping those soldiers from returning to Rome. An innocent life depends on it."

"Do you have a trail to follow?" Xena asked, grabbing her leathers and armor.

"No." Alix replied, "But I do know that they're traveling on back roads. There's around fifteen of them. Most are on foot, a few have horses. They're not traveling incredibly fast, but with a two day head star and no direct trail to follow…"

"You could wander around for days and never spot a sign of them. You'd only be wasting your time." Xena confirmed.

"Exactly." Alix agreed, "If anyone can track them down, it's you, Xena."

"We can't leave without the supplies we came here for; however, it shouldn't take too long to gather everything we need."

Relief flooded through Alixandriah upon hearing the warrior's willingness to help, and with a look of genuine gratitude, she extended her hand to Xena, "Thank you. I'm indebted."

"No." Xena extended her hand as well, firmly gripping her friend's, "It's the very least that I owe to Boudica."

Alixandriah nodded in understanding, "I have supplies of my own that I will need. Give me your list. I will make the purchases for us both, and save time."

"We have no list." Xena admitted, "Basic traveling supplies will suffice. Whatever you'd buy for yourself, buy two of for us." Xena reached into her saddlebag, pulled out a money sack, and handed it to Alix, "This should cover our portion."

Before turning to leave, Alixandriah noticed the obvious uneasiness present on Gabrielle's face. Charmingly, and in a comforting voice, she spoke to the bard, "I apologize for intruding; no hard feelings, eh?"

Gabrielle, still somewhat playing catch-up with the morning's events, distantly replied, "No… no, not at all." She quickly tacked on a smile to conceal any awkwardness.

"I'll be back as soon as I can." Alix turned left for the market.

Gabrielle's eyes immediately shot towards Xena as soon as they were alone, "Xena, who in Tartarus is that?"

"Alixandriah." Xena replied shortly.

"Want to go into a little more detail?" Gabrielle asked folding her arms.

"She's in Caesar's top ten list of all-time greatest adversaries." Xena turned to face Gabrielle, "Alixandriah despises Caesar as much as I do, maybe more. She certainly has reason to."

"Why? What did he do to her?" Gabrielle asked eagerly.

"He wiped out her entire village, killing countless men, women, and children. Her parents were among the slaughtered. She was only a child when it happened. A few years later, she joined me in battle against Caesar during one of his invasions of Gaul. With our hatred and armies combined, Caesar was sure to taste the bitterness of defeat." Xena's voice lowered as she recalled the scene, " We trapped his entire army on the beaches of Gaul. We outnumbered him significantly; his soldiers dropped like flies. "But like the rat he is, he managed to escape. He watched entire legions fall dead in the sand, while he fled on a ship back to Rome."

"How come you've never told me about this? About her?"

Xena reached for her sword and carefully began to hone its edges with her whetstone, making sure it was sharp and prepared for their journey, "I try to leave my past exactly where it is." She remarked, "And as for Alixandriah… I assumed she was dead. I haven't seen her since the battle."

"It's odd that you trust someone from that many years ago." Gabrielle stated, clearly this was the major concern of the bard. "Usually, it's trouble when someone from your past appears."

"It wasn't that long ago, Gabrielle. It was the last battle I was in before I met Hercules. Alix is no threat. She joined me merely because I was going after Caesar. At first I thought she was some gullible kid that I could exploit and take control of her army for my own use. Turns out she wasn't so naïve. Her military tactics were sharp… precise. More importantly, her head was clear. I could tell she was enraged, but she wasn't malicious. She simply wanted Caesar to pay. That alone would have satisfied her. Gods, how I envied that, a thirst that was quenchable."

"That's comforting… I suppose." Gabrielle wryly remarked, though at least she felt somewhat more enlightened. "I'm glad we can do something helpful for Boudica." Gabrielle smirked, "And you get out of the poetry reading, which is probably what you had planned all along."

Xena let a smile cross her face, but it didn't stay long, "I'll make it up to you." She replied standing to her feet and placing her well-sharpened blade into its sheath. "We should pack. Alix won't be gone long."

Indeed, it wasn't long before Alixandriah returned with supplies, and a young mare tethered behind her own horse. Xena was outside saddling Argo when Alixandriah rode up into the stable.

"I have our supplies." Alix announced, jumping down from her horse and handing Xena a bag.

Xena looked through the bag. Satisfied, she tied it to Argo's saddle. "Why the extra horse?"

Alixandriah glanced over her shoulder at the mare, "For when we find Adalei. I figure we'll need to make a quick escape. In the mean time, your friend can ride her."

"Gabrielle isn't capable of keeping up on her own horse. She'll ride with me." Xena clarified.

"Good enough." Alixandriah nodded towards the room Xena had rented, where she assumed Gabrielle was, "Is she ready?"

"I am." Gabrielle answered, as she walked up behind the two women catching Alix a bit off guard. "I just finished breaking the news to Priam that we'd be leaving early. Needless to say, he's a little disappointed that we won't be staying longer."

"He'll survive just fine without a few extra dinars." Xena lead Argo out of the stable and mounted him, "Take the lead, Alix; we'll follow."

Alixandriah climbed atop her horse, "I figure the first part is easy. We simply take the most traveled road that leads to Rome. Along the way, we can stop to ask if anyone has seen Roman soldiers pass through. With any luck, we'll find the back road route they're taking."

Xena reached down and pulled Gabrielle up behind her, "I'm sorry, Gabrielle, but we must cover a lot of ground quickly today, and we'll move faster with you behind me."

"Try to keep up, Xena." Alixandriah good-humoredly remarked, as she kicked her horse and galloped out of the city, the mare running closely behind her.

"Hold tight." Xena forewarned, before mimicking Alixandriah's speedy exit out of the gates.

The women rode steadily for hours, breaking only when absolutely necessary. At times, the terrain was rough and inevitably slowed them down, but Alixandriah pushed forward relentlessly. After speaking with a few villagers along the way, and keeping an out for signs of a party traveling together, Xena had a general idea of which route they needed to follow. By dusk, they had found a place to set up camp, and allow the horses, and themselves, the opportunity to rest and regain stamina for the following day, which no doubt be just as brutal. After taking the horses down to the creek for water, Gabrielle returned to the campsite and collapsed onto her bedroll. Her body was fatigued and aching from the day's difficult ride, and she dreaded the very thought of repeating such a ride tomorrow. Within minutes, she had fallen asleep. Deciding to let her rest, Xena set aside some leftover rabbit from dinner. Perhaps Gabrielle would appreciate it in the morning; for now, she needed rest.

"Poor thing is exhausted." Alixandriah noted, gazing over at the sleeping bard, "Can't say it's been an easy ride, myself."

"I'm sure we've doubled the distance the soldiers made on their first day out of Athens." Xena replied, stoking the fire. "By tomorrow evening, we should be close on their trail."

"Thank you, again." Alixandriah leaned against a tree, warming herself by the fire, "I truly am grateful for your help. I can't say I would have been this successful on my own."

"What happened to you after the battle, Alix?" Xena asked casually, appearing to ignore Alixandriah's praise, "I never knew you made it out alive."

Alixandriah sighed heavily, "I almost didn't." She answered. "When I realized Caesar escaped, I attempted to call back my men, but they refused to retreat. They were too invested in the battle, and our victory, at that point. While trying to get them to obey my command, I was foolish enough to turn my back on the enemy. A Roman soldier ran straight up behind me, and stabbed me through the side." Alixandriah paused, "My men pounced on him immediately. He was dead in moments. With Caesar gone and my army out of my control, I staggered off the battlefield. Days later I awoke in a hospice. I had no idea how I had gotten there. Later on, I found out some travelers had discovered me lying by the roadside, and they were kind enough to take me to the nearest town. One might consider it a miracle."

"I had a miracle of my own." Xena smiled. "Two, actually." She corrected, as she glimpsed over at Gabrielle.

Alixandriah nodded, "So I've heard. Your encounter with Hercules followed by your path to self-redemption is a popular tale around Greece. You're a hero to many."

"I don't consider myself a hero." Xena replied gazing into the campfire.

"Perhaps that's what makes you one." Alix countered, "Your story is compelling. I for one am a witness of who you were then, and I can see how much you've changed now. I must admit that when I came to your door this morning, I was afraid you would not help me." Alix paused, gazing over at the warrior, "It's remarkable how much our fates have altered. Six years ago, I encouraged your dark side, just so I'd have the chance at repaying Caesar; today, I implored your humbleness."

"Then you understand that I'm curious as to why you have an interest in rescuing Boudica's daughter, but not once have you mentioned revenge on Caesar?"

"Adalei is more important than any grudge I have against Caesar." Alix answered truthfully.

"I see I am not the only one who has changed." Xena concluded.

"Caesar's destiny is at the end of a blade; you know that as well as I do. And we both know, it's simply a matter of time."

"You used to want to be on the other end of that blade." Xena reminded.

Alixandriah sneered at the thought, "I still do, Xena." She openly admitted. "I'll never be able to forgive him for the slaughter of my people, my family. And if he harms one hair on Adalei's head, I'll be the very person to fulfill his destiny."

"You're in love with her." Xena realized.

"I have been from the moment we met." Alix acknowledged. "I've wanted nothing more than to keep her safe; to protect her." She swallowed heavily, "A find job, I've done of that."

"Don't try to blame yourself." Xena interjected, "Like you said, it's not about what you could have done, it's about what you can do now." Xena reminded, hoping this would ease Alixandriah's mind. "As Boudica's daughter, she received military training, fine military training; I'm sure she's holding her own."

"No, Xena." Alixandriah corrected, shaking her head, "She never participated in the training. She decided against it. Nola was next to be Queen, even though Adalei was the oldest. Nola was groomed for the role. She had the instincts of a warrior, the characteristics of a leader, and the courage to plunge into battle. Adalei was never meant for war, she tried desperately stay clear of it, but that didn't stop her from reaping its rotten harvest." Alexandriah sighed heavily and glanced over the fire, "Are you aware of what happened to Boudica, Xena?"

Xena's body stiffened, "I had assumed she died in battle. I've heard nothing since leaving Britannia."

Alixandriah leaned forward, "No, she survived the battle. She even managed to return to her campsite without being captured, but she couldn't live with what she had done. The fields were flooded with the blood of her people. In her eyes, she had sacrificed them to Rome. She was stricken with immense grief. That night, Adalei and Nola listened to the heart wrenched cries of their mother, as she begged for their forgiveness. Repeatedly, they tried to comfort her, but her pain was too great. And then suddenly, it was silent; the weeping had stopped. Boudica laid there, motionless, tears still streaming from her eyes, but no life behind them. Adalei fell to her knees and tried desperately to aid her mother, but wrapped tightly in Boudica's hand was a small bottle of poison she had taken earlier that night."

Xena was quiet for a while; she seemed to lose herself in the flames of the fire. Over and over her memory played back the scenes of Britannia.

Alix broke the silence between them, "A few days later, Nola threw herself off one of the cliffs overlooking the ocean." she paused briefly, "War damages your soul, Xena. Either you become hard and disregard your humanity, or it gets the better of you and you'll do whatever it takes to end your suffering. Adalei's soul is damaged, and her heart has been broken. Yet, she lives through the pain instead of trying to escape it. In that sense, she is stronger than any warrior." Alix shook her head quickly, "I sound like a foolish romantic." She laughed lightly, realizing she was exposing quite a bit of herself to the other warrior. "Forgive me."

"You don't sound foolish." Xena replied respectfully, "I understand."

Alixandriah's eyes darted over to the sleeping bard, "I'm sure you do." She stood to her feet and dusted herself off, "You've been wonderful company, Xena, but I must rest for tomorrow." With that, she took off towards her bedroll for the night.


	3. III

**A/N:** Just a heads up that I did some editing to this chapter. I spotted quite a few typos that the word processor didn't pick up. Things like "me" instead of "men" and "or" instead of "of." Nothing more than annoying, and I'm sorry I didn't catch them sooner. I'm always eager to post a new chapter, and though I've read something a dozen times, it usually takes a few days later and pair of fresh eyes to spot my mistakes. Regardless, every time I spot errors I always make sure to correct them and post the edited version. Forgive me for being hasty.

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**Anchored **

**III**

**(One)**

The sun was barely peeking through the forest canopy, and already Xena was up and packing her bedroll. If Alixandriah had expected to get an early jump on the warrior, she had failed. It wasn't until after Xena accidentally stepped on a twig, causing it to snap, that Alix jerked from her sleep.

"Sorry." Xena replied, as she turned quickly and spotted Alix reaching for her sword.

Alix laughed and released her weapon, "Don't apologize. You should have woken me sooner." She stood to her feet.

"I haven't been up long." Xena answered, "I was just about to take Argo down to the creek for a drink."

"Allow me." Alix interjected, "I'm sure they'd all appreciate some food and water before we start." She walked over and took Argo's reins, then led the horses away from the campsite.

Xena looked down at Gabrielle who was still sleeping. She sighed lightly knowing the difficulty that awaited her; she knelt down closer to the bard. "Gabrielle, wake up." She gently shook the younger woman's shoulder, "Come on, rise and shine." Gabrielle mumbled a few incoherent words, and then turned away from the warrior, "Hey, none of that." Xena scolded, "You have wake up." Xena turned Gabrielle over, "Come on." She lifted on the bard, placing her in a sitting up position, "For Zeus sake, Gabrielle, it's like trying to wake the dead with you."

Gabrielle's eyes slightly opened, it was clear she was still heavy with sleep, "I'm up…" she muttered unhappily.

"Are you hungry? There's fish left over from last night." Xena reached for her pack, "Or if you'd prefer something lighter, I have some berries."

"No, I'm not hungry." Gabrielle groggily interrupted. "I'll eat something later." She stretched and slowly climbed to her feet, "I feel like I've been run over by an elephant." She grimaced.

"The soreness will go away soon." Xena replied, standing upright, "The worst of it will be today." She reached over and placed her hand on Gabrielle's arm, "Gabrielle, there's something you should know." Gabrielle's facial expression shifted after hearing the bleakness of Xena's tone. Her eyes widened a bit, as she awaited the warrior's next words. "Boudica didn't die in the battle like we had imagined. She poisoned herself afterwards."

Gabrielle recoiled, "Xena, that's awful." She looked away for a moment, shaking her head, "Why?"

"She was in grief over the loss of her people." Xena answered somberly.

Gabrielle inhaled deeply and placed a hand on her forehead, "Gods, if only I wasn't such a …"

"Gabrielle, no." Xena held up her hand not allowing her friend to finish, "I understand that you feel blame for what happened, so do I, but we can't allow ourselves to carry that guilt. What happened in Britannia was tragic… for everyone. We've all suffered. Pointing fingers isn't going to change anything, and it certainly won't help us now."

"You're right." Gabrielle nodded. "Our focus is on Adalei." She reached over and took Xena's hand in her own. "I'm sure she's hurting worse than anyone."

Xena glanced over Gabrielle's shoulder, and spotted Alixandriah approaching the campsite with the horses in tow. She released Gabrielle's hand, "Pack your things." She instructed and then stepped around the bard. She met Alix in the middle of the campsite, and took over Argo's reins.

"Argo's a fine horse, Xena." Alix replied, patting her on the nose, "Strong, beautiful." She added. "You two make a great team."

"Careful, Alix. I don't want Argo to get the big head." Xena smiled, looking up at her horse. She placed her saddle across Argo's back and fastened it securely.

Alixandriah's attention fell upon Gabrielle, who was busily packing her bedroll and gathering her belongings, "Good morning, Gabrielle." She greeted warmly while intently watching the woman.

Gabrielle briefly looked over and smiled, "Good morning."

"Eager for today's ride?" Alix teased stepping a few paces closer to the bard.

Gabrielle paused and glanced back at the other woman. Realizing her playful prodding, she laughed lightly, "My spirit is willing… can't say the same for my body."

A short laugh escaped from behind Alix's lips, "Don't let it get the best of you, gorgeous." she encouraged, "It gets easier." She grabbed her bedroll and stuffed it into her sack; then, in one quick motion, she was sitting atop her horse. "Ready when you are, Xena."

Gabrielle felt a wave of heat rush to her face. A few moments later, she realized she had just been flattered by Alix's charming remark. She brushed away the feeling quickly, and walked over towards Xena. Handing Xena her pack, she climbed upon Argo and took her place behind the warrior.

"Alixandriah." Xena called forth, gaining the woman's attention. "In about two candle marks, we're going to come to a fork in the road. Both routes eventually lead back to the same trail, but one is much longer and has several detours. If the soldiers are aware of this, they've taken the right fork, since it's shorter. If they're not aware, then that gives us a respectable advantage."

"Let us pray, then, that they are fools." Alix smirked, before immediately galloping off with both her horses.

"She certainly enjoys dramatic exits." Gabrielle spoke just in time to secure her grip around Xena before Argo sprinted off after the others.

Upon reaching the fork a while later, Alix instantly took the right turn as Xena had instructed. Soon after, the road transformed into to a steep hill and only the scarce remains of what used to be the trail that led up it. Clearly, the road had been washed out and out of use for a while. Alix slowed her steed, and quickly eyed the trail. Deciding to risk it, she pressed both horses up the hillside. They hadn't gotten farther than a few feet, when the moist dirt crumbled beneath them, and they slid back to the bottom of the hill.

"Alixandriah, it's too steep." Xena declared as she came riding up from behind.

Ignoring the warrior's warning, Alix pressed both horses again, this time the young mare refused to move. "Come on, you coward." Alix pulled on the mare's reins.

"Alix…" Xena's tone sharpened.

"It's all right, Xena. She's just frightened. I'll take them up one at a time." Alix untied the mare from her side. "I'll take my steed up first, then I'll come back for the mare."

"Alix, we'll search for another way. Don't risk it."

Alix glanced over her shoulder, "Don't be ridiculous, Xena, we can't waste time looking for another way." Alix kicked the stallion, and charged up the hillside. His hoofs dug deep into the soft dirt, but found little traction, slipping and loosing his footing countless times as Alix pushed onward up the hill. Miraculously, both Alix and her horse reached the top. Pleased with her performance, Alix wasted no time descending the hill on foot, so she could bring up the mare.

"Xena, she's going to get hurt." Gabrielle proclaimed from behind the warrior.

"Alixandriah, the mare won't make it." Xena cautioned once more. "We can take a detour around the hill, it will still be faster than taking the other fork."

Again Xena's warning had gone unacknowledged as Alixandriah charged the hillside while atop the young mare. Immediately, the mare reared up on its hind legs, and slid back down the hillside. Alix pushed the horse forward again, "Come on!" She yelled, "Climb!" Again the mare lost it's footing and slid further down the hill, but Alix refused to cease her pursuit.

"I can't watch this." Gabrielle replied, closing her eyes and turning her head away. When Gabrielle opened her eyes a couple of minutes later, she saw Alix standing victoriously on the top of the hill with both horses. "Xena, please, don't try it."

"Don't worry, Gabrielle. I'm not going to." Xena comforted.

"What are you waiting for?" Alix shouted down the hill, "It's not as bad as it looks!"

"We're going around!" Xena replied, "We'll catch up with you!"

Before Alix had a chance to object to Xena's decision, the warrior princess had taken off towards another path and vanished from Alix's sight. Alix zoomed down the hillside, determined not to lose another second. Under the assumption she would eventually have to stop and allow Xena time to catch up, she was completely surprised, when seemingly out of nowhere, the warrior appeared from the surrounding forest and onto the road beside her. Maintaining her speed, Alix glanced over at Xena, who was riding just as fast, and smiled in admiration of the warrior's superior riding skills. It wasn't until another candle mark later, when they stopped to rest for food and water, that Alix was made aware of how badly she had angered the warrior.

"Xena, you never cease to amaze me." Alix praised as she dismounted from her horse. "Just when I think I've one upped you, you come charging out of the forest, riding right beside me."

"Is that what it's about, beating me?" Xena interrupted, clearly annoyed.

Alix's cheery disposition faded, "No, of course not. I'm just impressed that you were able to catch up so quickly."

"What you did back there was foolish, Alix." Xena jumped down from Argo and stepped towards the woman, "You placed yourself in unnecessary danger, and for what, a chance to show off?"

Alix was hesitant to reply to Xena's harsh criticism, "Xena, our successfulness depends on our speed."

"Successfulness is a balance of reason and dexterity. In the time we spent watching you crawl your horses up the hillside, we could have taken the detour and been back on the main road. You wasted time, you didn't save it." Xena's eyes narrowed, "What good will you be to Adalei if you're laying crippled at the bottom of a hill?"

Alix looked away from Xena for a moment, no longer able to stare into the icy blue eyes, "You're right." She muttered swallowing her pride, "I'm sor-" before Alix was able to express her apology, Xena had already walked away from the conversation. Frustrated, Alix kicked the dirt beneath her feet and took off in the opposite direction.

After witnessing the argument, Gabrielle quickly slid off Argo's back and followed after Alixandriah. A few moments later, she spotted Alix sitting on a rock by the creek. She approached her cautiously, "Alix, don't let Xena upset you. I know it feels like she's judging you, but really she just wants to make you aware of…" Gabrielle paused realizing her next words probably wouldn't help her case.

"My mistakes?" Alix completed the sentence for her. "It's all right. I understand."

Gabrielle sighed, "She has a funny way of showing when she cares. Believe me, it took me forever to figure that out. When she's frightened she's quick to criticize those around her; it's her way of dealing with the situation. I know that's not a good excuse for her, not that I'm trying to make excuses, but…"

"Gabrielle, you don't have to explain." Alix interjected, "Xena's right. What I did was careless. I never should have risked the health and safety of my horses and myself, or expect you and Xena to do the same. I can't let my emotions cloud my reason."

Gabrielle sat down on the rock next to Alixandriah, "We're all guilty of letting emotions overpower us sometimes. Even Xena." She added.

"I know we're traveling quickly, but yet, it doesn't seem fast enough." Alix repositioned herself on the rock so that she was facing the slightly younger woman, "I keep wondering… Have they harmed her already? Will they harm her before we find her? Are they harming her right now?" Alix shook her head and sighed, "It's maddening." Gabrielle gently placed her hand on Alixandriah's shoulder, as an attempt to show comfort. "I know you're going to tell me not to think about it. I wish it were that easy."

"No." Gabrielle replied softly, "You're entitled to be worried; I would be too, but we can't allow ourselves to assume the worst; it will just eat away at you, if you do."

Alix cleared her throat and composed herself in front of the bard, "You're right." She smiled. Temporarily shaking off emotions, she stood from the rock, "You know, you really should eat something; we have to leave soon and we won't be stopping again till nightfall."

"Alix…" Gabrielle began to object, sensing the warrior's facade.

"Come on." Alixandriah extended her hand to Gabrielle, and assisted her off the rock, "There's some bread and cheese in my pack; I'll share it with you." Allowing the previous conversation to fade, Gabrielle followed her new friend back to the horses. Gabrielle took a seat on a nearby log, while Alixandriah squatted close by, facing the blonde.

"Thank you." Gabrielle replied politely as she reached out to take the food from Alixandriah's hand. "Did you buy this in Athens?"

"Yes." Alix answered taking a bite of the bread, "Do you like it?" she inquired. Gabrielle nodded in agreement as she chewed. "Good." Alix smiled. "You shouldn't have waited so long to eat you know, you missed dinner last night."

"I was so exhausted." Gabrielle admitted, "Too tired to even chew, I guess."

Alix chuckled at the bard's response; "I think you fell asleep before your head hit your pillow."

"You and Xena were up for a while?" Gabrielle asked casually.

"Not long. Maybe half a candle mark."

"Xena isn't much for talking. I'm surprised you were able to keep her up for that long." Gabrielle took another bite of the bread, "She told me about Boudica. I'm very sorry to hear."

Alix leaned over and took a seat on the log next to Gabrielle, "I never met Boudica." She stated impassively, finishing off the last of her cheese. "All I know is what Adalei has told me."

"I only met her once." The blonde recalled. "But she was very beautiful; powerful. I remember feeling a bit awe-struck around her, both a queen and a warrior."

"Gabrielle." Xena called from a few paces away, grabbing the bard's attention "Come on." she ordered, while climbing atop Argo.

Gabrielle turned back towards Alix and smiled, "I guess she's ready to go." She humored.

"Good." Alix replied, standing to her feet. "So am I." she offered her hand to Gabrielle, pulling her up from her seat. "Try not to fall asleep before dinner, eh?" Alix teased before releasing the bard's hand.

Xena slowly trotted over to Gabrielle, and lifted her up behind her. Her eyes drifted over to Alixandriah, "There's a clearing I know of where we can camp for the night. So if it's all right with you, I'd like to lead."

"Of course." Alix graciously complied.

**(Two)**

For the rest of the ride, and into the evening, Xena had been continuously brief with Alixandriah, speaking to her only when absolutely necessary. Picking up on the insensitive behavior, Gabrielle cornered Xena at their campsite while Alix volunteered to gather firewood.

"Xena, don't you think you've let this go on long enough?" Gabrielle questioned, coming up behind the warrior while she was unpacking her bedroll.

"What?" Xena replied nonchalantly.

"_You _know what." Gabrielle emphasized. "You made your point to Alix, and she's sorry. Can you just let it go, now?"

Xena turned quickly, facing the bard, "Gabrielle, I'm not harboring any hard feelings towards Alix, if that's what you're getting at."

Gabrielle burst out in a quick laugh, "Yes, you are Xena. You didn't even allow her the opportunity to apologize to you. You've been intentionally punishing her all day, just because she allowed her emotions to influence a decision."

"Would you rather I praise her bad decision making?" Xena countered, "Was I supposed to risk our lives and follow up her the hill?"

"No." Gabrielle spat, "Xena, I'm not defending what she did earlier today. I agree, it was foolish, but at that time it felt right to her, so she acted on it. She realizes it was a mistake."

"Amateur mistakes like that can cost lives." Xena threw her bedroll onto the ground, "She completely ignored my warnings."

"Is that what this is about?" Gabrielle's eyes narrowed, "You're mad because she didn't listen to you?" Xena didn't respond. "That's it, isn't it?" Gabrielle pressed, "She did something other than what you said and now you're being stubborn about forgiving her."

Becoming annoyed with Gabrielle's constant questioning and evaluating, Xena clinched her teeth, "Gabrielle, don't."

"Don't what?"

"Don't try to analyze this with all your philosophy and insight." Xena growled. "If she had fallen off her horse, or if the horse had fallen with her and she was laying injured or dead in the road, you'd be angry at me for not trying to stop her. I'm not going to let you make me feel guilty for causing her to realize she was careless and overconfident."

"Oh, because the Warrior Princess would never be overconfident. Nor would she ever make a decision based on how she _feels _about someone or something. That's not a mistake you would make it, is it Xena? How many times have you placed yourself in danger just to save another; to save me?" Gabrielle paused, "Maybe you see your emotionally driven decisions as something more heroic than merely climbing a steep hillside, but you shouldn't hold that against Alix. She's hurting Xena; she's entitled to be emotional."

Xena froze in her position, absorbing everything Gabrielle had thrown on her. Slowly, the anger in her subsided and embarrassment took over. Her breathing was heavy, her face blank. She closed her eyes for a moment, sinking her head into her hands. Gabrielle's influential way with words was both a blessing and a curse in its own right. When Xena lifted her head, Gabrielle was still standing there, focused on the warrior.

Realizing she had struck a chord with Xena, Gabrielle stepped closer to her and softened her tone, "Xena, I didn't mean to make you sound hypocritical."

"Yes, you did." Xena replied apathetically. "All day, I've let my anger cloud my reasoning, and that makes me a hypocrite." She admitted.

"You should talk to her." Gabrielle suggested. "Clear the air."

"Yeah…" Xena distantly replied, "I'll talk to her." Xena paused for a few moments, "Thanks for keeping me balanced, Gabrielle." She added with a quick smile that vanished just as quickly as it appeared. Gabrielle thought about reaching out to the warrior, perhaps even embracing her, but Xena had already turned and walked away before the bard had time to act on any thoughts.

When Alix returned with firewood a short while later, Xena invited her to go fishing. When Alix pointed out she had no fishing pole, Xena smiled and nodded towards Alix's two hands, "Of course you do." Leaving Gabrielle to prepare the fire and set up camp, the two warriors headed off towards the nearby stream.

"You do this often?" Alix asked, watching Xena carefully as she trudged around in cold water up to her knees.

"A few times a week." Xena answered, studying the water for any movement.

"So, this is how you caught the fish from last night?" Alix concluded. "Impressive."

Xena slowly sneaked closer to the edge of the stream, her focus pinpointed underneath one particularly large rock. Xena's eyes narrowed and her mouth opened slightly as she spotted her prey.

"What is it?" Alix asked eagerly, "Did you find something?"

"Yeah." Xena answered, "Dinner." She quickly penetrated the water with her hands, immediately pulling out a large salmon. It floundered uncontrollably in her hands, and it appeared as if Xena was about to lose her grip, just as she tossed the fish onto the bank. "Want to give it a go?" Xena asked, drying her face with her arm.

"You're a tough act to follow, Xena." Alix laughed. Thinking it over in her mind, she ultimately decided to enter the stream, "All right." She began, stepping into the cold water, "Any advice on technique?"

"Not particularly." Xena shrugged, "Keep a tight grip."

"Useful." Alix mocked. She gazed around the water, but saw no sign of movement. The sun was setting, and quite frankly, she had no idea how Xena was able to spot anything, especially if it was hiding under a rock. A few minutes passed before Alix finally grew frustrated, "It appears you got the last one." She humored, glancing up at the warrior.

"There's a little one to your left." Xena instructed, her eyes moving in the same direction.

Alix's eyes immediately followed, "I don't see it." Xena placed her hand on Alix's chin, turning her face to the correct position. "That?" Alix asked, peering closer into the water. "That just looks like a stick to me."

"Beside the stick, Alix." Xena remarked.

Suddenly, Alix saw the fish move. Overwhelmed with excitement, she plunged into the water, grasping for the creature. Losing her balance, she fell face first into the water. Xena quickly reached for her friend, helping her to her feet. She tried desperately to suppress her laughter, but failed.

"Are you all right?" Xena managed to ask, after composing herself.

"Never better." Alix replied with a smile, wiping the water from her eyes. "I was due for a bath, anyway."

"You scared the fish." Xena regretfully announced.

"Good…" Alix coughed, realizing she'd unwillingly swallowed some water. "We're even." Alix made her way over to the bank, and pulled herself out of the water. She examined her leg, and realized she had a decent sized gash on her knee.

"That could use a few stitches." Xena prescribed.

"No, it's okay." Alix objected. "I have some bandages in my pack. I can wrap it when we get back to camp. Once the bleeding stops, it'll be fine."

"It could get infected, you're best to sew it shut. Gabrielle's not bad with a needle. Head on back to camp, get dry and patched up." Xena instructed, "I'll finish up here."

"Sorry for not being much help." Alix slowly stood to her feet, "I'm much better with a pole, you know."

"You did fine." Xena replied sympathetically. "It takes some practice."

"Thanks for the lesson, Xena." Alix turned and began to slightly limp back towards the campsite.

"Alixandriah." Xena called, causing the woman to pause and look over her shoulder, "About today, I –"

"No need to apologize, Xena." Alix kindly interrupted.

"No, I do need to apologize." Xena continued, "I was being stubborn and a bit spiteful. I know that finding Adalei is very important to you, and I didn't mean to undermine that."

"Yeah, well, I shouldn't have ignored you. I don't blame you for becoming upset with me." Alix took a few steps back towards Xena and extended her hand, "Let's forget the whole thing, eh?"

Xena returned the handshake, "It's forgotten."

"If you happen to catch that little bastard," Alix began, nodding towards the stream, "save him for my plate."

A few minutes later, a wet and cold Alixandriah arrived at the campsite. Gabrielle had just finished unpacking for the night, and was waiting patiently for Xena to return with dinner. When she spotted Alixandriah walking through the clearing, she immediately took to her feet.

"Alix, what on earth happened?" She asked walking up beside the woman.

"Turns out I'm better with a pole." Alix joked, making her way over to her bedroll. She rummaged through her pack for some dry clothes.

"You fell in." Gabrielle concluded. "You must be freezing." Her eyes landed upon Alix's gashed knee, "And you're hurt."

"It's nothing." Alix reassured. "A small cut; that's all." Alix exited the campsite, dry clothes in hand, and returned a few moments later wearing a long sleeved cloth shirt and a pair of wool pants. She spread her leather armor across a tree branch, allowing it to dry.

"You seem different without your armor." Gabrielle noticed.

Alix looked herself over, "Manly, you mean ?" Gabrielle didn't immediately reply, so Alix took her lack of a response as a yes. "It's all right, Gabrielle. After all, these are a man's clothes. Comfortable though, and that's why I wear them when I'm not in my armor."

"I don't think you look manly." Gabrielle corrected, "It actually suits you very well." She reached for her pack and pulled out a needle and thread, "You're going to need stitches for your knee."

"Really, you don't have to bother with that. I can bandage it up and –"

"Alix, sit down." Gabrielle ordered, "You can't let the wound stay open like that."

Giving in, Alix did as she was told. She rolled up her pant leg, exposing the wound. Gabrielle moved closer, examining the gash. "It's deep." Gabrielle observed, "You must have landed on a sharp rock."

"How many stitches?" Alix asked casually.

"A few." Gabrielle answered, "Ten should take care of it." Gabrielle cleaned the wound, and then slowly inserted the needle into Alix's skin. Feeling the woman wince, she put forth an extra effort to be gentle. A few minutes later, she had finished. "There…" Gabrielle smiled, "Better?" she asked glancing up towards the warrior.

"Yes." Alix replied, returning the friendly smile. "Thank you." Alix rolled down her pant leg, "How's the soreness today?"

"Bearable."

"You'll start to get used to it soon; you won't even notice after a while." Alix stood to her feet. "Before long, you'll be wanting a horse of your own." She remarked playfully, making her way over to her bedroll and sitting down, allowing herself the opportunity to rest and be warmed by the fire.

Gabrielle sat silently across the campfire from Alix as they waited for Xena's return. In an attempt to not be rude, Gabrielle timed her gazes a few minutes apart, as she studied the other woman's appearance. She was tall in stature, perhaps about the same height and weight as Xena, toned and bronze skinned as well. The similarities stopped there. Alixandriah's hair was a few shades darker than Gabrielle's, but more of a mixture of browns and blondes together, and she kept it tied neatly behind her ears, allowing a few pieces to hang freely around her face; it suited her well. At first glance, one may mistake Alix's eyes as blue, but they were actually a light gray.

Being from Gaul, she was clearly distinguishable from any Greek or Roman, and if her appearance didn't give it away, her dialect did. The more Gabrielle heard it, the more she enjoyed it. The way she emphasized particular vowels and the unique tone inflections of certain words caused Gabrielle to pay more attention to how Alix said something, rather than what she was actually saying. Regardless, it all came across as charming and witty; crediting her charm to her accent alone, however, would be incredibly unfair. Alix's charisma wasn't completely unintentional; it was in her character to be likable. She was courteous and thoughtful, which generally did not go unappreciated; especially, by someone such as Gabrielle.

The sound of something plopping down in the grass beside her disturbed Gabrielle; thus, breaking her from her daydreaming. She looked down to see three ugly fish heads staring up at her. "Xena, you know I don't like to make eye contact with my dinner."

"Relax, Gabrielle. I'm about to take care of it." Xena replied, digging through her pack for a small knife.

"Here, use mine." Alix reached in her pack and tossed Xena her hunting knife.

Xena turned in time to catch the knife, "Thanks." Xena began preparing the fish, placing them on the frying pan when they were ready. A few minutes later, all three women were enjoying the cooked meal.

"How close do you think we are?" Alix asked, chewing mindlessly on her food.

"Half a day, perhaps." Xena replied.

"Tomorrow afternoon, then."

Xena glanced over at her friend, "You said there's around fifteen of them?"

"Give or take a few." Alix answered. "Why?"

"Just curious as to what to expect tomorrow. If we split the fighting between us, Gabrielle should be able to release Adalei."

"She'll be tied a horse of her own, I'm sure. Probably led in the middle of the pack."

"That sounds about like their style." Xena agreed. "I can attack the head, while you attack the rear. Hopefully we provide enough of a distraction for Gabrielle to untie Adalei and make an escape."

"Xena, while we're discussing it, there is something I'd like to ask you." Alix set down her plate, now devoting her full attention to the warrior. "Your reputation states that you only kill when absolutely necessary. Is that true?"

Gabrielle stopped eating as well and also focused her attention on Xena, awaiting her response.

"Yes." Xena replied shortly, "I try to avoid taking a life if at all possible."

Alix sighed, "Then I won't ask you to dishonor your vowel, but I have to insist that you don't try to stop me tomorrow."

"Alix…" Xena began.

"Xena, before you say anything, please understand that I have to do what is best for Adalei." Alix swallowed heavily, then continued, "If there is one soldier left alive, he will dispatch to Caesar everything that has happened, then we'll become fugitives of Rome. I can't allow that. If I kill them all, then Caesar will never know what happened, and we won't be chased."

"You're wrong." Xena objected, "Caesar stays in correspondence with his men regularly. He has messengers all across the empire that constantly relay information to him. The second Adalei was captured, a messenger was sent to Rome. I guarantee it. When his party doesn't return with Adalei within the appropriate time frame, he'll know something is wrong, and he'll send more soldiers regardless."

"Then we'll track the messenger." Alix concluded.

"It's impossible. They're disguised extremely well. They have secret posts where they meet up with other messengers and communicate information; sometimes the original messenger isn't the one who actually delivers to Caesar. He designed the entire system to be undetectable."

"Then how do you know so much about it?" Alix asked, becoming noticeably aggravated.

"Because I know Caesar." Xena quipped.

"So, what can we do?" Gabrielle asked, attempting to steer the conversation towards a resolution.

"We may not be able to track the messengers, but we may be able to control the messages themselves."

"But there's already a message on it's way to Caesar that Adalei has been captured." Gabrielle reminded.

"I see where you're going, Xena." Alix smirked, "You want to send a message that Adalei is dead; and then, Caesar will cease looking for her. It's crafty, I'll give you that."

"Do you think it would work?" the bard questioned.

"It's better than going on a blind killing spree." Xena remarked.

Alix exhaled deeply, "Any ideas on how to get this message to Caesar?"

"The easiest way would be allowing the soldiers to see her dead body."

Alix pondered the thought for several moments, "How are we supposed to do that exactly?"

"There's a poison I know of, it won't actually kill her, but to the naked eye she'll appear dead." Xena explained, "I may be able to find it at a market in Ioannina."

"A poison?" Alix hesitated. "I don't like the sound of that. Have you used it before?"

"A few times." Xena admitted. "It's very convincing."

Alix gazed off into the fire, contemplating Xena's suggestion thoroughly before answering. Placing her trust in Xena, she finally agreed to the plan. After working out the general strategy of their attack, Alixandriah excused herself for the evening and retired to her bedroll. Xena helped Gabrielle clean up the campsite, and then placed a few extra pieces of wood on the fire before lying down. The temperature was dropping steadily each night as they neared closer and closer to the season change. It wouldn't be much longer until the first snowfall of the season, which always ushered in the winter solstice.

Gabrielle buried herself in her furs, appreciating their warmth. She was lying close to Xena, as she often did. She could reach out and touch the warrior with her hand at will. She lay there for a few moments, comparing Xena and Alix in her mind. They were alike in so many ways, different in so many more. Suddenly an exasperated sigh exited Xena's body.

"Go to sleep, Gabrielle." Xena instructed, never opening her eyes.

Gabrielle laughed softly, "How did you know I was awake?"

"I can feel when you're staring at me. It's annoying." Xena remarked, her eyes remaining closed.

"I wasn't staring." Gabrielle defended. "I was just noticing."

"Noticing what?" Xena asked, wishing to end the conversation as quickly as possible.

"How much you and Alix are alike; how much you're different." Gabrielle replied.

"It's the leather, female, warrior thing…" Xena mumbled.

Gabrielle smiled, "No, it's not just that. It's a lot of things." She continued, "She reminds me of you, and yet she doesn't. Isn't that interesting, than you can feel two completely different things about the same person?"

"Mmhmm." Xena replied, moving into a more comfortable position inside her bedroll.

"You're not even listening." Gabrielle scolded, smacking Xena on her shoulder. Xena's body flinched from the unexpected contact. Eyes still shut, she reached over and grabbed the bard's hand that had smacked her, holding it in her own. "That's your defense, huh?" Gabrielle asked smugly.

"Don't even think about smacking me with the other one." Xena warned.

"Or what?" Gabrielle asked eagerly.

"I have rope in my pack." Xena replied, one eyebrow rising higher than the other.

Gabrielle smiled and shook her head, "Really, you'd tie me up?"

"If my sleep depends on it, yes." Xena replied, her voice drifting off.

Realizing how truly tired Xena was, Gabrielle let the playful exchange drop. She scooted closer to Xena, cupping her free hand around the larger one that held hers. "Good night, Xena." She whispered.


	4. IV

**A/N: **I would like to apologize for the long delay in posting a new chapter. I have been going on several job interviews, helping a friend of mine move into a new apartment, and I started a new graduate program this week. So, updating has been a bit difficult. However, I would like to thank everyone for taking an interest in my story. I have had some some trouble writing chapter 4, but I believe I've gotten my point across. Hopefully. lol. This story's foundation is down and now the plot can really begin to build. I'm looking forward to the next few chapters. You can expect a lot of interaction between the four women as they identify, question, and express their emotions.

* * *

Anchored

IV

**(I)**

She set atop her horse, as if she were not a prisoner, but an honored guest. She held her head high, and there appeared to be no fear on her face. As the Roman soldiers marched steadily out of the forest, Xena and Alixandriah quickly plotted their ambush.

"The open field will be to our advantage." Xena spoke aloud. "It will allow us to move quickly in many directions around them."

"I'm ready." Alix replied, staring down the hillside and into the field.

"Wait for my signal." Xena climbed atop Argo, "And put on your best performance." She slowly rode down the hillside, preparing to meet the Roman soldiers. Gabrielle stayed behind with Alix.

"Are you nervous?" asked Gabrielle, placing a hand on Alix's shoulder.

Alix's eyes drifted over to the smaller woman, "Yes." She admitted. "I am."

"So am I."

"Xena knows what she's doing. I trust her." Alix glanced back to the field.

Gabrielle smiled, "It's a comforting feeling, isn't it? To have enough faith in someone's actions, even when things look so bleak."

"Is that why you love her?" Alix asked, her eyes falling back to Gabrielle.

Unsure of how to respond to such a question, Gabrielle hesitated to reply. "I love Xena for many reasons, but I can't deny that that is one of them." The bard finally answered.

"She's your protector." Alix concluded.

Gabrielle laughed lightly, "I guess so. I used to despise the idea of needing protection; I thought it meant that I was weak, but I've learned that feeling safe is not something to be ashamed of…" she paused, "We're all in need of protection of something. We all want to feel safe in some way or another. It's always a good thing when you can find that in someone, and offer it as well."

"You mean a partnership."

Gabrielle nodded, "That's what Xena and I have. Though sometimes I feel like I offer little in return."

Alix's curiosity deepened, "And what is that you offer to Xena?"

Gabrielle looked away for a moment, unable to answer the question while she looked Alixandriah in the eye, "My friendship…" she replied quickly, "My trust and loyalty…" she added in a lower voice.

"Nothing more?" Alix inquired, though it did not appear that she was criticizing Gabrielle's contributions.

"I would give Xena anything she needed. Everything that I could." Gabrielle insisted, as if she needed to convince herself more than Alix. "She just never seems to…"

"What?" Alix edged closer, "She never seems to...?"

"Need much." Gabrielle finished, her tone saddening.

Alix frowned, "I'm sure she needs more than you may think." Out of the corner of her eye, she spotted the soldiers exiting the forest. She quickly turned her full attention to the field, and waited eagerly for Xena's command. Gabrielle did the same, allowing the conversation to evaporate into the air.

Upon seeing the raven-haired warrior slowly approaching them, the commanding officer halted his men. He had heard enough stories to recognize this woman, and he immediately understood he must proceed with caution. As they came closer, Xena appeared to be no threat, but merely wished to speak to the commanding officer.

"Hello." Xena squinted her eyes from the sunlight, as she greeted the men.

"I know who you are." Fabius replied, "We don't want any trouble, Xena."

Xena's eyes glanced over to the young woman tied to the horse, "Looks like you have a prisoner. What has she done?" Xena asked casually.

"She's a traitor to Rome." Fabius answered.

"That's not what I asked." Xena replied shortly. "What has she done?"

Fabius looked over his shoulder at his men, they all place hands on their swords. He turned his head back to Xena and smiled, "She has betrayed Rome." He answered smugly.

"I know this woman." Xena edged closer to the Roman party.

"If you know this woman, then you would know she assisted in a revolt against Caesar."

"In Britannia."

"Yes." Fabius answered, his mind quickly wondering what Xena's intentions were.

"Boudica." Xena's tongue snapped.

"This is not Boudica." Fabius quickly interjected, "This is …"

"Her daughter." Xena answered. "I'm aware." Her lip curled as she slowly slid off the side of Argo and stepped towards Fabius; each soldier gripped their swords tighter, as the warrior was now only a few feet away, "Her mother's foolish actions cost my friend and me dearly. Does she face death in Rome?" Xena paced back and forth while gazing at the tied and gagged woman, but Adalei made no sign that she recognized Xena, nor cared that she was there.

"Perhaps. That is for Caesar to decide." Fabius remarked, watching Xena closely.

Xena reached for her sword. Simultaneously, the sound of every Roman's sword sliding out of its sheath filled the air. Xena pointed her sword at Adalei, "I haven't forgotten what you owe me." Xena growled.

"Put down your sword, Xena." Fabius warned, "She is the property of Caesar."

"Caesar can burn in Hell."

"Xena!" Alixandriah yelled as she came galloping into the field, Gabrielle holding on tightly behind her. "Stop!" she begged as she came closer. Everyone's attention shifted to Alix. "Xena, please, put down your sword."

Xena's sword remained pointed at Adalei, her eyes barely drifted over, "I'm sorry, Alixandriah. I can't let her live." Xena snarled.

Alix jumped down from her horse, "Xena, what are you doing? This isn't what we planned!"

"I have a new plan." Xena mocked. "She deserves to pay for she's done."

Gabrielle jumped down as well, "Xena, she didn't do anything!"

"I suggest you listen to your friends, Xena." Fabius pulled out his sword and stepped forward, "I cannot let you take the life of this woman; it is not your life to take."

"Would everyone, please, just put away their swords?" Gabrielle's voice rose. She stepped closer to Xena, "Xena, what's gotten into you? You know this isn't right. You can't do this." she coaxed, "I won't let you destroy everything you believe in, everything you've worked so hard to become."

"Her mother is the reason you ended up at that temple." Xena's voice was cold, "She's the reason that Hope was able to destroy our lives… and kill my son."

"What? No. Xena, she's innocent, you know that." Gabrielle reasoned. "Put your sword away, Xena, please."

"She's not innocent…" Xena placed one her hand on her chakram and lifted it off its clip.

"Xena." Alixandriah's voice hardened, "I won't let you do this."

"Let's see you stop me." Xena threw her chakram, slashing three of the Roman soldiers in a mere second. Instantaneously, Fabius and his men attacked, and the battle broke out between them. It didn't take long for the three women to rough up the small band of soldiers, knocking each of them to the ground with hard blows. Fabius himself finally took on Xena, only to be pummeled to the ground as well. Catching a brief moment when Adalei was left unguarded, Xena took advantage of her opportunity. Quickly, she pulled out a small blowgun and dart, and aimed it at the young captive.

"No!" Gabrielle shouted, as she leaped towards Xena in an attempt to halt the action, but failed. The dart penetrated the back of Adalei's neck, and within seconds she fell from the horse and crashed onto the hard ground.

Alix's attention immediately shifted to Xena's target; she threw off the last Roman soldier and ran to Adalei's side, cupping her head in hands. "Adalei!" Fabius and his men stared in awe as Alix desperately tried to revive the woman. "Please… no…" Alix whispered, tears drenched her eyes. "Gods, no!"

"Xena, how could you?" Gabrielle's voice cracked in disbelief.

Xena's eyes widened as she gawked at the lifeless body. She was unable to form words as her mouth hung open, "I … I… "

"You really killed her!" Alix roared, jumping to her feet. "You weren't supposed to actually hurt her!" Alix drew her sword and marched angrily towards Xena. Their blades sparked in the air between them. "You said the poison would be safe!"

Xena violently pushed the woman away, her breathing was heavy as her shoulders moved up and down. "It would have been, if I had bought the right poison." she defended, her body slightly shaking. "When I was at the market, all I could think about was Solan and Hope and Gabrielle… I just wanted vengeance." Xena paused, tears forming her eyes. "I don't know what came over me."

"I'll tell you what came over you, Xena. Your darkness!" Alix screeched. "You claim that you seek salvation, but the truth is you'll never be able to escape who you really are. I should have known better to ask for your help. You're nothing but a fake! You wanted your vengeance? Well, you have it. May you suffer eternally in Tartarus because of it. " Alix turned and headed back to Adalei's body.

"What are you doing?" Fabius asked, rushing over to the woman.

"I'm taking her." Alix proclaimed.

"I can't let you." Fabius stepped in front of the woman.

Alixandriah drew her sword, slashing the man's arm and throwing him to the ground. As he lay on his back, holding his wound, she towered over him, her sword pressed into his throat. "Don't be a fool." She warned, "I will kill anyone who tries to stop me. She will receive a proper burial. What does it matter to Caesar now? She's dead." Fabius said nothing. Alix lifted Adalei into her arms, and gently placed her body across the young mare. She glanced over at Gabrielle, "I don't know how you can stand there beside her. Not after this."

Gabrielle broken heartedly looked up at the warrior, "I can't." She muttered and hung her head. "I can't stand beside you, Xena. Not this time." She slowly began to walk away.

"Gabrielle." Xena called and reached out for the bard, but Gabrielle smacked Xena's hand away. Xena watched as Gabrielle climbed up behind Alixandriah and slowly rode out of the field, neither of them looking back.

**(II)**

When they were a safe distance away from the Roman soldiers, Alixandriah found a suitable place to make camp. As Gabrielle began to build a fire, Alix carefully lifted Adalei's body down from the horse, and stretched her out across her bedroll. Alix ran her fingers over Adalei's pale, lifeless, face, and then planted a tender kiss upon her forehead.

"She really appears dead." Alix whispered, but Gabrielle was able to hear.

"She'll be all right." Gabrielle reassured. "The poison will wear off in a few hours."

Xena came riding up to the camp, eager to see the women. As she climbed down from Argo, she approached Alixandriah, "How is she?"

"Her breathing is faint, but she's alive." Alix smiled and stood to her feet. "Thank you, Xena. Thank you, so much." She extended her hand to the other warrior, but their handshake turned into an embrace. "That was quite a performance back there." She stated, pulling away. "I almost found myself believing it was real."

"Good." Xena let a smile quickly flash across and vanish from her face, "What's important is that we convinced the soldiers."

"There's no doubt we convinced them." Gabrielle bragged as she came over to Xena and wrapped an arm around her, "Did you see the looks on their faces after you shot that dart? They were all shocked. They all believed that you'd given into your dark side, Xena."

"It's not that far fetched of an idea." Xena remarked, releasing herself from Gabrielle's half embrace. She walked closer to Adalei and checked her over; convinced she would wake soon, she put her mind to rest.

"Xena, that's not what I meant." Gabrielle protested.

"It's all right. I know what you meant."

"How will she be when she awakes?" Alixandriah asked.

"Groggy. Disoriented."

"Will she remember what happened?"

Xena nodded, "Most likely."

Alix laughed, "She'll think she's woken from the dead."

"That's sort of what it's like."

"Gods, I've missed her so much." Alix kneeled down once more next to her lover, "I can't wait for her to wake so I can see her eyes… speak to her… hold her." Alix affectionately grabbed Adalei's hand, "I want to make sure she's all right, that they didn't hurt her any way."

Gabrielle watched Alixandriah closely, noticing the intimate touches and caresses she placed upon Adalei. She felt a knot tie in her stomach, and a wave of apprehension rush through her body.

"I'll see about finding some food. This area is plentiful with game." Xena announced, "She'll have a good meal when she wakes."

"I would offer to come hunt with you," Alix began, "but if it's all right, I'd rather stay here by her side."

"Of course." Xena replied sincerely.

Gabrielle quickly grabbed her staff. "I'd love to come hunting with you, Xena."

"Gabrielle, you can't hunt with a staff." Xena teased.

Gabrielle laughed lightly, but with a hint of uneasiness, "Then I'll just come along for support."

Xena turned and faced the bard, "Why? You hate hunting. How many times have you told me that you don't like to make eye contact with your dinner, huh?"

"Xena." Gabrielle cast Xena a look. "I want to come hunting." She emphasized.

Xena did not object again to Gabrielle's request. The two left the camping site and headed into the nearby woods to look for their prey. Gabrielle clearly had something she wished to discuss, and once they had traveled out of earshot of the camp, she spoke her mind.

"Xena, is there something you may have forgotten to tell me?" Gabrielle asked, as she marched up beside the warrior.

Xena stopped in her tracks and faced her friend, "Not that I recall."

"Don't play coy with me, Xena." Gabrielle warned. She leaned her head to one side and set her jaw. "You had to see the way Alix was acting back there at camp."

"Like what?"

"Like… _that." _Gabrielle stressed. "She was being so intimate."

Suddenly, Xena caught on. She laughed lightly, attempting to shrug off the conversation, "Gabrielle, of course she's going to be intimate with Adalei."

Gabrielle's mouth slightly opened, "So, they are?"

"Lovers? Yes." Xena remarked, placing her hands on her sides.

"Hey, don't get temperamental with me. I'm the one that's been left out of the loop here."

"There's no loop, Gabrielle." Xena placed a hand on the bard's shoulder.

"How long have you known?"

"Not long." Xena answered, "We talked about it the first night of camp."

Gabrielle exhaled, "Wait a minute. You've known since the first night and you didn't tell me?"

"I didn't think it mattered." Xena defended.

Gabrielle's frustration was evident, "You intentionally neglected to tell me."

"No." Xena shook her head, "Gabrielle, I wasn't trying to hide anything from you. Why are you so upset? I didn't think you'd be so concerned with this."

"I'm not." She quickly folded her arms, "It just would have been nice to know. A simple, 'Hey, Gabrielle, Adalei is Alix's lover.' would have been appreciated."

"It's not my place to tell Alixandriah's business. If you wanted to know, you could have asked her. She's very open about it."

"Clearly, she's not shy." Gabrielle remarked.

Xena hesitated for a moment, "Does this make you uncomfortable?"

"No…" Gabrielle's voice softened, "I mean… a little… I just wasn't expecting…" She paused. "I just wish you had told me."

"Look, I'm sorry I didn't tell you. If I had known it was going to be this important to you, I would have."

If Xena had left the statement at that, it would have been enough to satisfy Gabrielle and the conversation would have ended, but she decided to add one more sentence; a sentence that set into motion the very question of their own relationship.

"I just assumed you'd put it together, I guess."

"Why would you assume that?" Gabrielle's mind suddenly shifted directions.

"Well, I mean, the way Alix acted back at camp a few minutes ago is obvious, but didn't you ever wonder before? Why she cared so much, I mean…" Xena studied the younger woman's face, and was surprised to find it blank.

"No." Gabrielle replied. "Xena, why would I assume that they must be lovers because Alix had an interest in saving her?"

Finding herself in an uncomfortable position, Xena stumbled over her next few words; "You know…" she began, "Just the way she talked about her… the way she behaved. She was willing to risk everything… she didn't even have an interest in Caesar."

Gabrielle narrowed her eyes, "That's your reason?"

"What?" Xena's voice flooded with aggravation. She wanted this awkward and unpleasant conversation to be over, no good was coming from it.

"You speak as if you've never seen anyone behave that way before."

"No, it's just the way she did it… the tone of her voice… the affection when she said her name… the deep concern that she had about her safety…" Xena's eyes wandered back and forth as she searched for a way to explain it.

"You mean the way I feel about you?" Gabrielle interjected, causing Xena's eyes to snap into focus. "The way you supposedly feel about me? That way we are willing to risk everything for each other… the concern we have for each other's safety and well-being? Is that what you're referring to?"

A look of fear blanketed Xena's face. She was in no way prepared to have this conversation. She swallowed heavily, "Gabrielle… I… I didn't mean…"

Gabrielle backed away, "I'm going back to camp." Realizing she had tears forming in her eyes, partly out of anger, partly out of confusion and frustration, Gabrielle wanted nothing else now, but to eject herself from the conversation.

"Wait…" Xena reached out her hand, grabbing hold Gabrielle's arm, "I'm sorry."

"No, you're right. I shouldn't be so concerned about it." She turned and left.


	5. V

_ A/N: Again, historically speaking, Xena is a bit inaccurate. In season six there's an episode where Gabrielle wishes to get Sappho tickets, but technically Sappho had been dead for over 500 years. For this particular chapter, I'm going to go against Xena coherency, just a little, and make reference to Sappho as she actually existed in history. _

**(I)**

Gabrielle made sure to compose herself before arriving back at the campsite. As half expected, Alix had not left Adalei's side. However, she did glance up and offer a smile to Gabrielle as a welcome back gesture. Gabrielle attempted to walk by the couple without making much eye contact or conversing. She had hundreds of questions zooming around in her mind, but she wasn't nearly prepared to ask any of them. She pulled out her scrolls and quill and sought comfort in her writing. A few minutes later, she realized Alixandriah was standing overtop of her. Startled, she jumped and dropped her quill. Alix bent down, picked it up, and then kindly returned it to the bard.

"Are you writing about today?" Alix asked, squatting next to her friend.

"Uh…" Gabrielle's mouth hung open slightly, "Um. Yes." She finally answered.

Alix smiled, "I'm envious of Xena. She has someone to write down all of her accomplishments; that makes it easier to forget the mistakes."

Gabrielle rolled up her scroll, focusing her attention completely on Alix, "Xena doesn't read my work. She never has." Gabrielle paused, "And it seems like she always remembers her mistakes."

"Perhaps… but you effect the opinion of those who do read your work. I know that Xena has worked very hard to transform her reputation, but it wouldn't be so successful without your writing." Alix took a seat on the ground next to Gabrielle, "You know, Adalei enjoys writing and reading as well. She's read everything she can get her hands own since she was a little girl. She especially likes poetry though."

"So do I." Gabrielle agreed, "I've read Sappho so many times that I have several of her poems memorized."

"Sappho…" Alix repeated, "The island of Lesbos."

"That's the one."

"I don't recall anything specific, but I know that she wrote about love between women."

"And men… among other things." Gabrielle folded her arms neatly across her lap, "She believed in the freedom of love; she never bound it to a man nor a woman."

"Yes." Alix nodded, "I like that idea, the freedom to love whomever you please." She glanced over at Adalei. "Xena never mentioned our relationship, did she?" Alix looked back to Gabrielle; Gabrielle's mouth opened, but no words escaped. She had no response prepared, nor could she think of one quickly. "It's all right." Alix reassured, "I should have told you myself."

Gabrielle titled her head down, away from the warrior, "It's your business, Alix."

Alix reached over and placed her hand under Gabrielle's chin, gently lifting her head up till they held each other's gaze again, "Please, don't let us make you feel uncomfortable. I'd sooner leaver than inconvenience you more than I already have."

Gabrielle chuckled lightly, playfully pushing Alix's hand away, "Alix, you're not an inconvenience." She chuckled a second time, now feeling more at ease and realizing perhaps she had overreacted, "I'm sorry… I hope I haven't made you feel unwelcomed. I would never want to do that." Gabrielle's eyes drifted over to Adalei, "I was surprised." She began, "that's all." She looked back at Alix and smiled.

"So was I."

"You were?" Gabrielle inquired, her head turned slightly.

"Well, when I first met you, I assumed that..." Alix paused, reconsidering her next words, "What I mean is, I was a bit surprised to discover that you and Xena aren't… um… _together_." Alix tactfully replied. "It was puzzling at first." She laughed lightly. "I kept waiting for Xena or you to confirm the relationship, but when it never happened, I figured out that there wasn't one."

Gabrielle could not object. It was a logical notion. It was justified, even if inaccurate. Gabrielle was quiet for several moments, but then decided she would open up to her new friend.

"I do have a relationship with Xena, it just isn't an easy one to explain. We don't fit neatly into any box. We're friends, and yet, I know I love her more than anyone. Not that you can't love friends, but... it's more than just a friendship." Gabrielle sighed deeply, "There are times that I am willing to sacrifice so much, just to keep her. And there are times I need her to be with me, because I simply cannot stand the thought of being without her. I know it must sound silly, but when we are forced to spend days or weeks apart, I don't sleep well. I don't feel like myself; I'm never content again until she returns."

"That doesn't sound silly, Gabrielle. It sounds like love." Alix smiled.

Gabrielle nodded, "I do love her, but…"

"Don't try too hard to explain it." Alix interrupted, "It's better that you appreciate what you have with Xena, rather than worry about how you'll define it someone."

Gabrielle quicky realized she was trying to reveal too much about herself and her feelings towards Xena. Feeling a bit too exposed, and a little embarrassed, she decided to turn the conversation back to Alix; she cleared her throat, "Anyway, Xena says I should have picked up on you and Adalei on my own; that the signs were obvious. But to me, they weren't so clear."

"Of course not." Alix agreed. "I'd be just as uncertain as you were, given the situation was reversed. Besides, Xena had an advantage. She's known me longer. She's aware of my history. There was noting for her to really pick up on, it was all sort of neatly put together for her."

Gabrielle examined her friend's words carefully before asking, "Are you saying that Xena has always known that you prefer women?"

Alix laughed, "I imagine it would have been quite impossible for her not to know. We spent some time getting to know one another better before the battle in Gaul, not much time, mind you, but a couple of weeks or so; just enough for our armies to train together and for us to discuss military tactics. Occasionally, she would be in the mood to share one of her stories with me. Most were about war and conquest, but a few were about love. Back then I hadn't been very… ahh… well, I hadn't had much _experience, _as one might say. Xena offered a few opinions on the matter. I admit, I was a bit hesitant to take any advice from her at first, but it turned out to be useful guidance. Even her dark side knew a tad of romance, I suppose. She definitely had quite a bit of knowledge about the topic."

Gabrielle felt as if her entire body had just been dropped from atop Mt. Olympus. Surely, she was misunderstanding Alixandriah's true meaning. She seemed to suggest that Xena had had previous sexual encounters with other women, but never had Xena spoken to Gabrielle about anything of that nature.

"So, as you can imagine, "Alix continued, "It was almost natural to assume that you two were together. Especially, when I found you in bed with her in Athens." Alix paused and thought for a moment, "That one, actually, is still rather confusing." She teased. Noticing the bard's paleness and look of discomfort, Alixandriah's tone shifted, "Are you all right?"

Honestly, Gabrielle felt as if she could vomit or perhaps cry. Ideally, she would cry while she vomited, but she managed to hold herself together long enough to respond, "I don't feel well. Excuse me." Gabrielle stood to her feet.

Alix stood with her, "What's wrong? Is there something I can get you?"

"No…" Gabrielle held out her hand, "You've given me more than enough." Gabrielle slowly began walking away.

"Gabrielle…" Alix reached out for the woman, "Hold on… What's the matter?" Alix's eyes widened as she realized what she had done, "By the Gods... She's told you nothing?" The long silence between them provided confirmation. "I'm sorry… I assumed she told you..." Alix hung her head, "I feel like such a fool. I shouldn't have said anything." Alix shook her head regretfully, silently damning herself for her blunder. A tear escaped Gabrielle's eye, and trickled down her face. Alix felt an immense surge of guilt charge through her body; her ill decision to speak openly with Gabrielle in hopes of clarifying any misunderstanding, had only led to a larger problem.

"Please, don't apologize." Gabrielle sniffled. She wiped at her nose and eyes, "You've done nothing wrong. I don't know what's wrong with me. I don't even know why I care about any of it. She's kept it hidden for a reason, I should respect that."

Alix stepped towards the woman, touching her shoulder gently. Though she had accepted their relationship with no questions, and had not concerned herself with it's true nature any longer, she could see now that there was more to Gabrielle's feelings than met the eye. What appeared a bit blurry and out of focus at first, was now becoming vividly clear. Gabrielle had been settling for friendship, though her heart ached for so much more. More importantly, she had been kept unaware of Xena's past relationships with other women. Evidentially, Xena had built barriers within her relationship with Gabrielle, barriers that Alix had just torn down.

"Gabrielle, it's all right." Alix replied softly. "I'm sure Xena has found it hard to discuss her past. You know that she tries to leave as much of it behind as possible. If you just talk to her, I 'm certain—"

Gabrielle shook her head, "No…" she whispered, "No… Please, Alix, don't mention this to her." Gabrielle begged. "I don't want her to know that this conversation ever happened."

In an attempt to show sincerity, Alix took Gabrielle's hand in her own, "Of course."

Though the moment between them was as delicate as it was sensitive, Alix was still not fully prepared when Gabrielle fell into her arms. Alix held the sobbing woman for an amount of time that can only be described as the feeling of an eternity passing by in only a matter of minutes. When Gabrielle finally pulled away, Alix beheld the heartache upon her face, and knew she had assisted in placing it there. Truthfully, the heartache had been building in Gabrielle for a while now; she had slowly been losing her ability to not let her emotions affect her. Though Alix may have tipped the scales, she wasn't responsible for Gabrielle's breakdown; it had been brewing for quite some time.

"If you need or want to talk… or if you don't…" Alix added quickly, "I'm here. I'll listen… or I won't…" she smiled, hoping to offer some additional comfort to her friend.

"I think I'll go for a walk." Gabrielle suggested, pulling herself together.

"Walks are good." Alix agreed, "They allow time for thinking… clearing the mind…" Gabrielle grabbed her pack and began to head out of the campsite. Suddenly, A fear struck Alixandriah, "Gabrielle…" She called, causing the bard to turn back, "Be back before dark, all right?" She waited for the woman's comply and when she didn't receive it, she enforced her statement, "I'd rather not spend my night trying to find you in the darkness of the forest."

**(II)**

Not long after Gabrielle left the campsite, Xena returned from an enormously profitable hunt: a rabbit, a pheasant, fresh apples, and a wide selection of nuts and berries, just for good measure.

"Xena, where on earth did you find all of this food?" Alix asked, her eyes widening.

"It's all around us. You just have to know where to look." Xena replied, "I wasn't sure what Adalei would be in the mood for, so I just brought back a little of everything. We can always save what we don't eat for tomorrow."

"She enjoys all of these things, especially fresh fruit and nuts." Alix smiled, "You shouldn't have gone to so much trouble though." Alix took the rabbit, and immediately began preparing it for the fire.

"No trouble." Xena returned the smile. She glanced around the campsite, noticing the lack of Gabrielle's presence, "Did Gabrielle come by here?"

"She came by a little while ago." Alix replied, not looking up from her work. "She mentioned taking a walk."

"A walk?" Xena repeated." Did she say when she'd be back?"

"No, but I did suggest for her to be back before dark." Alix wiped at her brow and glanced up at Xena, "Is there something wrong?"

'No…" Xena answered, "I just don't like her wandering her around for very long on her own."

"Oh, I don't know. She seems pretty capable of taking care of herself. She's rather vicious with that stick." Alix laughed lightly, "It's quite a sight, you know, a small woman with a large stick putting a fully armored Roman soldier on his back."

"Gabrielle has impressive combat skills, but she's not a warrior. She doesn't have all the instincts of a warrior." Xena grabbed the pheasant for preparation, and sat down beside Alix. Together, the two women prepared the food; within a short amount of time, their dinner was roasting steadily over the fire.

"She looks more like she's asleep now… instead of dead." Xena pointed out, as she glanced over at Adalei.

Alix nodded, "Her breathing is stronger as well. Before, I had to listen closely and even then, it was so shallow that I questioned it, but now I can see her chest rise and fall with air."

Xena watched carefully, and saw that Alix was correct. The sun was beginning to set, and the food was nearly done cooking. Xena knew it was just a matter of minutes before Adalei would begin to stir, but she did not have the same confidence in Gabrielle's safe return. She grabbed her blade, and began sharpening it.

Alix glanced over at the warrior, "What are you doing?" she asked casually.

"Sharpening my sword."

"Well, I can see that. Is there a reason why?"

Xena sighed and halted the rhythm of her whetstone, "It's late; Gabrielle hasn't returned."

"I'm sure she's on her way back to the camp right now." Alix remarked, "She just needs some time on her own."

"How do you know what she needs?" Her icy tone penetrated through the cool evening air.

"It's been a hectic last few days, don't you think?" Alix asked; she moved closer to the warrior, "It's enough to make anyone feel a little out of sorts with themselves. You not telling her about Adalei and me also shook things up quite a bit."

Xena's eyes shot up towards Alix, "What did she say to you?"

"She didn't have to say anything, Xena. It was written all over her face. The poor girl was completely caught off guard when she realized that Adalei and I are lovers. I blame myself equally though, I could have easily told her on my own. Unfortunately, I assumed you would tell her." Alix scoffed, "Gods, have I learned to stop assuming anything."

"I should have told her." Xena went back to sharpening her sword. "She took off because she's angry at me for it."

"She'll be fine. She just needs some time to let everything sink in. A lot has happened today."

"I'm going to look for her." Satisfied with the sharpness of her blade, Xena stood to her feet and slid her sword into its sheath. "I'm sure she's left an easy enough trail to follow."

Movement in the nearby bushes caught both warriors' attention. In unison, they turned towards the noise, each ready to draw their blade if necessary.

"Gabrielle." Xena called, "For Zeus' sake, I was about to come looking for you." She relaxed her posture.

"I was back before dark." Gabrielle noted, "Isn't that what you expected of me?" her eyes drifted over to Alix.

Alix felt the heaviness of her gaze, and immediately stood to Gabrielle's defense, "Of course." Alix agreed, "I was just telling Xena that you'd be back soon."

Satisfied with this answer, Gabrielle crossed the campsite towards her bedroll. Xena followed close behind.

"Gabrielle, I was worried about you. I wish you wouldn't take off on your own for hours. Especially, in strange places… and even more so when I know you're upset."

Gabrielle turned quickly, facing the larger woman, "I didn't go far, Xena. I remained close to the campsite the entire time."

"I just wish you would talk to me instead of leaving when you're angry."

Gabrielle shook her head, "Xena, I need my space just as much as anyone else. Sometimes, I simply don't want to talk anymore. You of all people should understand that, you take off for entire days and I have no idea where you are."

"Yes, but I always make sure you know that I'm leaving; I make sure that you're safe first, before I go." Xena defended.

Gabrielle laughed quickly, "Are you saying I should have made sure you were safe before I went for my walk?"

"No." Xena stepped back, her face scrunched together from aggravation. "Look, you know what I mean." Xena's voice softened, "Gabrielle, if something happened to you, I couldn't forgive myself."

"Forgive yourself?" Gabrielle repeated harshly, "Forgive yourself for what, Xena? Allowing me to take a walk on my own? Allowing me to feel upset over something?"

"Please, stop twisting my words." Xena begged, "I was wrong to not tell you about Alix. I'm sorry; I promise that I'll not keep something like that from you again."

"And what else have you kept from me, Xena?" Gabrielle asked, her eyes piercing the darkness, as they glowed from the light of the fire.

"I'm not sure what you mean." Xena proceeded with caution, "There are lots of things I have never told you, but I have always tried to tell you what I feel is important."

There it was, as clear as a bell. Xena only told Gabrielle what she felt was important for Gabrielle to know. Therefore, if Xena had been with women in the past, she didn't feel that Gabrielle needed to know about it. Gabrielle sighed, and hung her head. She wanted to be angry with Xena, she wanted to be furious, but deep down she knew that Xena had a right to her privacy and that past love interests were really none of Gabrielle's concern. Yet, Gabrielle could not help but feel rejected in some way. Her walk had helped her gather her thoughts, but nothing seemed very clear to her at the moment; only, that Xena kept secrets about her past.

A cough and a groan echoed throughout the campsite. Alix quickly stepped to Adalei's side, crouching near the woman, "Addie?" she asked, searching the woman's face for any expression. Gradually, Adalei began to awaken. Her eyes slowly opened as she whispered out Alixandriah's name. "I'm right here." Alix reassured, grabbing her lover's hand and holding it close to her heart. She used her free hand to push back a few strands of hair from Adalei's face.

Adalei slowly focused on her surroundings. Her first thought was the Roman soldiers, but she didn't see them anywhere. Alix was beside her, and they appeared to be safe, so she relaxed her body as she continued to gather her thoughts. "Where are we?" she breathed, her voice cracking in the cool air.

"We're safe." Alix smiled, "We're with friends." Gabrielle stepped towards the woman whom she was more eager to meet now than ever. "This is Gabrielle." Alix introduced, "She's a friends of Xena's."

"Xena…" Adalei repeated nervously, "The soldiers… she…"

"She helped me rescue you." Alix gently interrupted. "What you saw was a trick. Just an act to help save you."

Xena stepped forward, "The dart that I shot you with, it had poison in it. It makes you appear dead by slowing down your body. We used it to convince the soldiers you were no longer alive or of any value."

"I feel like I've been asleep for weeks." Adalei slowly tried to sit up, and with Alix's assistance, she was able to. Alix held her close, unsure if she could maintain the position on her own.

"You've been very far under." Xena reported, "You'll be groggy for a while, but you'll feel perfectly normal again soon."

Adalei turned towards Alix and wrapped her arms tightly around the woman's neck, "I love you." She spoke softly.

Gabrielle's heart warmed at the sight, and for a short while, she had forgotten her own troubles. What mattered most at the moment was that Adalei had awoken, and she had been reunited with Alix.

Both women held the embrace, and it lasted for a while before Alix finally pulled away, "Did they hurt you?" It was easy to sense the apprehension in Alix's voice as she asked the question.

"No." Adalei answered simply, "Just a few scratches and bruises."

"That's all?"

Adalei nodded, "That's all." She repeated softly.

Alix pulled the woman into an embrace again, "I prayed to the Gods to keep you safe. For once, it seems they've listened."

Slowly, Adalei regained her strength. She didn't eat much for dinner. She picked at the rabbit, and found the nuts and fruit most satisfying. Truthfully, she lacked any real appetite, but Xena assured her it would return in a day or two. Adalei found it challenging to hold a conversation. She was still disoriented from the poison, and though she had been out cold for hours, she felt exhausted. Her body ached for rest and time to heal itself.

"I think I'll clean up camp and call it an early night." Xena announced after she had finished eating. "We could all use the extra rest."

"I agree." Alix replied, "Though I probably won't sleep much." She glimpsed over at Adalei and smiled, "I'll find it very temping to stay awake and know that you are by my side."

"Alixandriah…" Adalei blushed, "You can sleep and know that I am there as well."

"It's not the same. I can't appreciate you as much if I am sleeping." She reached over and kissed her partner gently on the cheek. Adalei smiled at the gesture. She leaned her head against Alix's chest, and within a short time she had drifted off back to sleep.

"She'll be more alert tomorrow." Xena assured.

Alix gently nudged Adalei, waking her only long enough to lead her to their bedroll and help her settle down for the night. Xena began cleaning up the campsite, as Gabrielle pulled out her quill and scroll once more. After Xena had finished cleaning up, she cautiously approached the bard.

"Are you tired?"

"A little." Gabrielle remarked, her eyes not lifting from the scroll.

"May I sit with you?" Xena asked sincerely.

"I'd really like to finish my writing before I go to bed." Gabrielle replied.

Xena was hesitant to reply, but then squatted next to the blonde, "I won't interrupt you. I'd just like to sit, if that's okay."

Gabrielle exhaled deeply, and scooted over on her bedroll allowing Xena enough room to sit next to her. "I'm not writing about today, if that's what you're wondering."

"All right." Xena replied as she settled herself beside her friend. She pulled out a small knife, and began whittling on a stick she had picked up off the ground. A few minutes went by, and finally Gabrielle's curiosity got the best of her as she asked Xena what she was planning to make from the piece of wood. "A whistle." Xena answered.

"Why are you making a whistle?"

Xena shrugged, "Why not? It could come in useful some day."

Not impressed by the answer, but not interested enough to care, Gabrielle went back to writing in her scrolls. Several more minutes passed by before she caught herself distracted by Xena a second time. Xena had finished the whistle, and was now blowing into its tip, attempting to get some sort of sound to escape.

"Xena, please, that's very annoying." Gabrielle scolded, "Besides, others are trying to sleep."

"What good is my whistle if it doesn't make a sound?" Xena asked and blew on the tip once more with even more force.

"You can perfect it tomorrow, all right?" Gabrielle replied, "Let it be for tonight."

Xena raised the whistle to her mouth once more, but Gabrielle's hand quickly grabbed Xena's arm and shoved it back down. She cast Xena a look of warning, but all the while was she desperately trying to hold back a smile. "Give me the stick."

"It's a whistle." Xena corrected.

"Not yet it isn't." Gabrielle countered, "Until it makes a noise other than deflecting your exasperating breaths, it's a stick."

"I'm not giving it to you."

"Xena…" Gabrielle's tone hardened.

"Gabrielle, I'm not giving you my whistle."

Unable to hold it back any longer, Gabrielle let a small laugh escape her body, "I swear, sometimes you can be so…."

"What?" Xena asked, her eyes opening wider as she awaited the bard's playful remark.

Gabrielle lowered her head and smiled, "Clever."

"_Clever_?" Xena repeated unexpectedly.

"You've planned this all along." Gabrielle insisted, "This is nothing but a ruse to warm back up to me and make me forget that I was angry with you in the first place."

"So, it's working?" Xena asked seriously.

Gabrielle snatched the whistle out of Xena's hand and threw it into the bushes, "Yes, it worked." She smirked.

"Good. I had absolutely no use for that damn thing." Xena moved a little closer to Gabrielle, now that the tension had eased between them, "I don't enjoy your cold shoulder, you know." Gabrielle felt her walls slowly beginning to come down, and she knew that Xena was eventually going to work her way back in; she had a way of doing it every time. "I'm not saying I didn't deserve it, I just don't like when it happens."

"You didn't deserve it, Xena." Gabrielle placed her scroll and quill to the side. "Just because I'm upset, doesn't mean I should punish you for it. I'm sorry."

"No, if I do something to upset you, I want you to let me know." Xena took Gabrielle's hand in her own, causing Gabrielle's heart to beat faster. She quickly tried to mask her emotions, "Gabrielle, I've learned so much from you. You've shown me how to be a better person. I value your feelings… your opinions…"

Feeling a wave of heat rush to her face, Gabrielle looked way from the warrior, "Xena, let's just forget about it. There's no need to dwell."

Xena released the bard's hand, "All right." She whispered softly.

"I'm not angry." She added.

Xena sat there for a moment, waiting for Gabrielle's gaze to return. When it didn't, she reached out to the woman, tenderly stroking the back of her head. Gabrielle's breathing became heavier, and she finally did glance back to the warrior only to find concern and compassion in her eyes. Though Xena may not have loved Gabrielle the way she had loved women in her past, there was no doubt she loved Gabrielle in some way. Love, in any form, should never be disregarded or taken for granted.

"I love you, Xena." The words flowed from Gabrielle's mouth effortlessly. It was a statement she had made a hundred times before, and each time it had remained just as true as the time before.

"I love you." Xena smiled and pulled the smaller woman in closer to her. They sat that way for a while, with Xena's arms wrapped warmly around the bard. Gabrielle rested her head near Xena's chest, and found peace in the soothing sound of Xena's steady heartbeat. It was a moment so tender between them that Gabrielle could never imagine jeopardizing it. She couldn't bear to lose what she had with Xena, whatever it was; it was far too precious. After a while, the fire had died down and the cool weather was beginning to chill the two women. Reluctantly, Xena stood from the bedroll and threw a couple more pieces of wood onto the fire. Quickly, she reached for an extra fur from her own bedroll and then returned to Gabrielle. Gabrielle knew that this meant Xena intended for them to share her bedroll, and try though she might, this was an offer Gabrielle simply could not refuse.

As the two women became comfortable and warm under the covers, Gabrielle was careful not to touch Xena in any way, nor show any signs of affection. If any affectionate action should be taken between them, it would be Xena's doing. Gabrielle thought it best not to confuse things more than they already were, and to let Xena do, as she felt best. Not surprisingly, within only a few minutes, Xena's arm delicately found its way across Gabrielle's waist. At first, Gabrielle's body tensed, but soon after, Xena pulled her closer and their bodies touched. The extra warmth it provided was noticeable, but Gabrielle's body was already set ablaze. She relaxed her muscles and gradually allowed herself to melt into the warrior. She felt Xena's grip tighten. She held the warriors hand close to her chest, and occasionally would stroke it with her fingers. She laid this way for quite a while, before finally turning and facing Xena. Expecting Xena to either be asleep, or very near it, she was surprised to see that not only was Xena fully awake, but her eyes were open as well.

"I thought you had fallen asleep." Gabrielle stated a bit timidly. Xena, whose arm was still wrapped around the bard, only smiled. "I'm glad you're awake."

"I was thinking." Xena replied.

"About what?"

"Alix and Adalei." Xena's tone changed, but Gabrielle wasn't quite sure of its meaning.

"What about them?" She asked, filling a knot tie in her stomach.

Xena didn't reply immediately, she thought for a moment first, "They seem very happy. Very well fit for each other."

Gabrielle had to agree; she thought the same and she found it interesting that Xena had made such an observation. Where Xena was going with this, however, was uncertain. Gabrielle suddenly realized that perhaps the reason Xena had never opened up about her past relationships was because Gabrielle had never bothered to ask. Seeing a window of opportunity, Gabrielle mustered the courage to inquire about Xena's private life.

"Do you find it odd that they fit so well together, yet they are both women?"

"No." Xena replied simply, "That's probably a reason why they do fit so well." She smirked.

Gabrielle felt a flood of relief run through her body. This was going to be easier than she had expected. "When you fought beside Alix in Gaul, did you not know then?"

"You mean did I know that she preferred women?" Xena asked.

"Yes."

"I did." Xena answered honestly. "I suppose that's why it was easy to figure out her relationship with Adalei."

Gabrielle laughed lightly, "Yeah, that would make it a bit easier for you, wouldn't it?"

Xena licked her lips quickly, "Gabrielle, I know I've said it many times now, but I just want to say once more how sorry I am. I realize now more than ever that I should have just told you. I had knowledge that you didn't, and then I tried to make you feel like a fool for not catching on as I did. I don't blame you for being upset with me."

"I don't care anymore." Gabrielle smiled and cuddled closer to the warrior. She laid her head under Xena's chin. "What about you?" she asked in a voice so low, that Xena barely made out the words.

"What about me?"

"Have you ever…" Gabrielle paused, realizing the words refused to come. The actual question itself was harder to ask than she had anticipated. Luckily, she didn't have to finish the sentence, Xena had already figured out what she was asking.

"Gabrielle…" Xena separated herself from the younger woman, and held her at distance so that she could look her in the eye, "I'm not proud of every decision I've made, especially from my past."

"Xena, there's no reason to be ashamed." Gabrielle replied, her eyes softening.

"I leave certain parts of my past exactly where they are, because I'm better off without them."

Gabrielle suddenly saw their conversation drifting away, "Xena, listen to me." Gabrielle emphasized, "No one is going to judge you for who you love. Love is such a wonderful thing. You shouldn't have to hide it no matter what form it comes in."

Xena narrowed her eyes, "Gabrielle, I don't think you understand. I've never loved another woman." Gabrielle's eyes fluttered back and forth as she waited for Xena to explain more. "What I did was exploitation."

"You're right. I don't understand." Gabrielle swallowed heavily.

"I used them, Gabrielle." Xena clarified. "I did whatever I had to, to get what I wanted or needed from them. I tricked them. I lied to them. If it would somehow benefit me, I would make them think I had fallen in love with them. I acted out the entire part, but it was never sincere. I'm not proud of it."

"But you wouldn't do that now." A single tear escaped Gabrielle's eye and rolled down her cheek.

Xena wiped the tear away, "No, I wouldn't. That's why I leave it in the past." Xena sighed, "I'm not sure what Alix has told you, but clearly, she's told you something. I'm sure she meant no harm, but I wish she would be more careful about what she shares."

"Xena, I know your past is full of mistakes and regrets, but I'm not worried about what you did back then. I worry about what you do now, and what you'll continue to do in the future." Gabrielle moved closer to the woman, prompting Xena to take her back into her arms, "I don't want you feel ashamed. I just want you to be happy."

"I am happy, Gabrielle." Xena kissed the top of Gabrielle's head. "I'm the happiest I have ever been."

Gabrielle wanted to push further, but the timing felt wrong and the day had already been filled with enough excitement and emotion. For now, she would be content to lie in Xena's arms and know that Xena wanted her there.


	6. VI

_A/N: First, I want to apologize for the delay in updating. As expected, life has been hectic and has gotten in the way of my writing, but I'm predicting a better future. Thanks for all the great reviews! I'm really happy that this story is being well received among readers. As for this chapter, I want to incorporate Adalei more, so you can get to know her a bit better. Now that Gabrielle has figured out Xena's secret, there's no turning back. Emotions can only become more powerful when combined with knowledge like that. _

**Anchored**

**(I) **

The next morning, Gabrielle awoke to the sounds of laughter. She leaned up from her bedroll to find Xena gone, and Alix and Adalei chatting cheerfully by the fire.

"Alixandriah, I can't believe you'd do such a thing!" Adalei remarked as she sipped on the tea Xena had made for her earlier that morning. "What on earth would posses you to fish without a pole?"

"I'm telling you, Xena made it look easy." Alix defended, though she was laughing at herself as well. "You must watch her sometime."

Adalei glanced at her partner's stitched knee, "Will you be eager to try again soon?"

Alix smirked, "Perhaps. Would it impress you?"

"You would risk cutting open your other leg?" Adalei teased, "Just for a chance to impress me?"

"The one is worth is the other…" Alix leaned over and placed a gentle kiss on Adalei's lips. She pulled away slowly, allowing them both time to absorb the moment. "By the Gods, I've missed you." Alix whispered, as she leaned forward once more, greeting her Adalei's soft lips with her own.

Becoming uncomfortable, Gabrielle quickly hid her face under her furs and hoped that neither woman had realized she was awake. She was relieved to hear the sounds of Argo trotting up to the campsite, indicating that Xena had returned. She waited until she heard Xena's voice, before she rose once more from her bedroll.

"How long before the messenger reaches Caesar?" Adalei asked.

"A couple of days." Xena replied, tying the now well fed and watered Argo to a nearby tree.

"And what if Caesar doesn't believe it? What if he doesn't trust that I am truly dead?"

"Then you'll be in the same position as before they kidnapped you in Athens." Xena replied simply.

"See. Xena has it all figured out." Alix laughed, nudging at her lover. When she didn't receive a similar lighthearted response, her tone changed, "Addie, you'll be safe, no matter what Caesar believes. I promise you."

"It's true." Gabrielle chimed in, presenting to everyone that she was now fully awake, "You couldn't be in safer hands." She glanced up at Xena and smiled.

"I'm very thankful for everything you've done." Adalei added, "Please excuse me if I have come across as ungrateful; I'm not. It's only that I have dealt with Caesar many times before, and he has never been easily out foxed."

"We've all dealt with Caesar more than once." Alix reminded, "And yes, the bastard has a lucky streak…" she frowned.

"How are you feeling today?" Xena asked. Her question deviated onto a more immediate topic.

"Much better."

"Well enough to travel?"

"I suppose."

"Why should we travel, Xena?" Gabrielle asked. "I thought the plan was to lay low for a while?"

"We need to put more distance between us and Caesar." Xena replied, "At least for a while."

"Turning back towards Athens would be pointless." Alix reminded, "We're sure to be spotted there. Actually, all of Greece is dangerous."

"Britannia and Gaul are just as bad." Adalei added. "Caesar would expect to find me in refuge there… if I was alive."

"What about Egypt?" suggested the bard, "Caesar rarely travels there during the colder weather."

Xena pondered the idea for a moment, "I don't think Egypt is the safest."

"Where did you have in mind?" Alix asked the warrior.

"We could go north for the winter. It would be much colder than we're used to here, but Rome's Empire is not as powerful in the north."

"How far north?" Gabrielle inquired eagerly.

"Imagine as far north as Britannia, only towards the east." Xena paused for a moment, "I've heard it referred to as Germania."

"Germania?" Alix scoffed, "Xena, there are nothing but barbarians up there."

"They say the same about Gaul and Britannia."

"If it's the safest place, then I think we should go. I don't mind a colder winter." Adalei replied, "I'll do whatever you think is best, Xena."

Alix turned her head quickly and stared at the younger woman, "What about what I think is best?" She asked.

"You haven't mentioned what you think is best." Adalei countered. "What is your suggestion?"

Alix hesitated, realizing she had no answer prepared, "I haven't thought of one, yet; but surely there's a better place than Germania."

"The Empire stretches farther than you realize." Gabrielle slowly stood from her bedroll, "Caesar's power weakens the farther north we go. It's the logical choice."

Xena confirmed, "If we head east or west, we're still well within the Empire. If we retreat to the south, we face the sea, and then the first land we meet will belong to the Empire. If we go north, we'll eventually run into the tribal lands of Germania, where Caesar's control is limited."

"And what if these tribal land dwellers wish to murder us all for trespassing?" Alixandriah folded her arms.

"If we're careful, we won't upset them. They'll have no reason to attack unless we give them one." Xena explained. "They're not as vicious as legend makes them out to be."

"So, you don't believe Caesar will think she's dead?" Alix stood to her feet now as well. "We need to hide?"

"I believe if a messenger or spy sees Adalei alive and well with us, then Caesar will not have to wonder." Xena answered.

"I agree. Our story will be much more believable if there is no sign of us within the Empire." Gabrielle stepped towards Alix; she placed her hand on her arm to show support, "Think of it as a chance to relax for a few months and an opportunity to visit some place new."

Alix breathed in deeply, "All right. If everyone truly believes it's for the best." She threw her hand up into the air as if to wave Gabrielle away, "Germania…" She mumbled on her way to pack her bedroll, "There's a reason Caesar's control is limited there, you know… bunch of cannibals. Probably try to make breakfast out of us as soon as we get there…"

"Alixandriah." Adalei scolded, "If you do not rid yourself of that cynical attitude, you'll be the first one on their dinner plates."

**(II)**

Within a short while, everyone was packed and ready to leave the campsite. Adalei's strength was limited, so for today, she would ride behind Alix, but perhaps tomorrow, or soon after, she could ride the young mare on her own. In the mean time, the mare made for an excellent pack mule. Xena poured water onto their fire, extinguishing the last of the glowing embers.

"We'll need to buy supplies for winter." Xena announced as she mounted Argo. "It will be best to wait until we are farther north. The markets there will be more equipped with what we need." She pulled Gabrielle up onto Argo and began trotting away from the campsite.

"Why did she mention that?" Adalei asked in a whisper-like tone.

"She's letting us know we're not stopping in any towns or cities for a while." Alix replied in a similar tone. "Just as well; we want to avoid being seen by anyone who may report us to Caesar." Alix gently kicked her horse, and the two followed after Xena, the mare tethered closely behind.

The four women rode for hours at a steady pace, nothing too demanding, but a good rate to cover large amounts of land. They stopped occasionally to break, and allow the horses an opportunity to rest. As the sky grew darker, and the temperature colder, Xena began searching for an appropriate area to set up camp, but as time went on, she had discovered no such place.

"Xena, I don't mean to complain, but if I don't get off this horse soon…"

"I know, Gabrielle." Xena interrupted, "I'm trying to find somewhere. There hasn't been a large clearing along this road, yet."

"You mean you don't have one already mapped out?" Gabrielle asked surprised. "You always know of some place to make camp."

"I did a few miles back, but I decided to keep pushing while we had daylight." Xena sighed, "We may have to head to the cliffs."

"The cliffs?" Gabrielle repeated in disgust. "Xena, it will be the middle of the night before we reach the cliffs. Surely, there must be a large enough clearing around here somewhere."

"Well, when you spot it, Gabrielle, please be sure to let the rest of us know." Xena snapped. Gabrielle recoiled and immediately hushed. She leaned back on Argo, away from her warrior. "I'm sorry." Xena frowned, "I didn't mean for that to sound so harsh."

Suddenly, Alix appeared on the road beside Xena. She whistled to gain Xena's attention, "It's getting late. We need to rest."

"There aren't any clearings." Xena replied. "We may have to head for the cliffs."

Alix laughed lightly, "The cliffs? Xena, be reasonable, let's just camp by the river. There's bound to be countless clearings along the riverbank."

"Which river?" Xena raised one of her eyebrows, and Gabrielle could sense in the tone of her voice, that she was not aware of any nearby water.

"The one this road follows." Alix explained, "You mean you didn't know of it?"

Xena didn't reply. "Come on, I'll show you." Alix gently trotted ahead of Xena, and took off down a side path towards the river. Xena followed cautiously. A few minutes later, Xena heard the gushing sounds of water crashing over rocks. "Here we are!" Alix announced as they came closer to the water. "What do you say, Xena? Good enough for tonight?"

Xena glanced around the riverbank, there was more than enough space to make camp and the river would provide as an excellent source of water and food for the evening; it was more than suitable, it was ideal. "This is good." Xena finally answered.

Alix smiled and then jumped down from her horse. She reached up and helped Adalei down after her. They quickly began setting up camp, as they tried to use what little bit of daylight they had left. Gabrielle built the fire, Alix collected the wood, Adalei tended to the horses, and Xena quickly caught a couple of fish to fry over the fire. Soon, the women were warm and comfortable within their camp. After everyone had eaten, Xena suggested they scout the area, incase anyone else was camped nearby, and to better understand what direction they should take in the morning. Alix agreed and accompanied Xena. Promising their companions they would return soon, Alix and Xena left the campsite.

Finding herself alone with Adalei for the first time, Gabrielle was not sure of what to say to her new friend. She thought for a moment, and then remembered that Alix had told her Adalei enjoyed reading.

"Have you read anything interesting recently?" Gabrielle asked; her voice carried weakly over the campsite.

Adalei smiled, "Not recently. The closest things the soldiers had to literature was a supplies list."

Gabrielle realized the foolishness of her question, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean…" She hesitated, "I shouldn't have phrased it that way."

"It's all right, Gabrielle." Adalei replied warmly. She scooted closer to Gabrielle so they could hear one another better. "I do love to read." She added. "Before I was kidnapped in Athens, I was reading Sappho."

"Sappho!" Gabrielle exclaimed, "Yes, Alix mentioned that you liked Sappho. So do I."

"Alixandriah spoke of me?" Adalei asked.

"Yes. Often." Gabrielle's eye softened, "She adores you."

Adalei blushed, "I adore her." She looked away momentarily, "I knew she would come for me, but I was also afraid she would not succeed." Her glance fell back upon Gabrielle, "I owe so much of my safety to you and Xena."

"We were happy to help." Gabrielle replied, "We knew your mother; we wanted to offer any assistance we could."

Adalei's body tensed at the mentioning of Boudica. She looked away from Gabrielle once more, and this time focused her eyes onto the fire. "My mother and Xena were not friends."

"They were repairing their trust." Gabrielle assured, "Xena planned to fight in the battle of Britannia."

"I'm glad she didn't. She would have died." Adalei's tone hardened, "What sorrow it would have brought to lose two heroic women that day."

"I am deeply sorry about Boudica." Gabrielle reached over, and touched Adalei's arm, "I hold nothing but respect for her in my heart."

"If that is how you remember Boudica, then do not be somber." Adalei smiled, "Be content and proud that you knew her and her cause. I have sadness in my heart for her, but I remember her as more than the warrior queen, I remember her as my mother. One does not forget the warmth of a mother's touch, nor will one's heart forget the pain that accompanies her death."

"I cannot imagine the pain of losing a mother." Gabrielle hung her head.

"I have lost more than my mother." Adalei sighed, "I have lost my entire family."

Gabrielle's eyes slowly lifted, "There's no one left?"

Adalei shook her head, "Only myself." She glanced down at her lap and then muttered, "But at least I have Alix."

"That's a lot to be thankful for."

"Yes, it is." Adalei smiled, "I could not ask for a better lover. I know of no one more kind or caring, more passionate or brave, more loyal or honest…" She chuckled lightly, realizing she was rambling, "Listen to me, babbling on like a young foolish girl." She paused, "I realize there are other people who have those traits; Xena, for instance. You're lucky to have her. I can only fathom the hero worship that occurs…"

"I care for Xena, but I wouldn't say I worship her." Gabrielle smirked.

"No, of course not, not you." Adalei laughed, "Others. You know, the common folk that you pass by in any random village."

Gabrielle thought for a moment, "It's true. Xena can attract a lot of attention at times. She'd never admit it, but I think she enjoys it, occasionally. It's a reminder that people realize the good work she does."

"May I ask how long you've been lovers?" Adalei pulled her knees into her chest, and folded her arms across them so she could have a rest for her chin.

A look of panic streaked across Gabrielle's face, "Oh, we… we don't…. we're not." Gabrielle laughed nervously, "We're just friends."

Adalei's mouth slightly gaped open, "I see." She finally replied.

"Alix thought the same thing." Gabrielle quickly added, "It's a common mistake."

Adalei nodded, "So it must be. Have you known each other long?"

"A few years."

"A few years…" Adalei distantly repeated, "Is there someone else then? Someone else that your heart belongs to?"

"Not anymore." Gabrielle's tone saddened, "I was married… briefly… very briefly…."

"But at least you know of love. That is something to cherish."

"Yes." Gabrielle answered solemnly, "But even then, it pained me greatly to leave Xena." Gabrielle hadn't planned on revealing that information, she had never told it to anyone, but it had escaped her mouth before much thought was placed behind it. She gazed over at Adalei to gage her response.

"You follow a calling with Xena…" Adalei observed. "My mother called it 'a divine obligation.' You must follow it, because it is the will of the Gods."

Adalei and Gabrielle's conversation was interrupted when Alix and Xena loudly made their entrance back to the campsite. Alix was attempting to tell Xena some story about a crooked salesman in Delphi, but dropped the topic quickly when she realized Xena wasn't actually paying attention.

"Anyway, the point it is, if the price seems to low to be true, it's probably because the item is stolen." Alix concluded. Alix's attention fell onto Adalei, she walked over and bent down behind her. She sensually began to rub Adalei's shoulders. "You did well today." Alix praised, "For someone who came back from the near dead, that is."

Adalei smiled and closed her eyes as she enjoyed the tender massage of her lover, "Do not be fooled, Love; I am exhausted."

"Come. Let's rest. I'll read Sappho to you until you fall asleep." Alix reached down and pulled Adalei to her feet, and then together they crossed the campsite. Adalei had taken the precaution of separating themselves quite a bit from Xena and Gabrielle. Though it wasn't much, they at least now had some privacy and their own separate fire.

Touched by the tender and attentive moment, Gabrielle suddenly found herself yearning for such a commitment. Immediately, she thought of how pleasant it would be if she and Xena could share such an intimate exchange. Gabrielle would adore the opportunity to read some of her favorite literature to Xena, or to even have Xena read some of her own writing. More than anything, Gabrielle had always dreamed of sharing one of her greatest passions with someone special; unfortunately, Xena was the most special person in her life and she had no interest in what Gabrielle was reading or writing.

Xena came over and sat down beside the bard. She removed her armor and warmed herself by the fire. "We covered a lot of ground today." She bragged, "More than I had expected we would."

"Well, if anyone should be good at traveling, it's us."

Xena smiled at Gabrielle's response, "True. We're not settlers."

Gabrielle scooted closer to the warrior, hoping this would prompt Xena to show some sign of affection, "Perhaps we will settle down someday."

"I suppose." Xena laughed, "In fifty years or so."

Gabrielle cast Xena a look, "If I'm still alive in fifty years, I'd like to already be settled somewhere."

"I imagine you'll have your hospice." Xena reminded, "That will keep you tethered.

_Tethered. _Gabrielle thought;_ she makes it sound more like being shackled and imprisoned than settling down into a home. _

Xena spread out her bedroll a few feet away from Gabrielle's, "I don't remember the last time I was this tired." She stated, as she crawled under her furs, trumping any prompt to show Gabrielle the slightest affection. "Are you coming to bed soon?"

Gabrielle glanced at her bedroll, "You mean going to bed…"

"That's what I said." Xena replied a bit perplexed by the bard's response.

"No." Gabrielle corrected, "You said _coming _to bed, which implies that I will be sleeping in the same bed as you. Since I clearly will not be, then that means I am _going_ to my own bed."

"Is this another one of your philosophical things?" Xena asked hesitantly. "Like, what is a boulder but a large pebble, and what is a mountain but several boulders, which are only large pebbles so therefore mountains are pebbles…."

Gabrielle's nose scrunched, "Xena, what in Tartarus are you talking about?"

Xena sighed, "I don't know, you said something similar to that once. Forget it; if you're planning on staying up for a while, make sure the fire doesn't burn out." Xena quickly buried under her furs. "Don't set up all night thinking of new analogies to confuse me with tomorrow." She playfully warned.

_ Don't_ worry; _there are many other confusing thoughts at hand. _Gabrielle heard her inner voice quip. She exhaled heavily and threw a few extra pieces of wood onto the fire before finally retreating to her bedroll. _Perhaps she will come to me in the middle of the night and wish to share my bed. _Gabrielle pondered. _She'll wake up and realize she's cold, and she'll seek my body for warmth. _

A few hours later, the bitter cold night air caused Gabrielle to stir. Freezing, she quickly stoked the fire and built it up again. As she was heading back to her bedroll, she heard the distinct sounds of lovemaking coming from Alix and Adalei's side of camp. As she turned, half expecting she had imagined the sounds, she was surprised to see two shadowy figures moving together in the darkness behind her. As her eyes adjusted, to the dim lighting of the fire, she was able see Alix on top thrusting into Adalei as the smaller woman arched her body in response. Gabrielle allowed her gaze to linger for only a few seconds before she scurried off to her bedroll and pulled her furs over her head. She began counting mentally in her mind, hoping to block out the erotic moans emanating from the darker side of camp. After a safe amount of time, she paused and realized the noises had stopped. Though she was freezing only a few minutes before, she suddenly now felt very warm and her heartbeat was racing. There was no denying she had become aroused by what she accidentally witnessed, even though she felt incredibly ashamed for even partially eavesdropping on Adalei and Alix's privacy. She glanced over at Xena who was still sound asleep. Unable to resist any longer, she pulled Xena's furs back and slid in beside the warrior.

Xena's eyes flickered open, "Gabrielle?" she mumbled.

"I'm cold." Gabrielle quickly replied.

That was a lie. Xena could feel the bard's warm body against hers, but she didn't bother to question it. She scooted over, allowing Gabrielle more room. As Gabrielle snuggled closer, she breathed in Xena's scent; leather, soap, and something else that Gabrielle could never quite pinpoint, but it was distinctly Xena. Feeling herself begin to relax, Gabrielle rested her head on the warrior's chest, and listened closely to the steady rhythm of Xena's heart. She reached over, and wrapped her arm around the warrior's stomach; soon after, the heartbeat quickened. Slowly, Gabrielle allowed her fingers to trace small circles on Xena's stomach, a gesture she often employed when Xena was in need of comfort. Suddenly, the heartbeat was pounding. Gabrielle raised her head, and saw that Xena's eyes were closed.

"Xena? Are you awake?" she asked softly.

Xena's eyes never opened, but she replied in a low voice, "Yes." She swallowed heavily.

Gabrielle rested her head on Xena's chest again, "Have you ever been to Germania?"

"Only once, for a short time." Xena responded.

"And you say it's very cold there?"

"Much colder than here."

Gabrielle was quite for a moment, "Then where will we sleep?"

"We may be able to rent a barn during times of snow, or perhaps even find a hut. I'm not sure what we'll do until we get there. The tribes are willing to trade; they appreciate all goods and coin." Xena's heartbeat began to calm down again as they continued talking. Gabrielle noticed the change, and concluded that though Xena was masking it well, she too felt some sort of excitement or apprehension when they shared an intimate moment of some sort.

"I suggest we sleep like this." Gabrielle contently sighed.

"If we have a shelter, we won't need the extra warmth." Xena casually objected.

Without missing a beat, Gabrielle replied, "Then I'd rather sleep on the snow covered ground."

Once more, the heartbeat quickened.


	7. VII

**A/N: Sorry that it's taken a little longer for an update. I've had a bad head/chest cold, and I still feel a little under the weather. I rushed this chapter along because my head was beginning to ache, so I a apologize if it isn't up to par or if it's covered in typos. I'll proof it in a couple of days and post an edited version. **

**(I)**

Several days passed, and the four women edged closer to Germania. The weather had taken a significant change and it was becoming bitterly apparent just how cold the winter months would be in Germania. Gabrielle had managed to find some peace of mind during the majority of their traveling. The colder weather brought Xena to her bed each night where they fell asleep warmly wrapped in each other's arms. The more she observed the relationship between Alixandriah and Adalei, the more she believed it wasn't that dissimilar from the relationship she shared with Xena.

_So they have sex… _Gabrielle thought, _big deal… Xena and I don't have to have to sex to know that we love each other… take away the sex from Alix and Adalei's relationship and what do you have? You have mine and Xena's relationship, that's what. It's really not that different… By the Gods, Xena even kisses me when she's feeling extra affectionate. Well, we don't kiss exactly the way lovers do, but it's tender and loving nonetheless. I know Xena loves me, and that's enough, right? _

These thoughts, and many more like them, provided Gabrielle with a sense of peace and security, but somewhere underneath it all there was still a fear that her feelings for Xena could not be so easily contained. For now, it wasn't something she had to worry about; everyone had become predominately occupied with reaching Germania in time to set up a shelter before the first snow. Deciding they had gone far enough to now shop the markets, Xena had lead them into a reasonably sized town where they would buy the supplies they needed to finish their journey to Germania and survive the winter.

Gabrielle browsed around in the unique shops, which differed greatly from the ones she had shopped in Greece and Rome. She found odd items that she couldn't imagine a purpose for other than decorating or having some spiritual relevance. A certain piece of jewelry caught her eye; it was a wooden beaded necklace with small designs carved into each individual bead. She held the necklace in her hand for a short while, studying the designs and admiring the craftwork. Suddenly, Alix's voice came from behind her.

"You like that?" Alix asked as she stepped up beside the blonde.

Gabrielle smiled and placed the necklace back on its hook, "I was just admiring the carvings."

Alix picked up the necklace, "Those markings are special, eh? Nothing like I've seen before." Alix waved to the merchant and managed to agree upon a price, even though the merchant and Alix did not speak the same language. After purchasing the necklace, Alix turned and faced Gabrielle, "Lift up your hair and I'll tie it on for you."

Gabrielle's mouth gaped, "Oh, Alix… I-"

"Don't even think about objecting, I just paid seven dinars for this." Alix playfully warned, "Now, lift up your hair." A smile flashed across Gabrielle's face as she whirled around and lifted her hair, exposing her neck to her friend. Alix momentarily admired the lean and toned muscles resting under Gabrielle's skin before latching the necklace. "Turn around and let me see." Alix instructed. Gabrielle did as she was told. "It suits you very well." Alix decided.

"Thank you." Gabrielle touched the necklace with her hand.

"I wanted to get you something… a gift." Alix motioned for Gabrielle to follow her as they walked away from the shop, "I want to get something for Xena as well, but I have been unable to think of anything she would like. What gift does one buy for the warrior princess?"

Gabrielle laughed lightly, "Xena isn't really…" she paused as she tried to think of the right word, "… Xena doesn't expect gifts from people. She only wants their gratitude and friendship… their loyalty."

"She already has all of that from me and much more. I've thanked her a dozen times, but I can't help but want to give her a gift. It's a custom among my people to give a gift to someone when they've offered such tremendous help. After what Xena has done for me, I owe her the greatest treasure in the world, but she'll have to settle for something in this market." Alix joked. "I was hoping you would help me. You know Xena much better than I do. Will you pick something out for her? Something will she actually like?"

Gabrielle gazed around the different shops, "Alix, it's hard to know what Xena will like…"

"A weapon perhaps?" Alix suggested.

"You mean something better than her chakram and sword?" Gabrielle's eyebrow lifted.

"Right… Her chakram." Alix's eyes narrowed, "What the hell is a chakram, anyway?"

"I don't know, but there's nothing here that could replace it."

The two women continued walking through the market, "Something for Argo, perhaps? Maybe a new saddle?"

"She's partial to the one she has. It has sentimental value." Gabrielle explained.

"No jewelry, no perfumes, no games or foods or wines…" Alix sighed, "This is dreadfully difficult. How can someone who is so simple be so tricky to please?"

Gabrielle couldn't resist giggling at Alix's question, "That's just it, Alix. She's not tricky to please. It's as simple as not buying her a gift at all; just the return of your friendship and trust is enough. That is the greatest gift one can give to the warrior princess."

"What about that?" Alix pointed, seemingly ignoring Gabrielle's second attempt at hindering her gift giving, "Xena would like that." Alix walked over to a random shop and picked up a backpack. "She'll need something larger with the extra supplies she's buying for winter, and the one she has now is a bit ragged."

"It's practical." Gabrielle noted. "That's the first sign that Xena would like it."

"Yes." Alix smiled, "Xena doesn't keep anything around that isn't useful, eh?" She playfully nudged Gabrielle with her elbow, insinuating that her relationship with Xena was practical as well.

"Ha... Ha…" Gabrielle replied sarcastically. "Are you buying that or not?" she asked, placing her hands on her hips.

"Steady." Alix remarked as the corner of her lip curled into a smirk, "I haven't even negotiated a price, yet."

"Negotiate? Gabrielle mocked, "I'd hardly call what you're doing here in _these _markets negotiating."

"Is that so? You don't think I can bargain with a foreign merchant?"

"Well, you paid seven dinars for this necklace, and I can assure you the merchant made quite the profit from your purchase."

Alix pondered this thought for a moment, "All right. Then I shall make back what I lost on this next purchase." She motioned for the merchant to come near. Gabrielle watched with delightful curiosity to see how Alix intended on bargaining with the merchant. "Price?" Alix asked loudly. "Price?" She repeated again.

"Twenty dinars." The merchant replied easily.

"Twenty dinars? Zeus on Mt. Olympus, that's outrageous!"

Gabrielle suppressed a laugh, "Alix, just forget about it. If you want, I know that Xena needs a small knife for around the campsite…."

"No…" Alix objected, "I'm buying this pack." She stared steadily at the merchant, and then licked her lips before replying in another loud and clear voice, "Ten dinars."

The merchant shook his head and reached for the pack. "Wait, wait, wait!" Alix stepped away, "Fifteen dinars." She quickly suggested. "Fifteen dinars and… and…" She scrambled as she searched for something worth trading, "and this ring." Alix quickly removed a silver ring from her finger and offered it to the merchant, her eyes widened as she anticipated his response. "This ring important… important." She nodded. "Belonged to a queen. _Queen?_" she repeated the words hoping to force their meaning to connect with the merchant.

"Look, lady, it's twenty dinars for the pack." The merchant replied aggressively. "If you want it, pay up. If not, leave my shop, I'm a busy man."

Alix's mouth hung open for a moment, as she realized the merchant was not foreign and had no trouble understanding her language. Gabrielle turned quickly, so that she didn't burst out laughing in front of Alix's face, but it was no secret that Alix had just made a fool of herself.

"Yeah, I'll take it." Alix replied in a lower voice and she threw twenty dinars onto the merchant's table. "Let's go, Giggles." Alix tugged on Gabrielle's arm as they hurriedly exited the shop.

"Alix…" Gabrielle protested as she tried to keep up to her fast moving friend, "You shouldn't have paid that much for the pack. It was overpriced." Gabrielle halted the taller woman, "Come, let's take it back to the merchant and trade it for something else."

"I don't want to trade it. This is what Xena will like. It's worth it." Alix began walking again, "Besides, I can earn back the money when we reach Germania. I'll find work there."

"Let me pay some on the pack then." Gabrielle reached for her money pouch, "It can be a gift from both of us. Zeus knows she's saved my skin a few times."

"Gabrielle, I appreciate what you're trying to do, but it's fine."

Gabrielle sighed, "All right, but this means that the next time I offer you something you have to take it."

"Offer me something? Like what?" Alix asked curiously.

"Like stitching up your knee when you deicide to go fishing with Xena."

Alix nodded, "But I did let you stitch it up."

"Yes, after I knocked you out with a club and tied you to a tree." Gabrielle joked. "You're the most stubborn person I've ever met. And I travel with Xena." She added in a boastful tone.

"I'm more stubborn than Xena… really?" Alix stopped in her tracks and faced the bard.

"I'm just saying, once you have an idea in your head it's very hard to get out of there."

Alix was quiet for a moment as she stared into the bard's eyes. They were gentle and warm; they did not hold any judgment or criticism. She may have been calling Alix stubborn, but she didn't mean it in a negative way, "And is that such a bad thing?"

"No." Gabrielle answered honestly, "It isn't, but it can be a little frustrating to deal with." She tacked on a smile.

"Well, I may have Xena beaten when it comes to being stubborn, but she's definitely winning the race for being oblivious."

Gabrielle's cheery disposition faded as she attempted to make sense of Alix's statement. Realizing she had caused the bard discomfort, Alix immediately apologized, "I'm sorry. I wasn't meaning to offend you, I was just making light of the fact that she…" Alix paused, "… that she doesn't seem to realize what a wonderful woman she has right in front of her. It just seems… so obvious." Alix searched the bard's face for approval.

"Xena isn't interested in women…" Gabrielle's voice was clear and steady, as if she had spent an entire lifetime reaching this conclusion and whole-heartedly believed it.

"Did she tell you that?" Alix asked, her voice lowering.

"What she told you about, Alix, wasn't stories of love. They were stories of conquest. She used those women to gain power, but she never loved them. She never wanted to be with them." Gabrielle swallowed heavily.

"I don't believe that." Alix shifted her weight to one foot as she leaned in closer towards Gabrielle, "I'm sure Xena has exploited many in order to get what she wanted, but she has loved as well. The stories she told me were full of passion, and if she told you otherwise, then she's more of a coward than I thought."

"No, Alix, you're wrong." Gabrielle snapped, "The Xena who told you those stories cannot be held to the truth. She would have lied back then… she wouldn't lie about it now."

"She would if she thought she was somehow protecting you." Alix's word pierced the air between them like a blade.

Unable to deny the truth behind Alix's statement, Gabrielle allowed herself to consider the possibility that Xena had lied about her relations with other women. It wouldn't be unlike Xena to only tell a half-truth, if it meant she could protect Gabrielle from harm. Alixandriah guided herself and the bard out of the marketplace, and found a nearby bench where they could sit and talk with some privacy.

"Gabrielle, it's getting harder for me to stay quiet about this. We've been friends for a little while now, wouldn't you say? Enough for us to feel comfortable around one another. I know you're hurting. I can see it on your face. I see it every time you're around her and part of me despises her for it."

Gabrielle shook her head, "You can't be angry with Xena…"

Alix sighed heavily, "I'm not exactly angry with her…. I just can't stand seeing you hurting from her recklessness. Xena refuses to acknowledge any desire to be your lover, and yet she turns to you each night seeking comfort in your arms and in your presence. She holds you, and then she kisses you, but then in the morning you're only friends…" Alix paused. "Why do you think that is so?"

Gabrielle felt the tears forming in her eyes, but she choked them back. "I don't know." She murmured. "I try not to think about it."

"But you deserve to be loved." Alix reached over and took the bard's hand, "Gods, Gabrielle, if anyone on this earth deserves it the most, it's you."

Gabrielle pulled her hand away, and wiped at her eyes, "She does love me…" she nodded, "Just not the way that I love her."

"Are you certain? Have you asked her? Because I think she does love you the way you love her, and she's either too blind or too afraid to realize she needs to admit it…"

Now the tears will falling from Gabrielle's face freely, and she sniffled as she tried to pull them back, "I can't ask her Alix… I can't bear the thought of her answer being no… I'd lose everything, and I can't risk that." Gabrielle slowly stood from the bench. "I need to go. There are still supplies I should purchase before we leave."

"Gabrielle… wait… please, sit with me a little longer." Alix pleaded. "The supplies can wait."

"I have nothing else to say, Alix. Now, you know everything there is to know about Xena and me. I'm sorry that it bothers you so much."

"Is it wrong to see you hurting and wish for it to stop?"

Gabrielle shook her head, "It's not as simple as you think. You love someone who loves you back exactly the way you want her to. You're so lucky and you don't even know it."

"That's not true, I realize that I am lucky." Alix quickly defended. "Adalei didn't come easily, there were many failed attempts before her. But the point is that I wasn't afraid to try."

"You still don't understand." Gabrielle stressed, "If it can't be Xena, then I don't want it to be anyone else. If she says no, then I'll lose her and I'll be more alone than I have ever been. I'm not willing to risk it."

"Notice that you keep saying, _if _she says no." Alix pointed out, "You're not certain about her feelings…"

"But I am certain about mine." Gabrielle turned quickly and hurried away from the bench, leaving Alixandriah sitting alone with her expensive backpack.

**(II)**

After purchasing all of their supplies, Xena rented two rooms in a nearby inn. She informed the other women that this would be their last chance to stay in an inn until after winter, so they should make the most of it. Frankly, Gabrielle was surprised that Xena was willing to stay in the town, perhaps even she had secretly desired one more night in a real bed before they took refuge in Germania.

"Xena…" Alixandriah called, once she found Xena tending to Argo in the stables. She approached the warrior with the new backpack in hand. "I have something for you."

Xena appeared surprised when Alix handed her the pack, "What is this?" she asked inquisitively.

"A gift. My thank you, for everything you've done." Alix smiled.

"I don't need a gift." Xena reached the pack back to Alix, "You're gratitude is payment enough."

Alix refused the pack, "Xena, you must take it. It's a custom of my people. Besides, you need a larger pack for all of your supplies. Please, take it."

"All right, but no more gifts. I can't have you bringing me packs every time I help you." Xena quickly fumbled through the pack and examined its storage capacity, "This is nice… thank you."

"You're welcome." Alix turned to leave.

"Did you buy that necklace for Gabrielle as well?" Xena asked, catching Alix's attention and causing her turn back around.

"Yes." Alix admitted, "I saw her admiring it at one of the shops."

Xena nodded, "I didn't know she liked jewelry."

"No?" Alix took a step closer, "There's a lot of things about her you should take the time to know."

Xena's eyes shot up at Alix's comment, "I know what I need to know."

"You know what you _want_ to know." Alix corrected.

"You think because you bought her a necklace, you know her better than me?" Xena pierced her lips.

Alix shook her head, "No. She's a beautiful person, Xena. She has so many talents, skills, dreams…" Alix's voice lowered, "And she's yours… appreciate her."

"I do." Xena stated coldly.

"A little more." Alix added. "If you don't, eventually someone else will." She turned and walked quickly back to her room, this time leaving Xena alone with the overpriced pack.

Several minutes later Xena returned to her room and found Gabrielle wrapped warmly under the blankets. She removed her armor, washed up by the water bowl, and slid in carefully beside the bard.

"I wish they had towns in Germania." Gabrielle said sleepily, as she snuggled under the furs. "It would make spending the winter there a little more comfortable."

"There will be villages in some areas." Xena replied.

"Will they be friendly?"

"Some of them will be."

"How will we communicate?"

"I picked up a few words here and there…" Xena turned on her side so that she was facing Gabrielle, "If two people really want to get a point across, they'll find a way." She ended optimistically.

"It's strange. Under any other circumstances I would be scared to death to spend a cold winter in a place like Germania… all the tribes and the barbarians… not knowing where we'll find shelter or if we'll even be welcomed…." Gabrielle reached over and laced her fingers with Xena's, "But as long as it's with you, I have no fear."

Xena smiled faintly from the praise. Her mind had repeated the conversation she had shared with Alix earlier that evening, and try as she might, she wasn't fully able to forget about it. She always thought she had appreciated Gabrielle enough, but had it been?

"Did you like your pack?" Gabrielle asked as she closed her eyes and began to rest.

"Yes. It's very useful. But too expensive."

"Alix insisted on getting it for you." Gabrielle giggled lightly, "I wish you could have seen her trying to bargain with the merchant. It was a sight." Gabrielle sighed contently, "She's a unique combination isn't she? Stubborn, but charming… witty and friendly… she even appreciates literature, though she's a warrior."

"Warriors can't appreciate literature?" Xena asked casually.

"Not many do." Gabrielle answered.

Xena rose up onto one elbow, "You mean I don't…."

Gabrielle's eyes flickered open when she realized she had struck a chord with Xena, "Well…. That's not exactly what I meant, but…"

"But?" Xena pressed.

"Well, Xena, you don't appreciate literature. You never read of the great works and you're never interested in what I'm writing."

"I already know what you're writing. You write about whatever we experience that day."

"There's more to it than just that…" Gabrielle protested, "It's the way I write… the passion and meaning behind the words…. Besides, I don't always write about you, you know. Sometimes I like to write to poetry."

Xena sighed heavily, "Can't we just have our differences? You don't like to fish and hunt, nor do you enjoy drinking mead. I don't force those things on you just because I like them."

Gabrielle now leaned up as well, "Xena, of course we can have our differences. I didn't mean that I wanted to force you to read anything…"

"But you wish that I would?"

Gabrielle suddenly felt that she was being backed into a corner, "I would like for you to, but if you never choose to do so, then that's all right as well."

"You can't have it both ways, Gabrielle. Either you want me to read your writings, or you don't." Xena's voice was quick and colder than usual.

"Xena, why are you acting like this?" Gabrielle reached over and brushed her friend's face with the backs of her fingers. "Is something bothering you?"

Xena pushed Gabrielle's hand away, "Ever since you've met Alix, it's like I suddenly don't do anything right anymore."

"What?" Gabrielle's eyes widened and she scrambled to sit up in the bed, "Xena, that's not true."

"You're always talking about how special she is… how you've never met anyone like her… She's so charming, she's so witty, and her dialect is enjoyable to listen to… You're completely fascinated by the relationship she has with Adalei… you let her buy you jewelry… and now you're telling me that you wish I was more like her." Xena's voice had gotten louder with each accusation.

"Xena, please, keep your voice down. They might hear you." Gabrielle hushed, "What has gotten into you? I would never want you to be anyone than you." The bard's voice softened, "Alix is an interesting person… there are things about her that I like and that I admire… but I don't want you to change, Xena. I love you." Gabrielle swallowed heavily, "I love everything about you."

Xena's eyes batted back and forth as she absorbed Gabrielle's words, but she said nothing. Gabrielle leaned towards the warrior and wrapped her arms around her, holding her tightly. For several minutes they remained this way. Xena felt herself begin to relax and she slowly lowered herself and Gabrielle back onto the bed. Gabrielle rested her head upon Xena's chest and began to trace circles onto Xena's stomach with her finger.

"I'm sorry…" Xena whispered into the darkness. She exhaled heavily, "Alixandriah is a wonderful person… and a true friend. I have no right to criticize your admiration of her. She's done nothing to deserve it."

Gabrielle looked up at the warrior, though the room was dark she could make out the features of her face, "You'll probably laugh at me for saying so, but you seem jealous."

_Jealous._ That was a word that hadn't crossed Xena's mind, but now that Gabrielle had mentioned it, it seemed very accurate. Xena didn't immediately reply, she understood that she must consider the consequences of admitting to such a claim.

"I suppose I am… a little." Xena finally replied.

Gabrielle felt a smile creep onto her face, for this answer secretly pleased her. "Well, you have nothing to worry about it." She reassured. "She may be fascinating, but she'll never take the place of you."

"It's childish of me anyway. It's not like you can't have more than one best friend." Xena replied nonchalantly.

Gabrielle lightly scoffed at the mentioning of best friend. At one time, it would have honored her greatly to be called Xena's best friend, but now it felt demeaning. "Xena, you're more than just a best friend to me. I care for you like I've cared for no one else."

Xena repositioned herself so that she was once again facing Gabrielle, "I understand. I feel it too. It's a bond between us… a bond that feels stronger than any friendship."

Gabrielle's face lit up with delight, "Yes!" She grinned, "It does…"

"You're like my family." Xena continued, "I value you and your life more than my own."

_Finally! _Gabrielle's inner voice exclaimed. _She's finally going to talk about it with me! _"Xena, I never want us to separate." Gabrielle's eyes searched Xena's, and she quickly reached for her hand, "I can't imagine a life without you."

Perhaps Gabrielle had allowed herself to get too caught up in the moment, or perhaps it was the emotional significance behind their conversation, but from somewhere she drew the courage to lean in and place her lips upon Xena's. Immediately, she felt Xena pull away. Gabrielle's first thought was that she had gone too far, that she foolishly acted on a weak moment and now damaged the friendship between them, but though Xena had pulled away, she had remained close to Gabrielle, still holding her in her arms. She didn't seem disgusted or appalled; she seemed remorseful.

"Gabrielle…." Xena whispered painfully, "I can't…" she slowly shook her head, "I can't…"

Gabrielle reached a hand up to Xena's face and cupped her cheek, "Why?" she managed to ask, although her heart was racing and she quickly felt a flood of tears building in her eyes.

"I'll only hurt you." Xena nervously replied.

Gabrielle moved even closer to the warrior, pressing her face against Xena's; it was as physically close as she could get to Xena, and yet, she desired to be even closer, "I'm not afraid, Xena. I trust you with my life; I can trust you with my heart as well."

"No." Xena pulled away from the blonde once more, "You can't." This time, Xena rose from the bed.

Gabrielle instantly sat up as well, "I don't understand…"

Xena lowered her head, "Gabrielle, I can't give you what you want… I have to be prepared to sacrifice everything for the greater good, and I'm not willing to sacrifice you."

Gabrielle felt more confused than ever, "Are you saying that we can never be more than this because eventually I'll only get in the way of what you need to do?"

"No… I'm saying that if my destiny leads me to my death, I don't want you to get hurt in the process."

"Xena, I think I've already signed up for that…" Tears fell steadily from her face. She wiped at them quickly.

"It will only hurt more if we…." Xena didn't finish; instead, she swallowed back the words and looked away from Gabrielle.

Gabrielle reached out to the warrior once more, pulling her back towards the bed. Surprisingly, Xena willingly complied, offering no resistance.

"I'm not going to leave you, Xena, and I'm not going to let you leave either." Gabrielle pulled the furs over them. "I love you… it's too late to try to change that."


	8. VIII

**(I)**

"There it is." Xena pointed from atop Argo, "That's the borderland."

"It looks so isolated." Alix replied, as she stared off at the distant mountain ranges.

"We'll have to be careful from now on, the tribes will be watching us. We're on their land, and we must obey their rules." Xena turned on Argo and began heading down the hill, back to where Gabrielle and Adalei were waiting.

Alix's gaze lingered on the foreign land for a few moments longer before she turned and trailed Xena. As they came closer to their companions, the sounds of Adalei's vomiting filled the air, and Alix immediately became concerned. She jumped down from her horse and rushed to Adalei's side.

"Again?" Xena asked as she jumped down from Argo and stepped closer to Gabrielle, who had given up hope on comforting the ill woman.

"That's the third day this week." Gabrielle sighed. "It's strange how it comes and goes… it never lasts all day."

"Sounds like morning sickness." Xena concluded as she watched Alixandriah care for her partner.

Gabrielle laughed lightly, "Well, we know it can't be that…" Xena raised an eyebrow, but didn't respond. Gabrielle caught the look and playfully smacked Xena on the arm, "Xena, don't be silly… how could it possibly be morning sickness? That would mean she's been with a man."

"Yes, that's what it would mean." Xena agreed.

Gabrielle hesitated, "…. do you think one of the soldiers forced himself?"

Xena shrugged, "Only Adalei knows that."

Gabrielle didn't know how to respond to such an accusation. Regardless of how it happened, if it were true that Adalei was with child, it would devastate Alixandriah. Suddenly, Alix turned and walked back towards her friends.

"She's very ill today." Alix explained sympathetically. "She hasn't been able to keep down any food in days. She's getting weaker."

"It would be best to keep traveling so we can reach the borderland by nightfall, but if she is too ill, we can set up camp here tonight, and enter the borderland tomorrow." Xena offered.

"I'm not sure which is best. What if she feels worse tomorrow? Is there anything you can do for her?" Alix's eyes saddened. "I'm not sure what her ailment is… perhaps some reaction to the poison you used to put her under?"

"The poison doesn't cause any such side effects." Xena paused, as she considered offering up the obvious cause, "Her symptoms appear to be normal for a woman who is with child."

Alix's eyes widened, "With child?" she repeated slowly, as if the words were from a foreign language. She turned quickly and rushed back to Adalei, who was slumped over on her bedroll holding her stomach. "Adalei? Do you have any idea what is causing you to vomit?"

Adalei's weary eyes gazed up at her lover, "I'm not certain." She answered.

"You couldn't be with child, could you?" Alix asked this question so calmly that it almost sounded inviting.

After several seconds of consideration, Adalei nodded, "It may be possible." She regrettably admitted in a grave tone.

Alix took a step back and frowned, "How could it be? You said that no solider harmed you."

Adalei wiped at tears that were now forming in her eyes, "They didn't…" she whispered.

Becoming noticeably upset, Alix's demeanor hardened, "Then how is it that you are with child?"

Xena stepped forward and placed a hand on Alix's shoulder. Alix smacked Xena's hand off her shoulder as she violently turned to face her, "Stay out of this." She hissed. She snapped her attention back to Adalei, "Explain to me." She commanded.

A whimpering noise escaped Adalei's thin body as she cleared her throat and sat up on her bedroll, "Please, let us speak in private."

Alix's eyes shifted over to Xena and Gabrielle. "Leave us."

Xena shared a glance with Gabrielle before mounting Argo and pulling the bard up behind her, "We'll return with food and firewood."

Alix nodded and watched as the two women rode out of sight. When they had left, she slowly turned back to face Adalei who was now shivering as she gently sobbed.

"Are you crying because you're secret can no longer be kept?"

"No…" Adalei sniffled, "I'm crying because I am ashamed."

Alix paced around the bedroll, "Were you not ashamed when you spread your legs?"

"Alixandriah…" Adalei's voice cracked as the painful words stabbed her heart.

"Do you think I am a fool?"

Adalei reached out for Alixandriah, "No, love, I do not."

Alix stepped out of Adalei's reach, "I do."

"My beloved," Adalei began, her voice trembled, "I have made a mistake; I seek your forgiveness."

"Mistake?" Alix mocked. "How do you mistakenly lay with a man?" Alix's voice was shaky as her emotions began to overwhelm her.

"I have struggled. You know this." Adalei hung her head, "I have never been as you are." Adalei paused as she stared deeply into Alix's eyes, "I was too naive before to understand what we share."

Alixandriah kicked at the dirt beneath her boots, "You had convinced me your struggling was over… You came back to me in Hispania."

"I missed you." Adalei confessed. "I love you, but I have not always understood it. When you risked your life to save me from Caesar's soldiers, I suddenly understood."

Alix's face had turned red with frustration, "What have I been? An experiment?"

"Of course not!" Adalei sobbed, "Alix, it has never been as clear for me. Surely, you must understand that. I have been torn ever since I met you."

"No, I do not understand." Alix snapped. "I kept you safe until Hispania, and I offered you my love, which you denied. You had no obligation to come to my campsite days later and confess that you loved me as well, and yet you did. I believed you. I believed you had finally sorted out your true emotions."

"Only to an extent." Adalei sighed, "Alix, I have always loved you, but I have never understood the concept of that love. For me, a man and a woman shared the only kind of love that seemed feasible. I was foolish to believe this way, but I did. But I couldn't just leave you, I cared for you too much."

"If you love me, why would you be with a man?" Alix's anger had subsided into an unfathomable hurt.

"I only did it once. When we were in Athens."

Alix's eyes shot up quickly, "I left you alone for one night in Athens, and it was the night you were kidnapped."

"That is the night." Adalei shook her head.

"Who is the father?"

"A young man named Thaddeus. He was very attractive and friendly. He spoke kindly to me all evening at the tavern and he paid for my food and my drink. He asked if I belonged to any man, and when I answered that I did not, he smiled, walked me to my room, and kissed me at the door. Everything after that is a bit of blur. At some point, the soldiers intruded and Thaddeus ran off… If I had known that it would come to this…"She glanced down at her stomach and sighed. After several seconds of silence, Adalei reached over for Alix once more, "It was a horrible mistake, Alix. I regret it more than I can speak of. I felt as if I needed confirmation that I could love you the way a woman loves a man."

"I do not want you to love me the way a woman loves a man." Alix pulled away once more, "I wanted you to love me the way a woman loves another woman."

"I was not sure how… or if it was even possible. I was never as confident as you…" Tears streamed from Adalei's face once more, "until you came for me… when I saw you riding into that field to rescue me from the soldiers, I saw my lover, my partner, my life. You are braver than any man and stronger than most. I don't deserve you, I know this, but I cannot bear the thought of losing you." Adalei choked back a flood of tears, "I am sorry… please, please, say that you can forgive me."

"How can I forgive you? You've dishonored me… you've betrayed me and lied to my very face… I sought out the help of Xena to save you… and now you carry a man's child." Alix gazed down at Adalei's stomach, "A constant reminder than I am not enough for the Princess of Iceni."

"That is not true." Adalei's eyes pleaded as she searched for the right words to change Alix's mind, "You are everything."

Alixandriah kneeled down and placed her hand above Adalei's navel, "Clearly, I am not." She gazed into Adalei's eyes and held the stare for several seconds, "I pray that Thaddeus is prepared to protect you both from Caesar."

Adalei lunged towards Alix, grabbing hold of her tightly, "I do not want Thaddeus! I do not care if my eyes behold him again as long as I live. It is only you that I want!" Alix released herself from the weeping woman's grasp and slowly walked off into the forest, disappearing into vast overgrowth.

**(II)**

When Xena and Gabrielle returned from the woods a candle mark later, they were both surprised to see that Adalei was still sitting on her bedroll, huddled in furs as she tried to keep warm until a fire was started, but Alixandriah was no where in sight.

Adalei welcomed them with red, puffy eyes and Gabrielle knew that Alix had abandoned her.

"She left." Adalei's raspy voice whispered. "About half a candle mark ago." She shook her head lightly, "I do not know if she plans to return."

"She's coming back." Xena replied steadily. "If she was leaving for good, she would have taken her supplies and her horse." Adalei gave Xena a perplexed look, as if she had not thought of such a logical deduction. "Gabrielle, build a fire. We'll need a large one tonight. I'll begin preparing dinner."

Adalei watched as the two women began working simultaneously in silence. They seemed to understand what the other needed without having to speak. "I am sorry for the trouble I have caused you."

"You have caused us no trouble." Xena replied, "Alix is our friend. We will always be here to help her."

"She is lucky to have someone who cares for her so…. I have failed to be a proper a mate."

Gabrielle glanced across the campsite at Xena; she watched and listened carefully to how Xena responded to the distressed woman.

"If one does not acknowledge one's true feelings, mistakes are often made." Xena replied insightfully.

Adalei sniffled, "I have recognized my true feelings now, but it is too late."

"That is unfortunate." Xena said simply and then propped the rabbit over the fire to roast.

A rustling in the bushes behind them caused all three women's heads to turn as Alixandriah entered into the campsite. She momentarily glanced at Adalei before walking over to Xena and whispering something in her ear. Xena excused herself from the campsite and followed Alixandriah a safe distance away. Adalei stared longingly in the direction of her lover, and feared what the two warriors were discussing. She shared a look with Gabrielle, who seemed just as concerned about the matter.

"No doubt that Alix wishes for me to leave." Adalei finally spoke.

Gabrielle cleared her throat; "I don't think Alix would set you off alone in a strange land while you're with child."

Adalei shrugged, "What would keep her from it?"

"Her decency…" Gabrielle replied effortlessly.

A few minutes later Xena and Alix returned. From the look on Xena's face, Gabrielle knew that some sort of decision had been made between the two warriors. She waited eagerly for Xena to share their discussion, but was surprised when Alixandriah spoke first.

"Adalei…" Alix swallowed heavily before continuing, "It is for the best that we find you a safe place to stay for winter, so that you and your baby will be out of Caesar's harmful grasp." She paused and inhaled deeply, "We have already made this journey and we have bought supplies to last us for winter, so we will stay nearby and we will do our best to keep you safe when we can, but you need to make your own life now… for yourself and your unborn child."

"Where will I go?" Adalei asked brokenheartedly.

"There is safe house not far from Germania's borderland." Xena explained, "They deal specifically with runaways and fugitives of Rome. They will not turn down a young mother. If they have the room, they can offer you a place for the season. We'll stay within the borderland and when the weather lightens, we'll return to Greece."

"Please understand that we want to ensure that you're capable of living safely with your child even after we are gone." Alixandriah added. "The safe house will be able to teach you valuable knowledge about how to avoid Caesar and how to provide for yourself."

"I understand that you do not want to be burdened with me." Adalei replied in a tone that seemed as bitter as it did depressing.

"We cannot accommodate for a child." Xena interjected. "It is too dangerous."

Gabrielle's sensitive side kicked in, though she had tried to stay out of the conversation, "What Xena means is that the baby will be much safer in a stable and caring home, not out in the wilderness with us. We face dangers every day, and there's always a group of thugs somewhere who end up getting their noses bloodied. A child shouldn't be in that environment."

"But the child will not be born for several more moons…" Adalei objected.

"Still, your condition while you carry it is important." Xena followed.

Adalei's eyes scanned the campsite and eventually landed on Alix, "We could raise this child… It could be yours as much as it is mine. I know that we both would love it. Our love would be enough."

Alix pushed back the tears she felt burning behind her eyes. Though she was hurt and angry, she still could not deny that she had strong feelings for this woman, but not so strong that she would let them cloud her logic. "I cannot love you anymore, Adalei, and I do not wish to care for a child, especially one that is not my own. I am sorry. Xena will take you to the safe house tomorrow morning."

**(III)**

Early the next morning Xena packed the mare that Alix has brought with them, and gave it to Adalei to keep. If nothing else, she could sell it for extra money if needed. As Xena climbed atop Argo, she waited patiently for Adalei to finish gathering her belongings and say goodbye.

"Will I ever see you again?" Adalei asked, unable to look Alix in the eyes.

"Yes." Alix answered shortly. "We will check on you from time to time. We'll do our best to help if there is ever any sign of Caesar."

Relieved to hear once more that Alix would still be around, at least for the winter, Adalei allowed herself to believe that there was still hope for a change of heart, "I will not be able to resist praying to the gods that you'll return to me."

"They are fickle gods." Alix remarked, "Your fate is as much as your own as theirs."

"Have I not already sealed my fate?" Adalei asked boldly as she turned and mounted the mare. Her eyes drifted to Gabrielle, "Thank you for your kindness, I'll always remember you for it." She turned to Xena and nodded that she was ready to leave.

When they were alone, Gabrielle turned to Alix and was surprised to see tears glistening down her cheek. She had been so strong and calm through the entire ordeal that it had not dawned on Gabrielle that Alix had yet to shed a tear.

"I'm so sorry." Gabrielle managed to whisper from across the campsite. "I know this must be painful."

"It's what I deserve." Alix sighed as she wiped at her cheeks. "I was turning into a romantic fool."

"No one deserves to be betrayed that way…" Gabrielle stepped closer to the warrior. You couldn't have known she would have ever done such a thing."

"I could have managed, had she been forced…." Alix choked back what was left of her tears, "We would have worked it out… but she did it willingly and that is the part that I cannot forgive."

"I understand." Gabrielle tenderly stroked Alix's arm. "I believe she is truly remorseful for what she's done. She realizes now that there is no one better than you, whether it be man or woman."

"If she did not know that before now, what business do I have with her?" Alix threw a few pieces of wood onto the fire and stirred a breakfast stew that Gabrielle had put on earlier that morning.

"Here, let me do that." Gabrielle reached for the spoon.

"No, it's all right, I want to help."

"No, you should rest on your bedroll; take time to sort things out."

Alix gripped the spoon tighter, "There's nothing to sort out. It's all very clear."

Gabrielle gave in; realizing now was not the time to antagonize Alix's stubborn side, she sat back and allowed Alix to finish preparing the stew. The ride to the safe house would take at least a day's journey there and back, and since Xena was the most familiar with the terrain, it made sense to let her escort Adalei to safety. In the mean time, Gabrielle actually found herself looking forward to spending some alone time with Alix, though she wished it wasn't under such dismal circumstances. She was surprised with how well Alix was holding up, considering how devastating it must have been to receive such shocking and hurtful new, but then again, it fit Alix's character perfectly to remain calm and friendly even during trying times. Not realizing she was losing herself in her thoughts, Gabrielle was caught off guard when Alix handed her a bowl of the stew and a slice of bread.

"Thank you." Gabrielle smiled and took the food.

"How are things with you and Xena?" Alix asked distantly as she dipped her bread into her stew.

Gabrielle chewed absent mindedly, "Not much different." She answered. "She's put up walls… high ones."

"Not surprising."

"I kissed her…" Gabrielle admitted, causing Alix's eyes to snap up from her food and her spoon to clang against the bowl as it feel from her hand. Gabrielle laughed lightly at the response, "Only for a moment… she pulled away and said mumbled that she couldn't do it."

"When was this?" Alix asked eagerly.

"Several nights ago, when we stayed at the inn." Gabrielle thought back to the night, "She's kept me at a safe distance ever since."

Alix chewed on this information for a bit before replying, "What is her reasoning for not allowing herself?"

Gabrielle sighed, "I'm not sure, but I know it has something to do with her being afraid that having a relationship with me will only cause harm and hurt for us both."

"Because she is a warrior? Or because she likes to secretly lay with men?"

Alix's bitter remark caught Gabrielle off guard, but what caught her more off guard was the thought of Xena's attraction to men. This was something that had never crossed her mind, "Xena is attracted to men…." Gabrielle muttered, "It seems I had forgotten…" she stared blankly into the fire.

"Xena would never do what Adalei has done."

"But it begs the question if love between two women could ever be enough for her? I don't know the answer. I've only ever known what I have felt for her…"

Alix scooted closer to the bard, "Gabrielle, don't let my misfortune pollute your ideas of love between two women. It is just as strong as any love between any two people. Perhaps even stronger."

"Strong enough to fulfill every desire? Strong enough to provide every need?" Gabrielle asked, the present situation currently laying on her mind.

"Yes." Alix nodded, "But it is rare, jut as it would be between a man and woman. But do not let the fact that is so hard to find keep you from searching for it."

"It's strange. I do not think of men… I do not feel tempted by them." Gabrielle observed, "I used to think that I would find the perfect man, but somewhere along the way it's become the perfect woman."

Alix could not resist a smile. It was endearing to hear how Gabrielle had come to terms with herself and her identity. "That's quite enlightening."

"Well, I have you to thank for that. Without your advice and guidance, I don't know if I would have ever reached these conclusions. Meeting you has…" Gabrielle paused, "It's changed my life."

Alix smiled again. She sighed heavily and placed her empty bowl of stew onto the cold ground, "Well, I'm glad you're happy with me. I've brought you to this rotten place for the winter." Alix looked around.

"It's not so bad." Gabrielle gazed around as well. "We have to build bigger fires and sleep under extra furs, but it's not so bad."

"We've yet to encounter any barbarians or any of the unfriendly sort." Alix added, "And luckily, there's been no snowfall, but that will change."

"We'll find better shelter once we've moved into the borderland."

"The three of us…" Alix noted. "Not quite how I imagined it."

Gabrielle laughed lightly, "I think it will be fun. Xena and you can do all of your warrior things, and you and I can share readings and writings." Gabrielle laughed again, "Come to think of it, if there was ever a perfect person for Xena and I both to be stuck with, it's you."

Alix laughed in agreement, "Indeed. It takes a special kind of person to appease both the warrior princess and the bard."

There was a long silence between them before Gabrielle broke down and asked, "Do you truly believe you'll never get back together?"

Alix glanced over at the curious blonde, "How can I, Gabrielle? My trust has been shattered. If Adalei does not wish to be with the father of her child, then I hope she finds a man who will be a good replacement."

"A man? Not a woman?"

Alix nodded, "She'll never be with another woman. It was far too conflicting to be with one. She certainly cannot handle another."

"I felt bad for her already, but hearing it put that way makes me feel worse. If she struggled with the idea of being with you, then clearly, it didn't come natural to her. Yet, she was with you for nearly two years. She must have cared; she must have tried."

"I would rather she had told me the truth, than go behind my back and share my bed with a stranger." Alix cleared her throat, "But I wish no harm to come to her, and I will not knowingly allow Caesar to hurt her."

"That's very noble of you." Gabrielle pulled her coat up closer around her neck.

"Cold?" Alix asked, noticing the gesture.

"A little." Gabrielle admitted. "Each day seems to bring an even colder temperature."

"I should gather extra firewood, and while I'm out, I'll hunt down lunch." Alix stood to her feet. "Don't worry, I won't be gone for long. I definitely don't want to leave you alone for any barbarians to find." She teased.

"I can manage to take down a few oversized trolls, if need be." Gabrielle replied boastfully.

"Yeah, but it's always more fun to take on things like that with a friend, eh?"

"Eh." Gabrielle smiled.

Later that evening, Gabrielle and Alix finished off their leftover lunch for dinner and snacked on a few slices of cheese that Alix had left over from the village shops. Gabrielle pulled out a few of her scrolls and began reading some of her work to Alix. She surprised at how embarrassed she felt when reading certain parts about Xena. The fact that Alix knew Gabrielle's true feelings seemed to reveal tiny secrets throughout her writing. After a few stories, Gabrielle decided that was enough for the night, and put the scrolls to rest.

"Well, if I didn't envy Xena before, I certainly do now." Alix leaned back against a nearby try as she pulled her furs up around her. "You write beautifully, Gabrielle. It's astonishing that you didn't attend a university."

"I wanted to…" Gabrielle paused, "A long time ago…"

"What changed?"

"I did." Gabrielle smirked. "I couldn't bear the thought of leaving Xena."

"Your loyalty to her is unlike any other I have ever witnessed."

Gabrielle sighed, "Ever since I left Potidaea, she's the only family I have. Without her, I'd have no one."

"That's not true." Alix shook her head, "At the very least you have your family back in Potidaea and I'm sure you've made friends in other places. You're far too likeable not have friends."

"I have friends, but…" Gabrielle narrowed her eyes, "But it's not the same."

"So, when you speak about Xena, you're speaking specifically about a lover, not a friend?"

"Well, we can't call ourselves lovers…"

"But when you fear losing her, or being alone, is it the fear that you'll never have another close friend, or that you'll never fall in love again?"

Suddenly faced with such an in depth question, Gabrielle wasn't sure how to answer it. After studying the question for a while, the answer became clear, "I fear that I will never experience a love that is as great as the love I have for Xena, and the thought of losing something so precious is terrifying."

"What if you could remain close with Xena, and still share a bond with her, but be in love with someone else?"

Gabrielle thought even longer about this question, as she searched deep within herself for an honest answer, "I want both." She finally admitted, "I want to keep my close bond with Xena and I also want to be in love with her and have her love me as well."

"But if she refuses your love, but wishes to keep your bond, you could find love again… in another person."

"Could I?" Gabrielle asked meekly. "I don't believe there will ever be a love that surpasses my love for Xena."

"So then, the question becomes, if Xena is never willing to be your lover, will you be able to accept that you will always only be friends?"

"It would hurt me, but I would never leave Xena, even if we could never be lovers. I just hope she wouldn't choose to leave me."

Alix smiled, "Xena would never leave you, Gabrielle."

"I just wish she would talk to me." Gabrielle pulled another fur onto her bedroll as she scooted closer to the fire for warmth. "If I could talk as freely with her as I do with you, it would help clear up so much."

"Well, if Xena is only willing to go so far, you can only do so much." Alix leaned forward. "And a girl like you is going to have quite the hard time keeping lovers at bay, and that goes for both the males and females."

Gabrielle blushed, "I haven't been pursued since…"

"Since?" Alix encouraged.

"Since Perdicus." Gabrielle lowered her head. "We were married… for a couple of days."

"Married?" Alix's voice squeaked. "By the gods, how old were you?"

"Nineteen." Gabrielle admitted. "He was a boy from my childhood and we had plans on getting married when I was still living in Potidaea, but then I ran away from home and joined up with Xena. A few years later, I ran into him in the countryside and suddenly, it was like everything had come rushing back to me. He asked me to marry him and I couldn't say no."

"A man that was worthy of leaving Xena…." Alix tried to wrap her mind around the concept; it wasn't an easy one to grasp.

"It was before I had fallen for her." Gabrielle admitted, "…but even then it pained me so much to leave her even for a few days."

"I take it things ended badly."

"He was killed." Gabrielle felt a wave buried of emotions surface, "Sometimes I wonder what it would be like if we were still together. I can't imagine."

"Neither can I." Alix agreed. "You seem designed to be exactly where you are."

"Who's to say I'm not?" A chill ran through Gabrielle, causing her to shiver.

"It's the coldest night we've had so far." Alix threw more wood onto the fire. "It's a good thing Xena plans on finding us a shelter soon. I'd retreat to the caves before I spent many more nights like this."

"Don't be surprised if you had to make good on that swear." Gabrielle laughed. "We can keep our bedrolls close tonight, that will help keep us warm."

"Oh…." Alix chuckled lightly and gazed around the campsite, "That's right, just the two of the tonight…"

"Come on." Gabrielle instructed as she stood from her bedroll and pushed it closer to Alix's, "We can also take turns on who throws wood on the fire. We definitely can't afford to let it die out."

"Don't worry about that." Alix replied as she situated her bedroll and furs, "I'll make sure the fire stays strong all night."

"It's only fair to take turns." Gabrielle protested.

"I'd prefer to do it. I don't care about it being fair."

Gabrielle sighed heavily, "For Zeus' sake, this stubbornness of yours…"

Alix felt a smile creep upon her face and as Gabrielle spun around quickly to spread out another fur on her bedroll, she caught her in her arms, "What about it?" Alix asked playfully, holding the bard close.

Gabrielle looked up into the sharp gray eyes and suddenly felt too flustered to respond. Quickly, she lowered her gaze so that their eyes no longer met, "It just always seems to prevail." She spoke in a softer, more timid voice.

Alix grinned as she released the smaller woman, "It's a valuable tool, when used correctly." She replied as she gingerly took the furs from Gabrielle's hand and spread it across her bedroll.

As both women settled into their bedrolls, Gabrielle felt an apprehensiveness overcome her. She turned on her side and faced Alix; she was somewhat excited to see that Alix was turned facing her as well. There was always something appealing about having Alixandriah's attention that made Gabrielle feel important.

"You're very beautiful." Alix remarked after staring at the bard for several moments. "I've wanted to say that since I met you."

"I think you've sort of hinted around about that a couple times already." Gabrielle recalled.

"Yes, but I wanted to say it clearly, and straight to you."

"Well, thank you." Gabrielle flashed a smile, "You're not so unattractive yourself."

"Ha…" Alix scoffed, "That's a polite way of putting it."

"I'm only teasing…" Gabrielle paused for a moment, "You're features are strong and powerful, yet lovely. You've managed to capture the strength of a warrior and the charm of a princess, all while presenting yourself in a way that neither resembles a man or woman."

"Well, I don't know about all of that…."

"I do." Gabrielle interjected. "I've thought about for a long time, and it's the perfect way of describing you."

"Is that so?"

"That is so." Gabrielle yawned. "So don't even think about bringing out your tool of stubbornness, because you won't win this one." She snuggled further under the furs, seeking extra warmth.

"No, I choose my battles wisely." Alix remarked as she pulled a fur up around her neck.

"If there's one thing I've learned, it's that timing is everything." Gabrielle's sleepy voice trailed off as she contently drifted into a peaceful sleep.


	9. IX

_**A/N: I wanted to apologize for it taking so long to update. I have had my hands full lately with school, work, and life. Thanks for standing by and encouraging me to keep posting. As always, I'll try to post more regularly and not leave readers hanging for such long periods of time. As a comment for this chapter, we've reached the point in the story where Gabrielle and Xena both have made their feelings clear, so the question becomes, "where to from here?" I'm looking forward to exploring several different options and ****I can't wait to write what happens next.**_

**(I)**

The borderland proved to be a suitable place to spend the winter. Xena was able to negotiate with a friendly tribe and rent a hut for the season. The tribe leader, who was eager for coin, also offered Xena his eldest daughter for a reasonable price. Though Xena declined, she suffered continuous teasing from both Alix and Gabrielle about the subject. After only a few days, the three women had arranged the hut to their liking, and soon created a cozy home for the winter.

Alix had finished building a small fire inside the fireplace; she grabbed her bow and headed out for the wilderness, anticipating a successful hunt. Gabrielle's attention quickly fell onto her friend when she realized she was heading out alone.

"Alix… you should take Xena with you." Gabrielle suggest politely. "Just until we're sure it's safe around here."

"Don't worry, Gabrielle." Alix smiled. "The tribes are friendly. If anything, they'll probably try to sell me our lunch instead of allowing me to hunt for it."

Gabrielle laughed lightly, but soon her serious tone returned, "We've only met one tribe, there are others. We're visitors here, and some may even see us as intruders."

Alix sighed, "Gabbie, I can't drag Xena along with me every time I go out for a hunt. She has her own things to do."

"Then I'll come with you." Gabrielle reached for her staff.

Alix began to object, but realizing it was futile, she allowed the blonde to come along. As they left the hut they passed by Xena, who was tending to Argo.

"Where you heading?" Xena asked casually.

"Down by the river." Alix replied as she shielded her eyes from the high noon sun, "If we're lucky, we may sneak up on some deer."

"It's unlikely." Xena replied. "I'd head east, towards the valleys. The deer are more likely to have retreated there for the colder months."

"Well, they have to drink don't they?" Alix asked.

"Yes." Xena's eyes lifted from her work, "There is a stream that runs through the largest valley. It's ideal hunting ground."

"And you got this reliable information from the tribe leader." Gabrielle raised an eyebrow.

"He managed to get the point across to me, yes. I went to check it out myself this morning." Xena remarked, as she countered Gabrielle's teasing. "There's plenty of wildlife running around. You'll find something."

"You heard the lady." Alix clapped Gabrielle's shoulder, "To the valleys we go."

Gabrielle shrugged and shook her head slightly as she turned to head east with Alix. After they had walked for a while, Gabrielle began to worry if they were heading in the right direction.

"Alix, I think maybe we've made a wrong turn." Gabrielle gazed around at the ominous wilderness. "Xena said she made the trip there and back this morning, we should have come up on it by now."

"I'm sure it's just a little further." Alix reassured. "Xena was on horseback this morning, she made the trip a lot faster than on foot."

Gabrielle pondered this thought for a moment and then accepted that it was logical. "Still…" She began cautiously, "If we don't find the valleys soon, let's just head back. We can catch fish from the river."

"Aw, come on, Gabbie. Why settle for fish when you could have deer?" Alix asked playfully as she slowly turned Gabrielle around and pointed her towards the direction of a young buck, which was grazing on some dry grass a few hundred feet away.

Gabrielle's eyes lit up with excitement. "Look at the size of him! That would feed us for weeks."

"He has a good coat as well." Alix added. "We could use the extra fur." Slowly, Alix reached for her bow and pulled an arrow from her quiver. "Stay here. I'm going to try for a closer shot." Alix whispered as she hunched over and slowly made her way through the brush.

Gabrielle watched with admiration as Alix crept upon her prey. Her movements were graceful and quick, which reminded Gabrielle of a large mountain cat sneaking up on its unsuspecting victim. Finally close enough for a respectful shot, Alix lifted her arrow to the bow and pulled back its heavy string, causing the muscles in her arm to flex. Steadily, she held this position for several seconds. Gabrielle marveled at the amount of strength Alix exhibited to hold the arrow so securely upon the string. Within the blink of an eye, Alix released the arrow, penetrating the target directly in the neck.

"Perfect shot!" Gabrielle exclaimed as she ran up next to Alix. "Where did you learn such concentration?"

Alix shrugged, "I've just always been good with the bow. I prefer it over the sword, but bows and arrows are useless in hand to hand combat."

"Well, with hungry bellies to feed, your skills won't go to waste this winter." Gabrielle smiled.

"I look forward to the practice." Alix replied as she threw the bow over her shoulder and headed off down the hillside towards her prey.

Gabrielle caught up with the warrior a few moments later. Alix removed the arrow from the buck's neck, wiped off the blood, and slid the arrow back into her quiver. "No point in wasting a good arrow." She remarked.

Suddenly, a thought struck Gabrielle, "Alix, how are we going to get this beast back to the hut? He's too large."

"He's too large now, is he?" Alix laughed. "You didn't seem to think so when we first spotted him."

"That's before I thought about carrying him back to camp." Gabrielle frowned. "We could go get Xena. She could bring Argo…"

"No." Alix interrupted. "We can't just leave him here. There are plenty of other animals nearby who would dive into this feast the moment we turn our backs. Besides, I can carry him." Gabrielle attempted to avoid looking skeptical of Alix's claim, but failed. "Here." Alix handed the blonde her bow. "Carry this for me, and I'll toss our friend, here, upon my shoulders."

"Alix, I'm not sure if you should…."

"Trust me. I've carried much larger." Alix replied as she bent down and heaved the dead animal onto her shoulders. With a loud grunt she lifted to her feet and slowly began walking back towards the hut. "Well, are you coming?" She turned back to the awe struck Gabrielle, who had yet to move a step.

"Is there anything you can't do?" Gabrielle asked with a sudden hint of infatuation in her tone.

"I thought we already covered that? I'm a horrible bargainer." Alix reminded.

"You're not a horrible bargainer." Gabrielle smiled as she began walking next to her friend.

Alix's stride was noticeably shorter now that she had the deer upon her shoulders, but she had no problems keeping pace with Gabrielle as they made their way back to camp.

"You seem to forget that I paid twenty dinars for Xena's pack."

"And seven for this necklace." Gabrielle's hand immediately reached for her neck as she clutched loosely at the jewelry.

"I don't consider the necklace a bad purchase. It's well worth seven dinars. You haven't taken it off since I bought it for you."

Gabrielle agreed, "I don't want to take it off, it's a lovely piece. I fear that I might lose it." A smile quickly flashed across her face, "Thank you again for buying it for me. It was very kind of you."

"It was a pleasure." Alix quickly replied. "It looks much better on you than it did hanging in that merchant's shop." Alix noticed Gabrielle's cheeks turn red and knew she had succeeded at making the woman blush.

When they reached the hut, Xena was waiting patiently by the fire outside. Impressed that Alix was able to carry the large creature on her shoulders, she made a joking comment about Alix being more useful than a pack mule, but then got down to business as she began preparing the deer for food. Later that evening, the three women huddled inside their hut, seeking warmth from the chilling winter weather. The first snow would fall any day now, but with plenty of food and a roof over their heads, they felt prepared for whatever Mother Nature had in store.

Alix had cuddled up close to the fireplace and within minutes was dozing contently. Gabrielle was writing about the day's events, specifically the hunt she had gone on with Alix, along with the strength and concentration she had witnessed from the other woman. Xena was busying herself with repairing one of her boots, but glanced over and happened to read a few of the words on Gabrielle's scroll. Noticing Alix's name, she felt a tinge of jealousy knot up in her stomach.

"Writing about the hunt?" Xena asked, keeping her focus on the sole of her boot.

"Mmhm." Gabrielle replied distantly as she continued to scribble down the events.

"Must have been exciting." Xena added.

"It was."

Xena watched for a few moments as Gabrielle quickly filled up the scroll. "Is there really that much to say?"

For the first time, Gabrielle looked up from her scroll, "I want to get all the details down. I need to make sure I describe it exactly as it happened, moment for moment."

A disapproving sound formed in Xena's throat, "Why?" she asked gruffly.

"You should have seen her, Xena. The way she stalked towards the buck, she was quick and light on her feet, and so graceful. Then, when she had a clear shot, she pulled back the arrow with tremendous force, and you could see the muscles under her skin bulge. It would have been enough to make any man's arm shake, but she held it there… so steady…." Gabrielle paused as she replayed the imagine her mind, "It was like she was a statue… she held it until just the right moment and when she released the arrow, it flew through the air perfectly and pierced the buck's neck, dropping to the ground effortlessly. It was the cleanest shot I've ever seen. She was even able to save the arrow. Everything about it was so… beautiful."

"So, you suddenly find it beautiful to shoot animals in the neck?" Xena scoffed.

Gabrielle felt the tension rising between them, "No, it's not that. You know I don't like to watch animals die, but there was just something about the way she did it. It was like… art." Gabrielle paused for a moment and the excitement returned, "And then she lifted the deer up on her shoulders and began walking back to camp. I knew she was strong, but I never imagined…" Gabrielle trailed off. "Anyway, I just want to make sure I get the details right. When people read about her, I want them to know exactly what it was like. She can be like a role model for hunters, both male and female."

"A role model?" Again, Xena felt the stinging pains of jealousy, "Why are you trying to turn her into some hero?"

"I'm not." Gabrielle quickly defended. " I just think that it's important to document her superior hunting skills."

"She got lucky." Xena spat. "She didn't even make it to the valleys. She just happened to come across a deer and her first shot was the kill shot. It was luck."

"Xena, how can you say that? You weren't even there."

"I didn't have to be there. I know enough about hunting and enough about Alix to know she got lucky." Xena threw down her unrepaired boot. "You shouldn't worship her like that. You're going to give her an ego she can't contain."

Gabrielle felt a surge of anger rush through her body. "I disagree." She stated boldly. "I think Alix is an exceptional hunter, and she deserves the proper praise for providing food and fur for us all. How can you be so judgmental over her, when she's the reason your belly is full tonight?"

"My belly would not go empty without Alixandriah." Xena's eyes narrowed.

"You're being ridiculous." Gabrielle stood to her feet. "Face it, you're not the only heroic warrior around here any longer." She grabbed a fur and headed out of the hut.

Gabrielle's words burned through Xena, causing her to jump to her feet as well and follow after the bard. Not surprisingly, the winter air was bitterly cold. Instantly regretting her hot headed decision, but too stubborn and angry to turn back now, Gabrielle immediately began the struggle to build a fire.

"What are you doing?" Xena demanded.

"What does it look like I'm doing?" Gabrielle shot back as she glanced up at the taller woman.

"Do you plan to spend the night out here?" Xena's voice was drenched with a tone unfamiliar to Gabrielle.

"Maybe I will." Gabrielle remarked. "It couldn't be half as cold out here as it is in there."

"Spare me the bit, Gabrielle." Xena held up her hand.

"What is it about her, Xena, that bothers you so much?" Gabrielle asked as she furiously sparked at the flint rock in her hands, hoping to ignite a fire. "You act like you can't stand for another woman to be strong or powerful… or talented in some way. Do you really think you're the only one? Zeus' gift to womankind?"

Xena's face burned bright red with resentment, "You know I don't think that." She hissed.

"Then what is it, Xena? Alix is your friend. She fought in battle with you. You were willing to leave the Empire in order to protect her and her lover. Why would you do all of these things if you despise her so much?"

"It's not that I despise her… It's just…. " Xena's voice calmed. "She's not good enough…."

"What do you mean she's not good enough? Not good enough for what?"

"Gods, Gabrielle, must you always play the naïve, love struck, young girl?"

Overwhelmed with the conversation and the failure to start a warm fire, Gabrielle angrily threw down her flint stone, jerked up from the ground, and turned to face Xena, "Love struck?" She repeated in a much higher voice, "You think I'm love struck after Alix?" Xena's lips pierced together as she hesitated to reply. Gabrielle shook her head, "So, that's it. She's not good enough for me? That's what you meant…" Gabrielle swallowed heavily, "Well, I guess you aren't good enough for me either, are you, Xena?" she folded her arms. "Or is that other way around? Maybe I'm not good enough for you?"

"That's not what I meant." Xena's voice cracked in the icy winter air.

"Then for once in your life, why don't you just say what you really mean?" Though she was angry, there was a sense of desperation in Gabrielle's voice, "Just say it…"

"Gabrielle, I love you… I do…. but…" Xena dropped eye contact and hung her head; "I can't give myself to you. I have to be prepared to sacrifice everything, including myself, and I can't do that if we…"

"I don't believe you." Gabrielle interrupted as tears began forming in her eyes, "You're still not telling the truth, Xena."

"I am." Xena emphasized, her voice trembling. "I know that the second I give in to you, I'm going to want to spend every moment holding you, protecting you, and nothing else… I have a duty to the people, to myself, to the Gods… love would hinder my abilities to fulfill that duty."

A few tears streaked Gabrielle's face, "So, it's not that you _don't _love me, it's that you _wont_…"

Xena stepped forward, "I can only love you so much…" She clarified. "I know that isn't fair… that's why I don't want this to go any farther than…" she paused, absorbing the pain covering Gabrielle's face. "Gabrielle, please understand. I do love you. I do." She reached out gently and pulled the bard closer. "If I could give you what you wanted, I would."

"Xena…" Gabrielle whispered, "All I've ever wanted is to be with you… but you won't even give me that. Instead, you've convinced yourself that I'll only get in your way."

"No, I'd get in my own way…"

"Because of me." Gabrielle pulled away from the embrace, "I can't decide whether you're incredibly selfish, or just completely ignorant. You don't want me as your partner, but you don't want me to be with anyone else either? I don't love Alix, Xena, but I can't deny that she's shown me so much about myself and about what I want in my life. She has every quality that makes her a powerful warrior and yet, she's still capable of love. Why aren't you?"

"Gabrielle…" Xena stepped forward once more.

"No." Gabrielle held up her hand. "Don't… I don't want to hear anymore excuses." She turned to walk back into the hut, but turned quickly for one last comment, "She's more than good enough, Xena…. Just for the record."

Xena's mouth gaped open as she watched the bard retreat to the hut. She felt a cold chill race down her back, and slowly lifted her head towards the sky to see a few snowflakes beginning to descend from the clouds. She sighed heavily and bent down to pick up the flint stone that Gabrielle had cast away a few minutes before. After several tries, the spark caught and she was able to get large fire going. She grabbed a few extra furs from Argo's pack and made a decent bed on the ground. She had slept outside in much worse weather than this, so she had no fear of the winter cold. After a few minutes, she was able to find warmth from the fire and furs though the snow continued to fall around her.

**(II)**

Daylight the next morning came quickly, and Alixandriah was up and out of the hut not long after the sun had risen. The snow-covered ground quickly took her aback, but she was even more surprised to see Xena's body huddled near a fading fire.

"Xena!" Alix exclaimed as she bent down next to the warrior and lifted her shivering body from underneath the icy furs. "What are you doing out here?"

Xena shakily rose to her feet, realizing must have been passed out too long to rebuild the fire. Her face was pale and her lips were blue, causing Alix to immediately be concerned over her health. "Come on, you have to get inside and get warm." Alix tugged on the warrior, who gave no resistance.

As the small door to the hut swung open forcefully, Gabrielle jerked up from her sleep in time to see Alix practically dragging Xena in from the outside. Gabrielle quickly rushed over to help the women.

"Throw some extra wood on the fire." Alix instructed as she gingerly placed Xena on her bedroll. "And hand me your extra furs."

Gabrielle did as she was told, and watched carefully as Alix began rubbing Xena's arms and legs, in an attempt to warm her body. Gabrielle quickly realized Xena had spent the night outside and immediately felt anger rise within her. Why would Xena be so stubborn as to spend the night in the snow?

"Xena, why didn't you come inside?" Gabrielle's tone was harsh. "You could have frozen to death out there."

Xena's weary eyes glanced over at the bard, but she gave no reply. Instead she pulled the furs up around her, and pushed Alix away.

"Xena, I need to get you warm…" Alix explained as she reached down once more for Xena's arm.

"I'll be fine." Xena replied in a whisper. "I just want to rest." She added softly as she gazed into fire.

Gabrielle and Alix exchanged questioning looks. "You should eat something. I can make some stew; that will help keep you warm." Gabrielle suggested.

"I'll take care of the chores… and the horses." Alix volunteered. With a heavy sigh, Alix lifted to her feet, grabbed a heavy coat from her pack, and headed out of the hut.

Once alone in the hut, Gabrielle could no longer hide her frustration, "Do you feel as if you've accomplished something by sleeping in the snow?"

"It wasn't such a bad idea when you were threatening to do it." Xena's hoarse voice replied.

"I didn't know it was going to snow, Xena. If I did, I would have dragged you back into the hut myself." Gabrielle filled a pot with water and began throwing in chunks of deer meat into it. "Gods, I've never met two women more stubborn than the both of you." She turned quickly and placed her hands on her hips, "Between the two of you, I constantly have my hands full. You're like children."

Xena shook her head and let a small laugh escape her body. "You don't find yourself a bit stubborn as well?" She asked critically.

"This isn't about me." Gabrielle shot back, "I'm not the one who spent the night outside. You didn't have to do that."

"Well, I couldn't just come back in and crawl into bed with you, could I? You've taken that way from us. We'll never have that again." Xena's bitter tone stabbed at Gabrielle's heart.

Gabriele hung the pot over the fire and turned around slowly to face Xena, "Are you accusing me of ruining our friendship?"

"You didn't ruin it, but you had to go and make it complicated…" Xena continued. "Things were fine the way they were. I could deal with all of this before you…." Xena held back the words. "I hoped it would never happen, but I realize now that I was a fool to think it could be avoided. I should have spotted it from day one."

Gabrielle's eyes widened, "What do you mean by 'it,' Xena? My love for you? Is that what you're so affectionately referring to?"

"There's a word for it, Gabrielle." Xena scooted closer to the fire, "You've read about Sappho. You know what the women who lived on the island were referred to as."

"Lesbos." Gabrielle concluded. "Is that what you think I am?"

"Isn't that what you are?" Xena countered.

"I don't know." Gabrielle shook her head, "I don't know, Xena. All I know is that I wanted to be with you, because you were everything to me. Now, I just feel so lost and so confused and angry…. I always had this fear that we'd never be together, but something convinced me that you'd understand… that you, of all people, would comprehend that love knows no boundaries… I thought…." Gabrielle hesitated, "I thought we'd be together. I thought you'd love me the way I love you. You're right; I've been nothing more than a naïve, young girl. I always have been when it comes to you."

"It can't be." Xena's eyes filled with tears and she quickly blinked them away. "The sooner you realize that, the better off we'll be."

"I realize." Gabrielle whispered.

"I'm sorry for what I said about, Alix." Xena cleared her throat, "I had no right to interfere or say anything at all. Whatever happens between you two is no business of mine."

Gabrielle felt the heaviness of the conversation begin to lighten, and she understood that Xena was ending the discussion. "So, that's it? We can't go back to what we had and we can't move on from where we are." Gabrielle sat down next to Xena. "I don't think I'll ever be able to stop loving you, Xena."

"We can move forward from this, Gabrielle." Xena reached out and placed her hand on Gabrielle's arm, "Maybe, one day, we can even go back."

Gabrielle looked away for a moment, "Tell me that you'd say that to anyone."

"What?" Xena asked, her eyes darting back and forth.

"Tell me that if anyone, man or woman, told you they loved you, that you'd tell them you couldn't be with them because of your duty. You would, wouldn't you? You'd turn down anyone, not just me…" Gabrielle's eyes softened as she waited for a reply.

"….Yes." Xena answered steadily. "I'd turn down anyone."

"And if you weren't out to redeem yourself and save the world?" Gabrielle sniffled.

"I'd be with you…" Xena nodded.

"Gods…" Gabrielle immediately stood to her feet and shook her head, "It just never it sounds any better." She wiped at the tears in her eyes. "It sounds so selfish."

"I'd be a lot more selfish if I gave up on my promise, my mission, for my own personal pleasures."

"Xena, maybe you need to learn how to balance both…" Gabrielle argued, "It doesn't have to be one or the other. Hercules never stopped himself from loving; you shouldn't either. You've convinced yourself that love is going to make you weaker, but it would give you so much strength, if you'd just let yourself give in. You're afraid, and that's understandable, but the fear is what makes you weak."

"I don't trust myself enough…. Not yet, anyway."

Gabrielle had no further argument left in her. "I'm not going to leave you, Xena. But I'm not going to wait around for something that may never happen."

"I understand." Xena's response was quick.

Gabrielle ran her hand through her hair and let out a deep breath, "Alix…."

"You don't have to explain anything to me." Xena interrupted. "I'd prefer if you didn't."

Gabrielle nodded, "Okay." She turned slowly and walked back towards the pot to stir the stew. Allowing the previous conversation to drift away, Gabrielle focused on the stew. "This is almost ready." She called over her shoulder.

The door to the hut suddenly opened and Alix quickly rushed inside, "Zeus' sake! It's a blizzard out there!"

"It's still snowing?" Xena asked concerned.

"It's coming down heavy out there, and quickly. We may need to bring Argo and Tallus inside." Alix suggested.

"Argo is not coming inside." Gabrielle protested the idea. "She stinks."

Xena cast Gabrielle an offended look, "Argo does not stink… no worse than Tallus, anyway."

"Xena, she smells like sweat and feces." Gabrielle remarked.

"Well, it hardly seems fair to leave either of them out there in this weather." Alix moved towards the fire to warm herself. "I admit we don't have much room in here as it is, but…"

"We can't keep two horses in here all winter. We'll have to build a makeshift barn for them. I'm sure the tribes have plenty of hay for their horses. We could buy some from them." Gabrielle lifted the pot from the fire and sat it down on a small table to cool

"That's a good idea." Alix agreed. "And we'll do that as soon as the storm lets up, but for now, they need to come inside."

Gabrielle let out a frustrated sigh, "All right… all right…. But keep them on that side of the hut." She pointed towards the door, and away from the food. "And if either of them decide to 'drop' anything while they're in here, you're to clean it up immediately."

Alix smirked, "Yes ma'am."


	10. X

**A/N: This one was fun to write.**

**(I)**

Xena eyed the tribal leader carefully; she slowly paced around him as he stood perfectly still. She opened her mouth to speak, "I know you understand me well enough to admit that you've stolen something from us, and I'm giving you once chance to give it back."

"Xena, maybe he didn't take it." Gabrielle objected. This had gone on for quite a while now and to no avail. "There are other tribes."

"We've never met any other tribe." Xena snarled, "And even if it was a different tribe, how would they have known where we were stocking our supplies? Why would they bother to take them, but nothing else?"

"Well, why would he?" Alix shrugged and nodded her head towards the solemn chief.

"Coin." Xena easily replied. "He wants us to buy our supplies back from him, so he can make a profit. Greedy bastard."

"Xena!" Gabrielle scolded. "Look, this isn't getting us anywhere. He isn't going to talk to you as long as you keep threatening him."

"We'll see about that…." Xena raised her first two fingers on each hand and lunged towards the chief.

"Hey!" Gabrielle quickly jumped in front of the vengeful warrior, "No! No pinch."

Xena reluctantly lowered her hands, "Fine… _You _talk to him." She folded her arms.

Gabrielle exhaled and quickly turned to face the chief. She smiled widely, and gently took a step towards him, "Hi." She greeted by briefly raising a hand. "I'm sorry about my friend, here, she has a bit of an anger problem."

The chief's eyes glanced over to Xena and then back to Gabrielle, "Jeevoo a'lero."

"Uhh… I'm sorry… " Gabrielle's smile faded and she shook her head to signal she did not understand.

"Jeevoo a'lero…." The chief repeated slowly, "Warrior woman."

"Oh!" Gabrielle's eyes opened broadly in surprise, "Yes…. Yes…. Xena is a warrior woman." Her smile returned. She glanced over her shoulder, "And so is Alix." She turned back to the chief, "So, listen, if you did take our supplies, or know who did, we'd really like to get them back."

"No supplies." The chief slowly shook his head.

"Okay…" Gabrielle paused for a moment while she quickly tried to think of another alternative. "Umm, could we perhaps buy supplies from you?"

"Gabrielle…" Xena's tone was forewarning.

The chief was hesitant to reply, but finally nodded his head in compliance. "Nekino." He motioned for the women to follow him as he began walking back towards his camp.

Gabrielle turned to Xena and Alix who were both returning questionable looks, and signaled for them to come along. After a long sigh and a few choice words mumbled under her breath, Xena hoped atop Argo and began following the chief.

Alix and Gabrielle traveled on foot a few paces behind Xena. Alix leaned in closer to the bard as they walked, "We're really going to follow him all the way back to his village just to buyback the supplies he stole from us?"

"We don't know for sure that he took them. But if he did, Xena can pinch the entire tribe if she wants to."

"And I had such a relaxing day planned." Alix sighed.

"Oh, really?" Gabrielle teased, "A full day of lounging by the fire and snoozing?"

"And a few other ideas… some reading…. writing." Alix smirked, "It's almost winter solstice. I'd like to begin work on a couple gifts."

"Gifts? You intend on writing something as a gift this winter?" Gabrielle's intrigue rose. "Poetry?"

"Poetry… music… short stories… maybe your very own fairy tale." Alix's hand slid into Gabrielle's, "Or would you prefer a play?"

"Only if you're planning to act in it as well." Gabrielle returned, "That would be a gift all its own." She gently squeezed Alix's hand and then released it. Though it was comforting to know Alix held affection for the bard, Gabrielle felt it best to never let things go too far, especially in front of Xena.

"A one woman show wouldn't be much fun." Alix admitted, "But perhaps when we return to the Empire, I can hire a few poor actors to put it on for you."

"Return to the Empire…." Gabrielle glanced down at the ground as she continued to walk, "Can we even do that?"

"Sure." Alix's head tilted as she attempted to make eye contact with Gabrielle. "Why would you question it?"

"Caesar isn't one to forget." Gabrielle swallowed, "It may not be safe as long as he's in power."

A disapproving grunt exited Alix's mouth, "If Caesar knows what's best for him, he will keep away. I have too many reasons to end his life."

"So does Xena…. But it's never happened."

"Yeah, well, I'm not Xena." Alix glanced up at the woman who was trotting atop her horse, "She tries not to kill. That gets in the way of giving Caesar what he deserves."

"It isn't killing that makes someone stronger than someone else, it's being able to resist those urges that show one's true strength."

Alix nodded, "Normally, I would agree with you, but Caesar is different. He's inflicted too much hurt and too much sadness into the lives of so many. To let a man like that live is a far greater transgression than dealing with any guilt of taking human life."

"But that's just it, Alix. He is still a human and to kill him is take a human life… why would we ever consider ourselves worthy of deciding who lives and who dies? It makes us no better than Caesar."

"What is one life compared to thousands?" Alix retorted, her cool demeanor fading into aggravation. "By allowing Caesar to live, you're condoning the deaths of his victims."

"We cannot control what Caesar does with his life."

"We can if it effects our own. "Alix defended. "You'd rather him take the life of an innocent? Of thousands of innocents?"

"Of course not…." Gabrielle's toned hardened, "And I would do everything to stop him."

"Except kill him." Alix scoffed.

"Are you saying that you'll kill Caesar if you ever see him again?"

"I'm not saying that I won't." Alix's eyes shot up when heard the clamor of village life. "We're here… that was faster than I imagined."

Gabrielle glanced up as well; she too was surprised the trip to the village did not take longer. As they walked closer to the huts, the tribe people seemingly stopped what they were doing and devoted all of their attention onto the strange new visitors.

"Hasn't anyone ever told them that it's rude to stare?" Alix asked in a low whisper.

"Just don't return the rude gesture." Gabrielle suggested. She tugged on Alix's sleeve and they moved closer towards Xena, who was now also traveling on foot.

"They aren't used to foreigners…." Xena noted.

"Obviously." Gabrielle replied. "Let's just look at the supplies and get out of here as quickly as possible."

"If he has our supplies, I'm not leaving without them… and I do not intend to pay for them a second time."

"Just stay calm until we figure out for sure what's going on." Gabrielle reminded. "There's no reason to jump to any conclusions until we actually see…" Gabrielle's words drifted away as her eyes landed upon her cooking pot, sitting proudly out in front of one of the merchant's shops. "My cooking pot!"

Xena's eyes darted towards the pot, a feeling of anger rushed over her. "I should have known better to not lock up our supplies."

"Over there are our extra furs." Alix pointed to a smaller shop, "I would know because I sowed the corners with a particular pattern."

"All right… all right…. Let's speak with the chief again and show him that we recognize our own supplies." Gabrielle held out her hands in front of her, "I'm sure that once he realizes we're aware of what's he done, he'll not want any problems…"

"I'm finished with talking." Xena replied as she reached for her sword. "Hey chief!" she shouted, causing the older man to turn around and face her. "Some of your wares are looking a little too familiar." Xena picked up the pot with her spare hand and held it up for him to see.

"Healia a'pololo ha wan je'polin sa'haa denna ronoso." The chief followed up with a mischievous grin.

"What?" Xena demanded, not finding the chief's disposition amusing.

"He said, anyone who is ignorant enough to leave supplies unguarded deserves to have them taken away."

Xena, Alix, and Gabrielle all turned at the same time to see who had translated the statement. A young, dark haired woman, with pale skin stepped forth. She didn't look like the rest of the tribal people, she appeared much softer and more cultured, but she was dressed as they were and clearly could translate their language. She wasn't unattractive, in fact she had gorgeous features, but there was something about her that appeared standoffish.

"Who are you?" Xena asked, her grip on her sword tightening.

"That is not important. What is important is that you are threatening the chief in front of his entire village… in front of all his people… put down your sword."

"No." Xena returned, her eyes piercing. "Tell them to give us back our supplies."

"You will not get them back, unless you purchase them." The woman replied as she stepped closer to Xena. "You made an error, you must pay the consequence for it."

"If anyone has made an error here, it's him." Xena raised her sword higher, "Either he hands over our supplies, or I'll go through each shop until I've recollected them all."

"If you use violence, you'll only be killed." The woman glanced over at the chief, "Ya'no, fonhu lo je'polin?"

"No." The chief replied hatefully. "Je'polin ge unpalo. He'shovu je'polin la tando."

"I asked him if he would sell the supplies at a discount. He said no, but he would trade for the supplies. You must take his daughter if you want your supplies."

"How is that a trade?" Alix asked in amusement. "He'll only return our supplies if we take his daughter as well?"

"Colah sin a lo wan digeran. Osha sune fren he'shovu, je'olo canindosa je'polin."

"He does not have time to explain. You must take his daughter if you want the supplies."

"Marriage?" Xena asked. "Is that what he means?"

"He realizes that marriage is not convenient, he only asks that you care for her and that you will protect her from harm. You must take her with you, wherever you go."

"So she is bound to us?" Xena inquired. 

"To one of you, yes."

"That sounds like marriage." Alix concluded, a hint of a smile creeping onto her lips. "I'll be damned, the tribal people of Germania are conducting female to female marriages… now, isn't that progressive." Alix laughed, "You know, Xena, I rather like this village. Perhaps we should take them up on their offer. Maybe even stay here for a while. Say, how much to rent a hut in the village?" she teasingly asked the woman.

"Fine then… Alix will take her." Xena extended her hand to the chief so that they could shake upon their arrangement."

"Whoa, wait a minute." Alix interjected. "I'm not interested in a wife." Alix laughed, "Xena, I think you'd be a better match."

"It's not an actual marriage, Alix. You just have to be her hero if she gets in trouble… I think you can you handle that." Xena shook the chief's hand. "Have our supplies and your daughter ready soon, we need to get back to our camp before dark." The dark haired woman translated, and the chief nodded his head in agreement.

"He will meet you at the bridge in one candle mark." The woman replied. "Please wait for him there." With that, the woman turned towards the chief, and together they walked away towards the chieftain hut.

"Well, at least she didn't pinch anyone." Gabrielle sighed.

"Yeah, instead we get to have a wild little tribal woman running around after us." Alix joked.

"You mean after _you._" Gabrielle clarified. "And from the sound of it, she'll be following you around for quite a while."

Alix's cheerful expression faded, "So, I'll teach her our language, buy her a change of wardrobe, and find her a nice farm somewhere in the Empire."

"Abandon her?" Gabrielle questioned.

Alix was hesitant to reply, "Well, Gabbie, I don't really know what else to do with her. She'll be fine in the Empire. We'll even find her a husband… or a partner… whatever she likes. I'm sure she'll be happy, eh? And then we'll have a new friend to visit." She patted Gabrielle on the back, "Come on, off to the bridge then."

As they waited by the bridge, Xena's patience began to wear thin. It had been half a candle mark already and she had seen no sign of anyone gathering their supplies in the village. Her mind wandered onto the topic of whether or not it could be a trick.

"So, that woman…" Gabrielle began thinking aloud, catching the attention of both Alix and Xena, "What do you think she's doing here? She's obviously not a part of their tribe."

"I'd say she is a part of the tribe, just not a part of their people." Alix added.

"Clearly, she is a different race." Xena cleared her throat; "She's most likely a go between for the tribe. She helps them communicate with other people when necessary."

"Well, isn't that an extravagant commodity for such a small village." Alix replied.

"Perhaps she is there against her will. Perhaps kidnapped." Xena explained, "Most likely, she's been there since she was a child."

Gabrielle's curiosity rose, "Where do you suppose she is from?"

"Judging by her pale skin tone, she was probably born not too far from here. Towards Gaul, perhaps." Alix pondered the thought, "I didn't recognize her dialect, but I'm not familiar with all dialects of Gaul, and if she's been staying with the tribe for many years, then her dialect is most likely contaminated anyway."

"She does look western." Gabrielle added. "The fair skin, I mean. Sort of like…" Gabrielle paused.

"Like Adalei…" Alix completed. "Alix hinted at a smile. "She is fair like Adalei, yes, but looks nothing like her. You don't have such a dark complexion yourself, you know."

"Ah, that's because my father's family migrated to Greece from the west many generations ago. But we've all maintained the same characteristics… except Lila… she took more after my mother's side, which explains her darker hair."

"You never told me that." Xena remarked, finding the news a bit interesting.

"There was never really a reason to say anything about it. It was so many years ago, that we're not even sure from which part of the west we came from. It doesn't matter, we're fully Grecian now." Gabrielle smiled, "But still, it's exciting to sometimes think that my ancestors are from a different land."

"Maybe you're from Gaul as well… You'd be considered quite the beauty there." A large smile streaked across Alix's face. "You'd have your hands full…"

Gabrielle blushed, but it quickly faded, "It doesn't matter; we're all linked together in one way or another. We all have a common thread."

"Where have you heard such philosophy?" Alix questioned with interest.

"A lot of new printings are suggesting this idea of commonality between all people… some even suggest there truly is only one god."

"You're speaking of the works of Micah."

"Yes, but his writings are a reflection of his studies of Ezekiel. Many new authors do draw their inspiration from Micah and others like him. I'm impressed that you've heard of the works" Gabrielle's eyes brightened, "Do you read it as well?"

"No…" Alix quickly replied. "I have only heard it in passing. His views were not favored among my people. We do not wish for our gods to be demised."

"Neither do l. I enjoy the peacefulness it preaches."

"Then why serve a god at all?" Xena interjected. "In the east, there is the Buddha..."

"Xena, not this again. Please." Gabrielle objected, "I've told you several times that those ideas are wonderful, and very peaceful, but I find the lack of a god unsettling." Xena's mouth tightened as it shut.

"This is hardly a time to get into a religious discussion." Alix stepped forward, "I didn't mean to raise a debate."

Xena's attention shifted as she saw the chief and the dark haired woman approaching the bridge, with supplies in tow. "About time." She murmured as she moved around Gabrielle to greet the chief. "I trust everything is here?" She asked as she took two of the sacks. "I'd hate to return to my hut and realize something is missing…"

The chief handed the furs to Alix, "Nehavah."

The woman translated, "That means he has given his oath. It's his way of saying that he is a man of his word."

"Good." Xena agreed.

"Where's the daughter?" Alix asked as she took the remaining two supply sacks, "We need to get going… And I have a lot to teach her."

"What can you teach her, that she doesn't already know?" the woman asked.

"Well, our language… our customs, our ways… she can't very well function in the Empire without knowing how." Alix tossed the sacks to Xena, who loaded them upon Argo.

"I think I'm well aware of your language and ways." The woman quipped. "Perhaps, it is you that has a lot to learn."

Alix's eyes squinted, then quickly widened, "You're the…" she promptly glanced over at the chief, "Wait a minute…. You're not the chief's daughter. We saw the chief's daughter the first day we were here and she was… Well, she was not you."

"And the chief cannot have more than one daughter?"

"Look, cut the jokes, all right… You're clearly not one of the tribal people."

"You are only referring to blood." The woman answered, "There are hundreds of other ways to be connected to someone other than blood."

"I don't care if you're his daughter or not, if you want to come along, come now… if not, stay here. It doesn't matter to me." Xena climbed atop Argo. "Alix, from now she's your responsibility." She glanced down at Gabrielle and offered her hand, "Want a ride?" Gabrielle accepted the offer and took her familiar place behind Xena. "We'll see you at camp."

Alix sighed heavily, "Shall we?" She extended her arm to the woman. "It's either leave now or walk half of the way in the dark."

The woman turned and gently placed a kiss upon the chief's cheek, "A'lon."

"A'lon." The chief repeated. He gave one final look at Alix before turning and walking back towards the village.

"Don't be so sad." Alix replied, noticing the somber expression on the woman's face, "We're not leaving the borderlands for a while. You'll get to see him several more times before we leave."

"Do not tell me how to feel." The woman snapped in return. "My emotions are not your concern." She stamped off down the trail in the direction of Xena.

Appreciating her feisty response, Alix scrambled up beside her, "Hey now, we're married… you can't speak to me that way." She teased.

"Oh, you believe that marriage is power? How wonderful. You must consider yourself the husband?"

Alix cracked a grin and laughed lightly at the remark, "Well, I am supposed to protect you."

"So that gives you power?" Alix did not reply. She simply allowed her smile to fade. "I cannot deny that you are stronger than I am… a better fighter… a better hunter… I am sure you can provide excellent protection… my father is pleased with this opportunity, but do not think that I am to be a slave or beneath you…. I am not."

Alix's mouth opened and shut several times as she tried to think of a proper response, "I.. I… I'm sorry… I would never… I don't believe in slavery… I don't…"

"There's no need to stumble all over your words." The woman replied. However, Alix could tell she was satisfied with her response.

The two continued walking down the path. After a few minutes Alix spoke up again, "So, are you going to tell your name, or do I get to rename you know that you're my wife?"

A tinge of a smile flashed upon the woman's lips, "Is a name that important to you, that you cannot spend a moment with me until you know it? By knowing my name will you somehow know who I am more than you do now?

Alix shook her head in response, "I just want to know what to call you… you know, in case of an emergency… like if there was an avalanche or something… I may need to shout 'Get out of the way!'" Alix mocked by placing her hands around her mouth, "but I wouldn't know what name to yell." She ended. "How am I supposed to protect you, if I do not even know your name?"

"Eden."

"Eden…" Alix repeated the name several times, "Eden… Eden… It suits you." She concluded.

"Oh? Wonderful. You're approval was essential in the matter."

"Not much for compliments, are you?"

"You're not very well at giving them." Eden returned.

Alix let the conversation drop as they continued to hurry down the path towards camp.

**(II)**

At camp that night, Xena and Gabrielle took the opportunity to catch up on some friendly conversation, without the storm cloud of a romantic relationship hanging over their heads. They sat outside by a well-built fire, while Eden worked silently at stitching together some extra furs for herself.

"Do you think they'll try to steal our supplies again?" Gabrielle asked in a low voice, as not to have Eden overhear.

"Why? Do you think he wants to trade off more of his daughters?" Xena replied jokingly.

"I wonder why it was important to him? I feel like he took our supplies on purpose, just so he could make the offer."

"I agree with you."

"She clearly isn't his natural born daughter. Why do you think he wanted to make sure she had a protector?"

"I'd say she's the best person to ask that question."

Gabrielle chuckled, "She's not the talkative type."

"It's really none of our business. She belongs to Alix." Xena's tone gave away her amusement at the situation.

"You get a kick out of that don't you?" Gabrielle remarked. "You cherish the thought that Alix has, by lack of a better word, a wife."

"Oh, come on, Gabrielle. You know as well as I do that she'll drop Eden off in the first city we come to once we return to the Empire. Clearly, the chief wants her out of the village and somewhere he feels is safer."

"I don't know if it's that simple, Xena. He said that she would be bound to Alix."

"For a while… not forever."

"He didn't exactly mention a time frame."

"So, then why do you assume it's for more than a few months?"

"Because it's been compared to a marriage." Gabrielle's voice rose, giving away her concern over the matter. "Marriages are meant to be long lasting…"

"Gabrielle, it isn't a marriage or anything like a marriage… If it were, there would have been some type of joining ceremony." Xena assured.

"Then why didn't you agree to the arrangement? Why did you suggest Alix?"

"It's a good job for Alix. She's a natural at the protector role… she's the best suited for it."

"And you don't think it may interfere with other plans she may have?" Gabrielle frowned.

"You mean plans with you?" The lack of a response from Gabrielle confirmed Xena's question. "I guess I wasn't really thinking about that when I made the arrangement."

"What were you thinking, Xena?"

"I don't know… I'm just so used it to it be the two of us… you and I… not you and someone else…" Xena glanced away for a moment, "If I knew it was going to bother you…"

"I don't want to argue about it." Gabrielle quickly interjected. She had no desire to stir up a hateful or bitter conversation. "Alix and I are not… it's not like that… at least, it isn't for now. We'll adjust."

"Do you want to be …" Xena hesitated, "I mean, do you see yourself and Alix taking that direction? At some point…"

Gabrielle allowed herself to consider the thought, "Honestly? I only really think about being with her, when I think about not being with you." Gabrielle lowered her head, "I hate to say that… to make her sound like she is second best."

"Do you care for her?"

"Yes…" Gabrielle whispered.

"Romantically?" Xena asked calmly.

"I thought you did not wish to know our details?" Gabrielle's head lifted.

"Perhaps I should know them a bit better… so that I don't accidentally attach wives to someone that you care for." Xena swallowed heavily. "I have seen no change in your relationship towards her."

"I try not to show anything in front of you… it feels wrong." Gabrielle admitted. "Not that there has been too much to hide."

"Romantically it is then…" Xena concluded. "Of course…"

"Would I sound foolish if said that I think she loves me?" Gabrielle asked earnestly.

Xena felt a painful sting in her heart, "No, you would not sound foolish."

"She hasn't said so… with words anyway… but her actions…" Gabrielle trailed off, "I can't say that I don't appreciate her presence. I do."

"You should." Xena agreed, "If she loves you, completely, then don't deny yourself the opportunity to love her in return… believe me, that is something you do not ever want to do." Xena's voice cracked and she immediately cleared her throat, "I'll make sure that Eden realizes there's been a change of plans… I'll be her protector until we make it back to the Empire. From then on, she's on her own."

"Xena, you don't have to do that… Alix and I will …"

"No." Xena interrupted. "No. I wont take this from you." She stood to her feet, "I've taken enough…"

Gabrielle watched as Xena slowly approached Eden and spoke with her about changing protectors. Eden seemed grateful for the change and showed her enthusiasm by placing her hand on Xena's arm and smiling warmly. An action Gabrielle perceived to be more than just friendly. She immediately scolded herself for the thought. _Not every woman wants the company of another woman._ She reminded herself. _But how many would bend the rules for the chance to be with Xena?_ Again she reprimanded herself. She immediately shook off the concerns when she saw Alix approaching the campsite with extra firewood in her arms.

"Gabrielle, could you open the door to the hut for me? I'd like to go ahead and place this inside."

"Sure." Gabrielle stood to her feet, opened the door for Alix, and followed her inside, shutting the door behind them. "There's something you should know." She began.

Alix dropped the firewood into a wooden box by the chimney, and then dusted herself off. She rose to her feet and gave her attention to Gabrielle, "What's that?"

"Xena decided to remove you from the position of Eden's protector. She's going to take care of her until we get to the Empire."

A look of surprise streaked across Alix's face, "Was that her idea?"

"Yes…" Gabrielle replied, "And no…"

"You talked to her?"

"Briefly… I didn't even have it in mind to discuss with her, but she seemed happy to have burdened with you the task and I…" Gabrielle shook her head, "I expressed my displeasure with it, is all. I told her we would adjust, but she was intent on taking Eden. And Eden seems very taken by Xena." Gabrielle wittingly remarked.

"Ah, I imagine so. She wasn't very taken by me." Alix smiled. "Can't say I was smitten with her much either. In fact, I was dreading every moment of it… It simply never would have worked out. We were headed straight for divorce."

Gabrielle smirked, "Well, contrary to what Xena believes, I think she's better suited for the role than you. She could benefit from having Eden around."

"You mean to replace you?" Alix inquired.

"I just mean that having four instead of three will make things easier. Xena won't be alone and she'll have someone to look out for… a reason and purpose and duty…" Gabrielle slowly stepped towards Alix, "Wouldn't you agree that Xena has more time to devote to such a task?"

"Oh, I see…" Alix replied as she welcomed the bard closer by wrapping her into an embrace. "You were jealous of all the time I would have to spend with my fake wife."

"I wouldn't say jealous…" Gabrielle disputed. "Concerned would be more appropriate."

"Concerned." Alix laughed. She raised her hand to Gabrielle's cheek and gently brushed it with the backs of her fingers, "I never thought you'd ever be concerned over me." She whispered.

Gabrielle lifted her hand and took hold of Alix's, "What a silly thing to think…"

Alix slowly lowered her head until her lips met Gabrielle's. She felt a rush of energy explode through her body, but on the outside she appeared calm and steady. She pulled Gabrielle closer, and their kiss became more passionate. Gabrielle wrapped her hands around Alix's neck, and felt the taller woman lift her from the floor. Gabrielle pulled away and gasped for a breath, but could not resist smiled. Alix lowered them easily onto Gabrielle's bedroll and gently positioned herself on top of her. Again, their lips met and both women felt the intensity of the other's body.

"Alix…" Gabrielle managed to breath between kisses. "We have to stop…"

Alix groaned remorsefully and continued her kissing, but this time placing her lips upon Gabrielle's neck, ears, and chest. Gabrielle felt her muscles tighten at Alix's touch and it became increasingly obvious where Alix wanted to go. Gabrielle's mind raced to the thought of Xena and Eden, who were only a few feet away outside. There was certainly no privacy in the hut and one of them could decide to open the door at any second.

"Alix. No." Gabrielle gently pushed the woman off of her, but kept her close enough so that they were both laying on the bedroll, "This is not the time…"

Alix swallowed heavily, her eyes searching Gabrielle's wildly, "I find it hard to care." She replied; her voice drenched in desperation.

"Not now." Gabrielle reinforced. She leaned in quickly and placed a kiss upon Alix's lips. "It isn't right."

Alix exhaled deeply and regained control of herself. A trace of embarrassment lingered, but she let it go when she realized that Gabrielle was not judging her for her actions. "I'm sorry."

"Don't be sorry. Be patient." Gabrielle smiled.


	11. XI

**(I)**

"Like this?" Eden inquired as she gripped the sword.

"Yes, now, hold it out from your side, and move your left leg backwards. You have to learn to parry if you expect to be even somewhat successful." Eden followed her instructor's commands and suddenly took the form of a warrior ready to deflect any oncoming attacks. "Good… Now, I'm going to attempt to attack you… you block my sword with your own, but don't allow yourself to lose your position."

"O-okay…" Eden replied with uncertainty as she tried to imagine how to accomplish such a feat.

"Ready?" Xena asked. Eden nodded her head, but was surprised when Xena did not subsequently attack. Xena slowly took a step to the right, which left her facing Eden at an awkward angle. Intuitionally, Eden turned so that she was facing the warrior head on once more. Pleased with the woman's natural response, Xena began circling the younger woman, monitoring her closely as she continued to adjust to each step.

"Xena, really, how long are you going to tease me? You're making me quite anxious." Eden's voice hinged on the very edge of seduction, indicating the underlying meaning behind her selected words.

"You must learn to anticipate the first move." Xena answered. "If you allow yourself to lower your guard, even for a moment, your opponent will have you at his will."

Eden sighed dreadfully, "I don't understand while we're even wasting our time. I've never been able to wield a sword… I do not understand why you suddenly think it's a spectacular idea."

Xena maintained in teacher mode, "I will not always be there to protect you, you need to learn basic survival tactics."

"Yes, well, that was not part of the agreement you made with my father." Eden quipped. "You are bound to me, Xena, as protector, not instructor."

"When we return to the Empire, you'll need to protect yourself." Xena replied casually.

Eden laughed lightly, "Do you not understand the pretense of the agreement you made with the chief? I am bound to you."

"It's not the same as marriage…" 

"It is of it's own right, but akin to marriage nonetheless." Eden objected.

"Don't be ridiculous." Xena lowered her sword and narrowed her eyes, "We are not joined." Xena emphasized.

"You're going back on your word." Eden gripped her sword tightly. "My father placed his trust in you, and now you're going to dishonor him?"

"Your father stole my supplies right from under my own hut, and then bribed me into taking his daughter in order to get them back." Xena spat.

Eden threw the sword down onto the cold ground; it clanged loudly against the hard, compacted surface. "Would you have agreed by any other terms?" she demanded.

Xena eyed the sword and then stared at the woman, "I will protect you while you are in my care, but you cannot stay with me when we return to the Empire. If it is marriage you seek, there are husbands in Rome."

Eden could taste the bitterness forming in her conscious. "You've disappointed me." She finally stated. "I thought better of you."

"That is unfortunate." Xena replied. "We'll practice again tomorrow. That's enough for today. Pack a light bag, we're taking an overnight trip." With that, Xena turned and began walking back towards the hut.

Gabrielle spotted the raven-haired warrior marching up the path. Instantly, her curiosity peaked as to what the warrior was doing out in the field with Eden. She imagined that Xena was teaching her something, for it was like Xena to play the educator role. Surprisingly, though she found herself curious, she lacked the jealousy she assumed would normally have followed.

"Gabrielle, I'm going to ride out and check on Adalei this afternoon. I intend to spend the night at the safe house, I'll be back tomorrow." Xena began gathering supplies. "Don't worry, I plan to take Eden with me. I'm sure her knowledge of the land will prove useful."

Gabrielle was taken aback by Xena's sudden announcement. She hadn't assumed that Xena was considering paying a visit to the safe house. "We could all go… if you'd like. It may be good for Alix to see her."

Xena's eyes shot up, "No. We can't leave the hut unguarded. Besides, I don't Alix would be up for the reunion."

Gabrielle nodded, realizing that Xena's response was highly logical. She had only suggested the idea out of uncertainty of what else to say. A fleeting thought raced across her mind as she wondered if Xena was intentionally leaving she and Alix alone, so they could spend the time together and without restraint.

"I'll speak with Alix before we leave." Xena grabbed the backpack that Alix had purchased for her a few weeks before. "If something happens, just trust Alix. She'll know what to do." Xena paused for a moment as she held eye contact with Gabrielle, but then turned and loaded her pack onto Argo. Eden was slowly walking up the path, as Alix stepped out of the hut. Xena pulled the other warrior aside and began conversing about her plans.

Gabrielle smiled politely as Eden came closer to the camp. "Looks like you're heading out for the night…"

Eden glanced over at Xena, "Not like I was giving much of a choice."

"You'd rather not go?" Gabrielle asked.

Eden was hesitant to respond; "I don't know… she just has this way about her that makes me want to rebel and surrender at the same time. It's driving me mad."

Finding this comment strange, yet interesting, Gabrielle offered some friendly advice, "If you can learn to do both, you'll have mastered her." Gabrielle lowered her voice, "If you'd honestly prefer not to go, I can talk to Xena. I wouldn't mind making the trip in your place."

"No." Eden immediately replied. "I'll stay with her." She turned quickly and grabbed her pack.

After finishing up their conversation, Alix stepped away from Xena and moved towards Gabrielle. They stood beside each other and watched as Xena and Eden took off together on Argo. Gabrielle's eyes focused on Eden, who was riding in her spot atop Argo. How off it felt to see another in her place.

"What's the matter, Gabrielle?" Alixandriah asked thoughtfully as she slowly placed an arm around the bard.

Gabrielle's head turned slightly so that she could face Alix, "It feels odd…" Gabrielle honestly admitted. "She hasn't gone many places without me… she's never really taken anyone else besides me…"

Alix smiled briefly, "But now we're alone." She reminded. "For the first time in a while."

"Are you curious about Adalei's condition?" Gabrielle asked, swiftly shifting the subject.

Alix noticed the intentional topic change and responded to it delicately, "I hope that Xena finds her well."

"Do you miss her?"

"Not when I'm with you." Alix's honesty surprised herself as much as it did Gabrielle.

Impressed by the frankness of her response, Gabrielle felt compelled to confess her true feelings as well. "I miss Xena, sometimes…"

"I know." Alix replied with a hint of a smile.

"And when I remind myself that I cannot be with her…" Gabrielle paused. She wanted to say, _that's when I'm the most thankful that I have you. _But she quickly realized that Alix could easily misunderstand her meaning or even worse, understand it perfectly.

Alix's voice softened, "Gabrielle, I know that it's something you still struggle with. I watch you battle with it every day."

"I don't want it to interfere." Gabrielle took Alix's hand in her own. "It's a burden… it weighs down my heart and clutters my mind."

Alix shook her head, showing that she understood. "I've assumed as much. It's why you're so hesitant about moving forward with me." Alix licked her lips nervously before continuing, "So, I've thought about it…. It's not presumable that you'll ever get over your feelings for Xena if you're forced to spend every day with her."

Gabrielle's head snapped up, "What are you proposing?"

"A break." Alix replied simply. "A vacation… time away."

"A break from Xena…" Gabrielle compiled the thoughts. "Leave her?"

Alix could tell the idea did not set well with the bard, but it did not hinder her attempt to make Gabrielle see the benefit of distance between herself and Xena. "Consider it. We could head out before solstice, and visit some of the villages in Gaul. I have friends there; we can spend the rest of winter safely. Then in the spring, we'll head back to the Empire, meet up with Xena, and help Eden find a nice mate…" Alix tacked on a smile to show her extra enthusiasm for the idea.

"Xena could use the time to teach Eden about survival." Gabrielle pondered the thought, "Do you really think that it will be safe in Gaul?"

"For the two of us, absolutely. It was only a threat when Adalei was part of the group." Alix explained. "I think a short time apart would do you both well. Don't put yourself through any more grief, Gabrielle. Let the wound heal."

Gabrielle smirked, "You'd say anything to convince me to go off with you."

Alix eyed Gabrielle's face for several moments before replying, "Is it working? I'm prepared to beg…" Alix quickly dropped to her knees, triggering a giggly response from Gabrielle.

"Get up." Gabrielle replied in amusement as she gently tugged at Alix's shirt collar, "You don't have to beg."

Alix rose to her feet, "Does that mean you'll go?"

"Only for the rest of winter." Gabrielle pointed out. "I don't think we should stay separated from Xena long, it's not the safest idea."

"Don't fret over Caesar." Alix reassured. "He'll not harm you. You have my word."

"It's not just Caesar. There are numerous reasons why it's safest to travel with Xena. Plus, I worry about Adalei and her unborn baby… and now I find myself worrying over Eden and what will happen to her once we reach the Empire… How we have gotten involved in so many lives in such a short time?"

Alix thought carefully before responding to Gabrielle's concerns, "I brought you into all of this. It's my fault that you've fled the Empire."

"I don't regret that, Alix. I just hope that we're making the right decisions."

**(II)**

At the safe house, Adalei had been waiting patiently for a visit from Alix and her friends, but so far they had not lived up to their promise. She was beginning to lose hope of ever seeing them again, until the evening she spotted Xena riding towards the safe house with a young woman nestled behind her.

"Xena…" Adalei mouthed the name from the window of the house, and then quickly turned to run down the stairs. She greeted the warrior warmly, as they met out in front of the safe house. She hugged Xena tightly for several moments before finally pulling away, "I'm so glad you came. I thought you wouldn't."

"I would have come sooner, but the weather has been terrible for traveling." Xena glanced back at Eden and pulled her forward. "This is Eden. She's the daughter of one of the chieftain's. We're looking out for her for a while."

Adalei's eyes fell upon the younger beauty, "I see." She replied simply. Immediately her mind filled with questions and accusations about the woman and what she was doing among the trio.

"How are you? Have you had any problems?" Xena asked as they began to travel inside, and out of the colder winter weather.

"I've been well." Adalei's eyes softened. "They've been very kind to me here. There's been no threat of Caesar…"

"Good to hear." Xena smiled. "Eden and I were thinking of spending the night tonight, then heading out at first light tomorrow."

"Really?" Adalei's voice gave away her shock. "That would be lovely, Xena. I would cherish the opportunity."

Adalei led them into her own bedroom, and closed the door behind them. "Would you like some wine?" Adalei asked as she invited them to take a seat in a couple of chairs she had sitting by her bed. "I don't drink it, of course. Many healers say that it can be bad for the baby, so you're more than welcome to the entire bottle."

Eden graciously accepted the offer, "I could use a drink." She stated dryly as she took the bottle for Adalei's hands.

Xena instantly grabbed the bottle from Eden's grasp. "We'll have water… or tea if you have any." She set the bottle aside and gave Eden a straightforward look of warning.

"I could make some tea." Adalei quickly began gathering her cups and teapot. She kindled the fire inside the hearth of her room. "So, I take it Alixandriah did not wish to see me." Adalei asked the question over her shoulder while she continued at her task.

"She's still hurting." Xena replied.

"Hurting…." Adalei repeated. "Well, she isn't the only one." 

Eden watched Xena's response carefully, taking great interest in the matter. "I cannot speak for her further." Xena hoped that this would be enough to subdue the questioning.

"Will you take a message for her, then?" Adalei turned and reached for a small bag by her bedside. As she turned back to face Xena, she pulled out a scroll. "I wrote this letter a few days ago, and I thought that I would have to send it by a messenger in the spring, but with you arriving here today, you could take it to her."

Xena took the scroll, "Of course."

"Thank you." Adalei poured the three of them a cup of tea and took a seat on the bed. "So, Eden, you must tell me all about yourself." She smiled.

"There isn't much to say." Eden replied as she sipped her tea. "I'm quite the bore, really."

"On the contrary." Adalei remarked. "I'd never believe you were a chieftain's daughter, considering how unique differences from most of the tribal people I've seen around these parts."

"So you noticed?" Eden asked sarcastically, knowing everyone was well aware of her stark difference from the tribes. "Funny how you're kind never seem to consider adoption as a possibility."

"Kidnapped may be a more accurate word…"

"Adalei." Xena broke into the conversation. "Don't be so hard on our new friend."

Adalei leaned back across the bed, "Merely making an observation. I apologize."

"If you must know," Eden sighed, "I was rescued by the tribe when I was a little girl. My parents, my real parents, were traveling through the borderlands and an evil tribe attacked them… attacked us." Eden clarified. "My father killed so many of them, but there were countless heathens coming at us in all directions. My mother and I took off running from the battle. We didn't make it far until we realized another tribe was swiftly approaching us. At first we assumed that they were after us as well, but then they began fighting with the heathen tribe attacked. It was too late for my father, he died protecting my mother and I, but the tribe was able to save my mother and me."

Xena's eyes were fixated on the young woman. It was the most she had spoken about her past since Xena had met her. "And your mother? I never saw her with the chief."

"She was a part of the tribe for a while." Eden cleared her throat and continued, "We had no where else to go… no one else to help us…. My father was dead… they offered us a home." Eden stared into the warm hearth as she proceeded. "My mother married the chief a couple years later, and I've been his daughter ever since. They were very happy together until the winter she took ill."

"You don't have to continue." Adalei interrupted, as she realized the story was painful for Eden to recount. "I think I can put it together from here."

"I ended up with Xena because my father knows that the heathen tribe is planning to attack soon."

Eden's sudden confession caused Xena's head to jerk. "There's going to be an attack in the borderlands and you haven't told me?"

"You haven't asked…" Eden defended. "Or cared about anything, really… All you've managed to speak about is how I must learn to live on my own when you drop me off by the roadside."

Adalei shook her head, "I've heard talk about a hostile tribe in the north, but they haven't attacked in years."

Eden scoffed, "You mean they haven't attacked the safe house in years."

"Who, exactly, do they plan on attacking?" Xena asked.

"Anyone who stands in their way." Eden answered simply. "They've been peaceful for far too long. Father believes it is because they are strengthening their warriors."

"And what is it that they want? The borderland?"

"What else?" Eden raised her eyebrow, "They have battled in those fields for hundreds of years, each tribe claims ownership of the land. It's preposterous… My father's ancestors clearly have right to the land, but it's a beautiful land and resources are plentiful here."

"Eden, we can't afford to be in any battles… We're not prepared… We do not wish to take part in it." Xena rambled on, "If we had known…"

"Relax, Xena." Eden interjected. "No one is expecting your assistance in the battle, that is why my father made his agreement with you. If we are attacked, we must leave immediately. You must protect me. That is the deal."

Adalei laughed lightly, "Well, lose one young woman, gain another…." She glanced over at Xena, "I'm sure Alix doesn't mind being bothered with this one."

"No, Alix is quite taken already by the young blonde." Eden returned.

Xena's face went blank as she awaited Adalei's reaction. Adalei stared at Eden for several moments, trying to decide if her words could be accurate. When she finally turned her attention to Xena, she knew she had heard the remark correctly.

"Alix and Gabrielle?" She asked the warrior. Her voice was tiny, like that of a small child.

Xena frowned, "Things have changed quite a bit since we've seen you last."

"It appears that way." Alix's eyes narrowed and she immediately reached a hand to her stomach. "Damn this beast…." She whispered. "Damn you…." She added as her eyes shot back to Xena. "How could you let something like that happen? Do you not care for Gabrielle at all?"

"I cannot help what has been done. Gabrielle and I have talked. We have resolved our issues." Xena slowly stood to her feet, "Perhaps we should leave…"

"They are there alone…." Alix stated, as her jaw clinched. "At the hut. And I know Alixandriah well enough to know that she does not waste an opportunity alone with her lover. _Still hurting_, you spewed to me… what a crock. I'm sure she's feeling pretty wonderful at the moment."

An unwelcomed risqué image popped into Xena's mind. She quickly batted it away and tried to forget the idea that Adalei had so forcefully brought to light. "We'll head back to the hut tonight…."

"The hell we will…" Eden exclaimed as she jumped to her feet. "Xena, I refuse to get back on that horse. You have forced me along on this journey and now that I am in a warm room with a bed, I will not simply give it up and return to camp in the middle of a cold winter night."

Adalei and Xena both stared impressively at the younger woman's rant. Xena knew that there was not much she could say in return to such an abrasive declaration.

"Of course, don't be ridiculous, Xena. You're more than welcome to stay here tonight." Adalei lowered her head. "I am sorry. Please do not take my anger over Alix as any ill feelings towards you."

"Isn't it about dinner time?" Xena asked, taking the opportunity to change the subject.

"Yes, it is." Adalei smiled faintly. "I'm sure we're having something delicious… Let's go see, shall we?" She turned and opened the door, holding it open for Xena and Eden to step through.

**(III)**

Gabrielle threw a couple more pieces of wood into the fireplace, now content that it would stay bright and warm for a while. She felt the familiar touch of Alix's arm gently finding its way around her waist.

"Finished with the outside chores already?" Gabrielle asked without turning around.

"Not as much to care for when there's only one horse." Alix reminded as she pulled the bard closer. "Need any help in here?"

Gabrielle leaned her body back against Alix. She allowed herself to stay comfortable there for a moment before replying, "No, I've finished everything."

"Then we can call it an early night." Alix spun the blonde around. "How about a story?"

"A story? Which one?" Gabrielle playfully inquired.

"One of my own. One that I've written for you." Alix pulled Gabrielle towards her bedroll. "Sit here… I'll get it for you." Alix returned quickly with a scroll in hand. "I could read it aloud…. Or just hand it to you if you prefer."

Gabrielle chuckled, "I'd love to hear you narrate."

"All right…" Alix unfolded the scroll and cleared her throat. "Once, not so long ago, the great goddess Aphrodite decided that she would share he wisdom and grant one human being the opportunity to know true love, as she knew it." Alix paused and glanced over at the attentive Gabrielle, "Like it so far?" She asked.

"Yes. Keep going." Gabrielle commanded as she waited eagerly for the rest.

Alix smirked and then continued, "Aphrodite scavenged the earth in search of the perfect person to fulfill her goal. She hunted as far and wide as possible, evaluated nearly every single human being, and then suddenly realized that none of them were truly worthy to know love as she knew it. This left Aphrodite feeling extremely sad for all of humanity, for they would never know what was meant by the words, 'true love.' Before giving up hope, Aphrodite remembered the gentle nature of a bard that she had come into contact with before; a young Potidaean girl with a heart a gold and hair to match Perhaps this young woman would be worthy of experiencing true love. If not, she would certainly be the closest contestant. When Aphrodite swept down to Earth in the form of an eagle, she followed the young Potidaean around for several days; thus, determining that she was truly worthy of the goddess' gift. As she cast her love spell upon the young woman while she slept, she must have accidentally recited the wrong words, for when the sleeping beauty awakened, not only did she feel and understand the meaning of true love, but also she radiated of it. This warm, glowing light that surrounded the young woman touched all who met her. By being in her presence alone, one could feel the warmth of love emanating from her. From that moment forward, Aphrodite's love began to spread through all who met the Potidaean, causing countless hearts to turn from black. At first, the goddess assumed she had made a mistake, but shortly after she realized what a splendid thing was occurring. For once, humanity was experiencing love the way it was meant to be experienced…. Unconditionally. What a wonderful change to ensue the world, right when it seemed the darkest…. Gods bless the Potidaean girl, without whom, I would never know unconditional love."

Gabrielle felt the heat rush to her face and though she wanted desperately to reply, she had trouble finding any words to speak. She searched for any phrase that would be thoughtful enough, but every comment paled in comparison to the beautiful writing she had just heard.

"That's the end." Alix added as she began rolling up the scroll. "You can keep it, if you like." She awkwardly handed over the roll.

"Alix, I can't think of anything to say to you other than…." Gabrielle paused, "Thank you… thank you so much." She reached over and took the scroll, "I'll keep it with me always."

"It's not exactly a myth or fairytale… but it's a start." Alix swallowed heavily, "I'm a little rusty with my writing, I hadn't done anything for so long, and …"

"It was wonderful, Alix. I loved it." Gabrielle soothed as she scooted closer to the taller woman and took her hand. "I wish I had something that special to give to you."

"You do." Alix replied squeezing the bard's hand gently. "Every day with you is special, Gabrielle. So special." Alix leaned in closer and softly placed a kiss on Gabrielle's lips, "I…I…" Alix hesitated to continue.

"I know…" Gabrielle replied in a low whisper as she used her free hand to touch Alix's cheek. "I know you do."

"I can't help it… from the moment I met you…." Alix's voice softened more with each stammered phrase, "I can't resist you."

"You don't have to…" Gabrielle pressed her lips against Alix's. They kissed for several minutes, each one more passionate than the one before, "I'm sorry things have been so complicated." Gabrielle managed to squeeze in before another session began.

"You're worth it…." Alix breathed quickly as she slowly began unbuttoning her shirt.

"Am I?" Gabrielle inhaled just as heavily as she frantically assisted Alix with her buttons. Her body ached to be touched, to be caressed and she had grown tired of denying it its only desire.

"Absolutely." Alix gasped as she felt Gabrielle's warm hands slide in through her shirt and brush against her naked sides."

"Even though I'm in love with Xena?" Gabrielle paused and stared steadily into the eyes of her new partner. She knew the answer to this question would seal the deal one way, or the other. It was the moment that would determine the future of their relationship, or whether there was to even be a future.

"Is she the only one you're ever going to allow yourself to love?" Alix asked, holding eye contact with the blonde.

Gabrielle took a few moments before replying, "No..."

"Then it's worth it." Alix pulled Gabrielle towards her and enveloped her in a passionate embrace. Alix allowed her hands to travel freely over her latest lover's body. Gabrielle felt the burning intensity in each of Alix's touches, and in the back of her mind she relentlessly explained to herself how Xena could never fulfill these desires.

"Alix, I've only ever been with one person…" Gabrielle began, "And he… well…" She didn't finish.

"It's all right." Alix pushed a stray hair away from Gabrielle's face, "We'll take our time." She smiled. "Learning is the best part."

Alix removed her shirt and was beginning to unlace Gabrielle's when the sudden sound of a several horses galloping towards the hut caught both women's attention.

Gabrielle looked towards the door of the hut, "What in Tartarus is that?"

"Who is the more likely question." Alix remarked as she grabbed her shirt and quickly buttoned it. "Stay here, I'll take a look." Alix reached for her sword and moved towards the door.

"Alix, be careful. Don't try to take on an army." Gabrielle warned as she began re-lacing her shirt.

Alix swung open the door to reveal a small group of tribal warriors standing in a semicircle around their hut. "May I help you?" Alix asked.

The main leader of the group stepped forward, "Ni'ling." He stated boldly. "Ni'ling!" he repeated.

"I don't understand." Alix gripped her sword tightly. "You should leave. I can't help you."

The tribe talked amongst itself and then the leader took another step forward. This time, he spotted Gabrielle creeping up beside Alix in the doorway. "Ha'nah…. Ha'nah shu opala!" he pointed to the bard.

Alix instinctually put an arm in front of Gabrielle and stepped forward slightly, to show her protection of the girl, "Don't worry, Gabbie. I'll handle this."

"Ha'nah…" The man repeated. He looked back the other men in his tribe who were now jumping down from their horses and stepping up behind him. Each pulled out a weapon and held it plainly for Alix and Gabrielle to see.

"Alix…" Gabrielle's voice shook, "What do they want?"

"I don't know." Alix answered anxiously. She spoke louder to the leader, "I warn you. Go away." The leader took several more steps towards the hut. Alix raised her sword and pointed it towards the man, "I said, leave!"

The man's eyes focused on Gabrielle. "Ha'nah…" he snarled. "Shu ji undon." He pointed at Gabrielle again, this time aiming more towards her neck.

"My necklace?" Gabrielle asked as she clenched at the piece of jewelry. "You want my necklace?"

"Ha'nah."

"Ha'nah… necklace…." Gabrielle concluded. "Here… here, take it." She immediately began to fiddle with the latch until she had removed it from her neck. She attempted to take hand it over to the man, but he backed away quickly when she approached him. "

"Gabrielle, stop." Alix reached for the bard, pulling her back inside the hut. "You can't just throw yourself at him."

"Give him the necklace, if that's what he wants; give it to him. It's not worth dying over, Alix."

"He doesn't want the necklace… he's afraid of it." Alix snatched the jewelry from Gabrielle's grasp. She shook it in the direction of the tribe and all the men backed away quickly and coward from its presence. "It must mean something to them."

"The carvings…" Gabrielle pointed out. "Perhaps they're a symbol for something…"

"Perhaps." Alix agreed. She held up the jewelry and approached the group of men, her sword ready by her side. "Get out of here!" She shouted. "Get!" she shook the necklace in their faces, and immediately the men jumped atop their horses and began to ride away. "That's right, you bastards! Leave or I'll slap you with my necklace!"

Gabrielle slapped Alix's arms, "Alix, don't make light of this. They're dangerous."

"Dangerous all right." Alix laughed, "Frightened of a piece of jewelry."

Gabrielle reached for the necklace and snapped it back on around her neck, "It's only a matter of time before they return."

"And when they do return, they'll bring more with them." Alix added as she led Gabrielle inside the hut and closed the door behind them.

"What do we do?"

"What else can we do? We leave." Alix replied grimly. "Tonight."

Gabrielle's eyes widened and her mouth gaped open, "Tonight? Alix, Xena and Eden are at the safe house, we can't just leave without them…."

"We do not have a choice, Gabrielle. Those men are part of a different tribe… a hostile tribe… if we stay here, we'll be sitting ducks. We can't just keep waving your necklace at them until they get tired and leave."

"Then we should gather our supplies and head towards the safe house. We can warn the others."

"We don't have time. Xena will be fine… and she'll take care of Eden… Lets' go to Gaul. We'll send word to Xena when we can." Alix swallowed heavily, knowing her suggestion was a long shot.

"Alix, I can't just leave without saying goodbye… without warning Xena what's happening." Gabrielle sighed softly, "And then there's Adalei… we can't let harm come to her and her baby. We can't be that selfish."

"You're right." Alix finally admitted. "It is selfish…" She grabbed her pack, "I hope Adalei still has that mare I gave her; we'll need it for sure with five of us traveling. Of course, I don't know where the hell we'll be going… Having Adalei knocks Gaul out of the question, we can't return to the Empire yet, and the borderlands aren't safe… Zeus' sake, the only place left to go is farther north!"

Gabrielle was deeply relieved that Alix was willing to compromise, "We'll still take our vacation… some time. I'd love to see Gaul… I want you to show me. And as for where we'll go, we'll figure it out. If we have to go farther north, we will."

Alix exhaled heavily as she began packing supplies, "I'd rather take my chances in the Empire and give Caesar what's already coming to him."

"Whatever happens, we're in this together…" Gabrielle reached over and took Alix's hand. "We'll get through it." Alix pulled the blonde into her and held her closely. "We'll have to ride all night to reach the safe house by morning." Gabrielle mumbled against Alix's chest.

"Then that's what we'll do." Alix held the woman at arm's reach and looked down at her thoughtfully, "You truly have the purest heart I know, Gabrielle. I have a lot to learn from you."

"Learning is the best part." Gabrielle teased as she brushed by the taller woman and began gathering her own supplies.


	12. XII

_A/N: First and foremost, I owe a HUGE apology to all of you guys. I'm terribly sorry that I have postponed updating this long. I was not expecting to be so busy these last few weeks. Thank you all for your reviews and for going on this journey with me. : ) Happy Holidays to all! _

_A. _

**(I) **

"Gabbie." Alix whispered softly into the blonde's ear. "Wake up. We're here."

Gabrielle's eyes slowly fluttered open as she saw the safe house gradually come into view amidst the cold, foggy, haze of early morning. "I didn't realize I'd fallen asleep." Gabrielle yawned.

"You have been for a while." Alix smiled. "I'm glad you got to rest, you'll need your strength for the next few hours. We'll need to optimize our escape time. If the tribe does intend to attack the borderlands, we'll need to be as far away as possible."

"Do you think Eden's father knew this?" Gabrielle pondered. "That's why he wanted us to take her?"

"It's more than a safe bet, I'd say." Alix replied. "But whose safer hands to be in than Xena's, eh?"

A faint smile crossed Gabrielle's lips. It faded quickly as she wrapped her coat more tightly around here in an effort to reserve warmth. "With five of us traveling, Xena will have her hands full."

"Six if you count Adalei's little bundle of joy." Alix snidely remarked.

Gabrielle's head snapped back, "Alix, please don't treat Adalei anymore harshly than you already have."

Alix let out a frustrated sigh, "I don't intend to, Gabrielle, but surely you must understand my animosity towards the situation…"

"I believe in repentance. I believe in forgiveness." Gabrielle answered earnestly. "I think she made a mistake and now she has to reap the spoiled harvest. There is nothing more you can say to her that would matter; it certainly will not undo what has been done. A child is a beautiful thing. It possesses new life and purity that we all strive to achieve. More importantly, it's an innocent and does not deserve any blame for your ill feelings."

Alix's lip curled in what appeared to be an attempt to hold back an angry remark, "You speak as if I should have stepped up and been a father figure to it."

Gabrielle was hesitant to reply, "Would that have been the worst thing, if it had kept you together? Perhaps even brought you closer?"

"Kept us together?" Alix repeated bitterly. "Why are you saying such things? I don't want to be with her, Gabrielle, I want to be with you."

Gabrielle hung her head and did not respond. They were too close to the safe house now to be continuing this conversation. As Alixandriah dismounted her horse, she assisted Gabrielle down as well and they both were surprised to see Xena standing in the safe house doorway.

"We're you expecting us?" Alixandriah asked as she moved towards the other warrior.

Xena leaned against the inside of the doorframe with her arms crossed, "No… But I heard you coming about half a candle mark ago."

Alix nodded her head, "So, you've been here waiting for us…"

Xena leaned away from the door, "Yes, well, I'm very curious as to why you've left our hut and our supplies unguarded…"

Gabrielle noticed the tension in Xena's voice immediately, "Xena, we had to leave. There's another tribe in the borderlands. They're not friendly…"

"So I've heard." Xena added. "I was planning on riding back this morning…"

"We couldn't have waited that long." Alix interrupted. "They would have been back then. In fact, I bet they're following us now."

"Then you're a fool for leading them to the safe house." Xena quipped.

Alix felt her fists ball up at the remark, "I'm sure they're already well aware of its existence."

"Well, they are now…" Xena eye Gabrielle and brushed by Alix. "Gabrielle, were you able to bring any of our supplies?"

Gabrielle's mouth gaped open momentarily, but they she quickly replied, "Uh, um, not much..." She cleared her throat, "We were able to carry very little on Tallus."

"I'll have to check how much coin we have. Hopefully it will be enough to purchase supplies for a nearby merchant."

"I have plenty of coin." Alix stated assertively. She reached for her money sack tied to her belt. She threw it in Xena's direction. "Since it's my fault we've lost our supplies, I should at least replenish them."

Gabrielle sensed the sudden unfriendliness between the two warriors and wondered why now, at this moment in the journey, they were suddenly finding it hard to cooperate.

"Gabrielle, go wake up Eden and Adalei. Tell them to pack and be ready in less than half a candle mark. I'll need to speak to the rest of the safe house and let them know they must seek shelter elsewhere. Alix, begin preparing the horses. And that includes the mare you gave to Adalei."

Alix's jaw stiffened at Xena's list of demands. Usually, she'd have no problem with following the warrior's leader type role, but on this particular winter morning she found it quite obnoxious.

"When everyone has finished, we'll meet back here at the stable." Xena stepped aside and headed back towards the safe house.

Alix and Gabrielle shared a short exchange of glances before Gabrielle turned and headed to the safe house as well to complete her assigned task. Alix kicked at the cold, frosty ground a few times before finally heading to the stables to prepare the horses.

Gabrielle lightly knocked on the door. She found herself almost afraid of who was waiting on the other side. As the door cautiously opened, Adalei's surprised face peeked through the crack.

"Gabrielle?"

"There's going to be an attack. We have to leave." Gabrielle stated simply.

"An attack?" Adalei repeated, gaining the attention of Eden who was now by the doorway as well.

"The Kopas." Eden spoke softly.

"Is that the tribe?" Adalei asked. "The one you were talking about last night?"

Eden nodded, "They've come sooner than I expected."

"So it appears the safe house is not very safe at all, is it?" Adalei asked, her voice tightening. She glanced back at Gabrielle; a brief thought of she and Alix together flashed infront of her mind's eye and she quickly stormed away from the doorway and began gathering her belongings. "I should have stayed in the Empire. I should have never allowed myself to lower my guard… to anyone."

"Well, if you've missed the Empire so much, then I'm sure you'll be happy that we'll be returning there." Eden replied.

Adalei and Gabrielle's heads both shot up at the comment. Adalei was the first to speak, "What makes you think we're going back to the Empire?"

"It's the only place to go. Nowhere in Germania is going to escape the great battle that lies ahead. But the war will not leak into the Empire. The Romans are very, very effective at keeping the barbarians out of their lands. It's the safest place to be." 

"Except for the fact that the Emperor wants to kill me." Adalei shot back, her eyes becoming larger with each passing moment.

"My, you are unlucky, aren't you?" Eden shook her head.

"Xena will figure something out." Gabrielle interjected. "Just be ready… quickly. We're leaving soon."

"I'm ready." Eden replied as she stepped towards Gabrielle and followed her out of the room. When they were a safe distance away, Eden placed her hand on Gabrielle's shoulder, slowing their pace. "You feel guilty," she stated. "You're eaten alive with shame."

Gabrielle's eyes wandered, "I'm not ashamed."

Eden laughed lightly, "Facing Alixandriah's old lover face to face…" She stepped infront of the bard, "How could you not be ashamed?"

"I haven't done anything with Alix." Gabrielle replied with a hardening tone. "If that's what you're inferring."

"You mean you haven't had sex with her?" Eden truly sounded surprised. "Really?"

"That surprises you that much, does it?" Gabrielle folded her arms.

"Actually… yes." Eden's demeanor softened. "Alix certainly seems like the type of girl who doesn't take no for an answer. I imagined she had forced your legs apart the very first night. Not that she is violent, mind you!" Eden quickly clarified, "Her force is not physical… she'd charm her way under your skirt."

Gabrielle scoffed lightly and rolled her eyes, "Well, she didn't. So there's nothing to talk about." She stepped around Eden and continued down the stairs.

Meanwhile Xena and Alix were discussing the near future's plans of escaping from the borderlands. Alix had found herself more annoyed with Xena as their conversation, and disagreements, continued.

"Hades in Tartarus, Xena, I am not returning to the Empire." Alix's forceful tone took over.

"Going North is not the answer, Alixandriah. We'll be trapped up there, with the battle lying between us and getting home. It's not an option."

"Then I say we return to Gaul. I have friends there… we'll be safe enough if we keep Adalei at a distance…"

Xena shook her head as he lips pierced together, "Friends who would sell us out at the drop of a dinar. And we're not leaving Adalei to fend for herself in Gaul."

Gabrielle, Eden, and Adalei stepped into the stables in time to hear the bitter argument unfolding between the warriors.

"Then what say you, Xena? Shall we assassinate, Caesar?" Alix threw up her hands, "I'd love to have the chance. I'd have done it long ago had your army done what it was supposed to do."

Xena's eyes narrowed, "My army kept your army from disintegrating."

"_Your _army got in _my_ way!" Alix huffed. "My goal was to have a clear shot at him before he could have boarded the ship… My arrow would have found his heart." Alix laughed quickly, then focused her attention back on Xena, "And then you're men storm the beaches… they block my path… and Caesar escapes. Which, it sounds as if you have quite the history of allowing Caesar to escape. It's almost like you're hesitant to kill him…. You are, obviously."

Xena's breathing became heavier; "Do as you wish when we return to the Empire, but we are helping you no longer." Xena turned to march away from the conversation, but felt Alix's strong hand clasp her shoulder and spin her around.

Alix's teeth clenched, "If by we, you mean, yourself and Gab-"

"That's exactly who I mean!" Xena shouted, causing Alixandriah to recoil.

"Xena…" Gabrielle called.

"No!" Xena snapped as she pointed a finger back at Gabrielle. "No… we've done enough. _This _has gone on _long _enough." Alix's eyes bounced back and forth from Xena to Gabrielle as she awaited Xena's next, chosen words. "Gabrielle, I thought I'd never ask you to choose between staying with me or loving someone else." Xena licked her lips quickly, "But at this point I have little choice." Xena turned back to Alix, "We're returning to the Empire with or without you." Xena quickly spun back to Gabrielle, "That goes for you as well." She lowered her eyes and hurriedly walked towards Argo.

Gabrielle's eyes became moist and she felt a burning sensation rise from the pit of her stomach and rush to her cheeks. A small aching feeling sprouted in her chest; she fought desperately to keep her emotions from showing. Alix approached her carefully.

"Don't worry about her and her ultimatum. We don't need her. We can flee to Gaul and we'll be safe there… we can forget all about this." She reached out and gently touched Gabrielle's arm. Gabrielle flinched, as it felt wrong and unfamiliar; it did nothing to sooth the stinging wound Xena had inflicted with such little effort.

"I don't want to go to Gaul, Alix." She barely spoke above a whisper.

Alix glanced over Gabrielle's shoulder and saw that Eden and Adalei were watching their interaction intently. She gazed back down at Gabrielle, "Then we'll return to the Empire." She leaned towards the bard and softly placed a kiss upon her head. Gabrielle's eyes closed during the contact and when they opened, Alix was walking away.

**(II)**

That evening's campfire did little to melt the iciness surrounding the five women. Xena had spoken very little since they left the safe house; Alix even less. Gabrielle found herself lost in her own thoughts as she tried to sort through the vast array of emotions she felt. She felt tangled; her heart gnarled. If there was one thing she was certain of, it was that she never wanted to lose Xena, even as a friend, but the thought of revoking a chance at a true romantic relationship with someone who cared for her deeply, was also not appetizing.

Alix had gone down to the river to fill her water skin. Xena followed behind her. Adalei and Eden both exchanged looks of fear that an altercation was at hand. Xena had no weapon with her, nor did she appear aggressive. She approached the other woman warily, with her hands neatly behind her back.

"What do you want, Xena?" Alix asked over her shoulder as she continued to let the cold water fill her jug. "I've little patience for your sharp tongue tonight."

"This is yours." Xena handed Alix a folded piece of parchment tied with a string. Wit that, Xena simply turned and headed back for the campsite.

Recognizing Adalei's handiwork, Alix knew the letter was from her. "Thank you." She mumbled to Xena. Not in the mood to read the undoubtedly heavy and harsh words, Alix shoved the letter into her waist pack, and then began walking towards the glow of the campfire.

"Have you thought of any names?" Eden asked as she poked at the fire with a long, skinny stick.

Adalei frowned at the question, "Of course not. I'm not even sure I'm going to keep it."

"What do you mean?" Eden's interest spiked, "You're not considering…"

"No, no…" Adalei quickly held up her hands, "I mean adoption." She explained.

"I thought the preferred term was kidnap?" Eden playfully countered causing Adalei to flash a hint of a smile. "Well, I'm sure you'd make a fine mother… there's really no sense in giving a child away if you're perfectly capable of parenting it yourself."

"There are several reasons why I should not have a child. I cannot provide a home, or protection. I'm on the run myself, how can I expect a child to survive?" Adalei sighed heavily, "I've thought about this both ways, and every time I reach the same conclusion. I'll be doing him or her a favor by not damning them to be my ball and chain."

"Adalei, you are _so _tiresomelybleak." Eden remarked. "First of all, I find it highly unlikely that Caesar is going to expend all of his soldiers, time, and effort into finding and killing just little old you. A change of appearance, name, and location within the Empire and you'll be safely able to escape his grasp; at least for a long while. Secondly, you're much more attractive when you smile and show a trace of happiness. You don't wear the oppressed, downtrodden, princess wardrobe very well." Eden smirked. "You're with child. You're supposed to be glowing, not fading way into your sorrows."

"It's not the simple…"

"It could be." Eden quickly retorted. "Why not? You could think of a new name for yourself as well as your baby." She smiled warmly. "Who will know? In fact, Caesar will be thrown more off guard by the fact you have a child… certainly being a mother would draw less suspicion of your true identity."

"I cannot keep this child just to use it for protection." Adalei defended.

"If it means protecting you both and allowing for an opportunity to start a new life and have a real home, I'd say it's worth it." Eden's eyebrows lifted. "I've always admired the name Leonidas. It's such a strong name, like the king of Sparta himself."

"And if it's a girl?" Adalei asked as she twirled a piece of grass with her fingers.

"That I do not know." Eden confessed. "Any names that you fancy?"

Adalei was quite for a few moments while she studied the question, "I've often thought that Alixandriah's name was beautiful, but that would not be a suitable title."

"Very true." Eden agreed. "Perhaps a variation of the name then? Or a combination?"

"I can't say I know of any." Adalei replied.

"Hmm… Alixandriah…" Eden tapped her foot while she thought, "What about Andriah? Or Riah?"

"Those are awfully similar, don't you think?"

"Well, that was sort of the point…" Eden joked. "How about we change the "h" to an "n"?"

"Rian..." Adalei said questioningly. "I've never heard of anyone having that name…"

"Perfect! A whole brand new name that belongs to no one else." Eden expressed happily.

"Now for yourself…" Eden began, "How about something more exotic like… Jezza or Selena."

Adalei laughed lightly, "I don't think so."

"Too seductive for your taste." Eden nodded. "Adale, perhaps?"

"Adelphia." Adalei smiled.

Eden laughed, "Lady Adelphia."

"Oh, right, how prestigious." Adalei laughed along with her new friend. A silence fell over them suddenly, "I've always liked being called Addie. It always sounds so endearing."

"Yes, but easily traceable to your real name."

"Shall we switch another letter, then?"

"Which one?"

Adalei thought cautiously, "What if we put an "m" at the beginning?"

"Maddie…" Eden connected. "That could work, except you look nothing like a Maddie and the name is actually quite boring…"

"Then, I shall just keep my old name and change my appearance." Adalei concluded.

"Fine…" Eden agreed. "You'd make a marvelous redhead, you know."

Adalei's playful demeanor quickly dropped. "What? What is it?" Eden asked. "Are you not a fan of red hair?"

"No, I find it very beautiful." Adalei smiled. "My mother had red curls."

"Oh…" Eden's face went blank with expression. "I-I didn't know…"

"That's alright." Adalei slowly stood to her feet. "Sometimes its good for me to be forced to remember her. I've a nasty habit of blocking her from memory." She glided towards her bedroll. Eden jumped up from her seat and followed. "She was a very good mother… much better than I could ever hope to be."

Eden wrapped herself in furs as she sat down next to Adalei, "It's very hard to lose a mother. I know."

"I lost so much more than that… I lost everything." Adalei stared off towards the direction of the campfire. "All because of Caesar."

"It appears I am the only one who has yet a reason to despise him." Eden observed

"Give him time and he'll give you a reason."

**(III)**

Xena had taken off on Argo to scout around their camp area, making sure that no predators lurked in any dark foliage. Eden and Adalei had fallen asleep a while ago, as their conversation died down and drifted into an early sleep. Gabrielle was finishing up editing her last scroll and was about to head to bed as well, when Alixandriah suddenly appeared beside her.

"Hi." Alix greeted softly. "May I sit?"

Gabrielle knew she would not be able to avoid this conversation for long. Ever since Xena's stinging remark at the safe house, Gabrielle had known Alix would address her feelings.

"Hi." Gabrielle repeated, her voice shaky in the cold winter air. "Sure."

"Do you miss the warm hut as much as I do?" Alix asked.

"I do, but I'm used to spending cold nights outside."

"With Xena?" Alix probed.

"Who else?" Gabrielle's eyes shifted and her head turned to face Alix. "Alix, what are we doing?"

Alixandriah inhaled deeply, "I've been loving you…" Alix replied easily, "But you've been tolerating me."

"No… I've enjoyed every moment with you." Gabrielle's hand reached over and took hold of Alix's. "But we're two pieces that don't fit together."

Alixandriah's eyes twitched at the statement and she swallowed heavily. "I don't necessarily agree. If we just had some time alone to ourselves… away from Xena, I could make you see that."

"I want to feel loved…" Gabrielle began, "I want to feel that I am connected to someone so deeply that I could never separate from them. I wanted them to want me, just as badly. That's what I wanted from Xena…."

"That's what you have in me." Alix defended.

"But I'm not connected to you Alix…" Gabrielle spoke the words tenderly. She felt tears begin to form in her eyes. "From the moment I met Xena, I wanted to be wit her. There was this connection to her, immediately… I felt linked… Like I had known her before and I had finally found her again. I had to be with her. I had to go wherever she went." Gabrielle paused for a moment before continuing, "I left my home in Potidaea so I could travel the world with Xena, but I've never felt like I no longer had a home. Home has always been wherever we made camp because we didn't need a building, we just needed each other."

Alix felt tears forming in her own eyes as well as she realized everything was about to come to an end, "Even though she doesn't want you the way I do… you still choose her."

"It's hard to explain, Alix. Think of me as being a ship that has sailed from her harbor. I may never again know the steadiness of docking, but I will always have my anchor to keep me still."

Alix had nothing to say in return. There was nothing she could say. She stared at Gabrielle for several seconds before slowly standing up and hurriedly walking away from the campsite, leaving Gabrielle to wonder if she'd only caused more problems for them all.


	13. XIII

_**A/N: Happy New Year, everyone! Sorry that I've been a while updating, you know how it is with holidays. This chapter is shorter than most that I write, but I feel like there is enough happening in it to make up for the shorter length. Enjoy. **_

**(I)**

Alix opened the letter slowly; she knew she had probably picked the worst time to read Adalei's undoubtedly bitter words, but she no longer cared. In her opinion it would be best to just get it over with so she could pack her belongings and leave; clearly, she had no place among the women.

_ Alixandriah, _

_ I hope this letter finds you well. I have heard nothing from you since I have arrived at the safe house, but sometimes no news is good news. I imagine you are not eager to hear from me, but I could not resist writing you this letter in hopes of convincing you to visit at least once before you leave the borderlands forever. I have had plenty of time left alone with my thoughts, and I have reached a decision that I hope you will approve. I realize that I am in no position to be a mother; furthermore, this child is nothing more than a reminder of how I betrayed you. Therefore, I understand that you'd never wish to see it or be a part of its life. I have decided it best to give it up for adoption after it is born; it will certainly be safer out of my hands than in them. That being the case, I have hoped that we could have the opportunity to talk face to face soon. I miss you so dreadfully much. I will never be able to express how truly sorry I am for hurting you. It was a foolish behavior that I wish I could erase from our past, but unfortunately, I have been forced to pay an ultimate price for my transgression. All I can hope for now is a better future, a future with you. _

_ I used to be unsure of the world you wanted us to live in, but now I see how perfect it truly was. I want nothing more than to live in that world with you, Alix. I can hardly bear the heartache I feel each night when I lay down to another restless sleep. I yearn for your arms around me, to feel the warmth of your body against mine; that is the safest feeling I have ever known… much safer than these four cold and lonely walls around me. I love you. I do not know how to stop. I believe we could move on from this tragedy, if you could find it in your own heart that you love me as well and could forgive me for my sin against our love. I know that you owe me nothing; I deserve nothing. Yet, my heart will not know the slightest moment of peace until I have sent you this apology. I will continue to pray for your well-being. May the Gods watch over us all. _

_ Love always, _

_ Adalei _

**(II)**

It was early morning when Alix approached the campsite. She had spent the night out in the nearby woods reflecting, planning, and debating on what to do. As Adalei's sleeping body came into view, she felt a tingling sensation explode throughout her chest. She hurried over to the bedroll and shook her shoulders lightly.

"Addie. Wake up."

Adalei's eyes fluttered open and she jumped in alarm from her bedroll.

"What is it? Are we near an attack?" Adalei's eyes darted back and forth.

Alix glanced around the campsite, making sure no one else was awake. "No. Come with me." Adalei was hesitant to react; thereby, prompting Alix to coax her further, "Please? I read your letter. I'd like to talk."

Adalei's eyes drifted down to her bedroll. She had forgotten about handing the letter over to Xena. Now, she wished she hadn't of, or at least that Xena had not delivered it.

"Alix, you do not have to explain. I am already well aware that you are with Gabrielle." Adalei refused to raise her eyes. The words tasted disgusting enough; she couldn't bear to look Alix in the face as she said them.

Alix sighed, "Please, Addie… will you come with me?" Alix held out her hand to the young woman. Adalei slowly lifted her own hand and placed it in Alix's. The initial contact caused Adalei's heart to beat faster. She slowly rose to her feet and allowed Alix to guide her away from the campsite. A few hundred feet away, Alix had cleared a new campsite, built a new fire, and had her bedroll spread out neatly. She encouraged Adalei to take a seat on the bedroll and offered her extra furs for warmth.

"What is all this?" Adalei asked as she looked around curiously. "Why did you build a new camp?"

"So we could be warm and comfortable while we talked." Alix replied as she grabbed a fur for herself and settled down beside Adalei. "I also gathered some berries if you'd like a light breakfast. I know that with the pregnancy, mornings can be a bit rough…"

Adalei was caught off guard to hear Alix reference the unborn child. It was even more surprising to hear a sincere concern in her tone.

"Thank you." Adalei took the berries and munched on them lightly as she anxiously awaited Alix's next words.

Alix flashed a quick smile and then cleared her throat, "Your letter… it was…"

"A mistake. I know." Adalei interrupted. "I asked Xena to deliver it before I knew that you and …" Adalei hesitated.

"It's no mistake. I'm sorry." Alix spat out, causing Adalei's eyes to snap into focus. "I'm sorry for the way I treated you. I'm sorry for making you feel like you were such a horrible person, or that you'd be a horrible mother. I'm very sorry."

"No, I'm sorry…" Adalei shook her head. "I can never take it back… instead, I carry a constant reminder…" Adalei placed her hand on her stomach, "A portent of heartache and misery."

"Don't say that."

"It's true…" Adalei murmured. "Even if I give her up, she'll still always be a haunting memory."

"_Her_?" Alix repeated, clearly intrigued that Adalei had selected a gender.

"I know it must sound silly, but I can feel that it's female." Adalei hinted at a smile, "A strong female… sometimes I think I feel her kicking, but isn't it too early for that?" Adalei's eyes glistened while she spoke, "But then I think, well, we have an early bloomer on our hands… a fast learner… I bet she'll be take to sword quickly, like her grandmother…"

Alix noticed the sudden change in Adalei's demeanor. She immediately lit up with a certain glow when she spoke about the baby forming her in belly. This was motherhood; the most beautiful and precious gift that can be given is life itself and Adalei possessed the power to give that gift. For a moment, Alix found herself teetering towards jealousy, but it was quickly replaced with a sense of pride.

"Or maybe she'll be like her mother, and let her words be her greatest weapon." Alix smirked after making the suggestion. Adalei smiled at the compliment, but it soon faded. "I'm not with Gabrielle." Alix stated calmly. "The truth is, I never really have been."

"I don't understand…."

"I didn't either at first, but she has a marvelous way of explaining things…" Alix repositioned herself, "She's not tied to me. She's tied to Xena."

"Well, that's quite obvious." Adalei nearly laughed.

"Xena has hard a time coming to terms with a few things… that woman is extraordinarily stubborn." Alix sighed, "But she isn't the only one."

"Xena and Gabrielle are meant for each other, Alix. I cannot fathom why you'd ever try to come in between them in the first place." Alix lowered her head. She didn't appear angry or bitter, just hurt and saddened.

Alix was quiet for several moments before replying. Clearly, she had taken the time to think about her answer, "I thought that Gabrielle and I could be each other's missing piece. She was aching for someone to love her… to be with her the way she truly desired…"

"She was aching for Xena." Adalei defended.

"I know that… but Xena wouldn't have her and you…" Alix paused, choosing carefully her next words. "You left me feeling that I asked too much of you. I wanted to be with a woman who also wanted to be with a woman… I don't believe it is that difficult to understand."

"Is your love truly that fluid, Alix? That it could be so easily transferred from one woman to another? Or did you ever really love me at all?"

Alix felt a wave of heat rush to her face. "Of course I loved you… I always worried you never truly loved me back."

"Do you love Gabrielle?"

"I love parts of her…" Alix confessed, "If that makes sense." She picked up a stick and poked at the fire. "I don't hold a candle to Xena, though."

"Well, who could?" Adalei replied as she sighed heavily.

"I thought that by being with Gabrielle, I'd make us both happy… give us what we each deserved. I realize now how selfish I've been. Deep down, I was only looking to make myself feel better…"

"Feel better of me, you mean?"

Alix nodded, "It is not easy to learn that your partner is carrying the child of a strange man."

"The day you sent me to the safe house, I felt my heart break in two." Adalei replied. "I would have done anything to fix this Alix, I was even prepared to give up my child, but after hearing that you've been trying to court Gabrielle this entire time…" Adalei paused, "I just don't know anymore…"

"I don't want you to give your child, Adalei…" Alixandriah stared deep into the other woman's eyes, holding her eye contact for several moments. "You will be an excellent mother."

Adalei solemnly shook hear head, "I try to wrap my mind around it… but the idea of trying to protect her from Caesar is so overwhelming, and yet, as each day passes I feel our bond strengthen and I want to keep her… I want to keep her, Alix." Adalei's eyes filled with tears, "But I don't know how I can."

Alixandriah immediately reached over and pulled Adalei into an embrace. "I will help you. Together, we will protect her."

Adalei sobbed into Alix's shoulder, "But you said…"

"Never mind what I said." Alix interrupted.

Adalei pulled away from the embrace and eyed Alixandriah carefully, "You'll truly help me raise this child?"

"I will." Alix earnestly admitted. "It was painful that you had to be with a man in order to prove your love for me, but if it has truly proven it, then I shall no longer question you. Let us no longer reference this innocent's life as a curse or haunting, but as a blessing." Alix smiled.

"Alix, that is beautiful…." Adalei smiled as tears continued to streak down her pale cheeks. "I knew the Gods would listen… I knew they would inspire you." She leaned forward and wrapped her arms around Alix's neck. She pulled away and allowed her lips to melt onto Alix's. The kiss was long and powerful. Alix felt a resurgence of energy and passion move throughout her body; a feeling she had not felt since she had last been with her lover.

"Addie…" Alix breathed as she pulled away from the kiss. "We cannot return to the Empire." Alix's eyes saddened.

Adalei lowered her gaze and whispered, "I know."

**(III)**

"I can't believe they left without saying goodbye." Eden folded her arms. "I mean really… they just sneak off in the early morning and not even tell anyone…"

Xena and Gabrielle exchanged a brief look. Xena sighed, "Alix was against returning to the Empire. She's most likely convinced Adalei that they'll be safer if they retreat farther north."

Eden huffed again, "Unbelievable! Gods, I knew Adalei was lovesick but I had no idea she was also delusional." Eden turned and faced Gabrielle who was sitting quietly on her bedroll, deep in thought. "She didn't tell you she was leaving?"

Gabrielle slowly glanced up from her seat, "No…" she replied in somber tone; then returned her attention to the fire.

"How terrible…" Eden shook her head. "Well, it appears it is now just the three of us." Eden remarked as she slapped her hands down towards her side.

"Eden, do you think you could tend the horses?" Xena asked. "We should head out soon if we expect to cover decent ground today."

"Well, at least they were unselfish enough to leave us two horses." Eden replied. "That's one positive spin on it…" She walked over and grabbed Argo and the young mare by the reigns. "I'll be back shortly." She announced before leaving.

"Hey…" Xena began as she slowly walked closer to the bard. "You okay?"

Gabrielle sighed lightly and closed her eyes, "I'm fine, but I'm going to worry about them…"

"They'll be all right." Xena confirmed as she leaned down next Gabrielle. "Alix knows how to survive… even if they are in the far north, she'll protect them."

"I am a bit surprised she didn't say goodbye…" Gabrielle flashed a hint of a smile. "But I guess it was easier this way." Gabrielle inhaled deeply, "She appeared from no where, and now she's vanished into thin air."

"That's always sort of her been her style." Xena agreed.

"Well, she's certainly left a long lasting memory in her place." Gabrielle slowly rose to her feet. "What can I do to help pack up camp?"

Xena rose to her feet as well, "Umm… just your bedroll… any supplies you see out… I'll take care of the fire." Xena shifted her weight to one foot. She cleared her throat, "So…."

Gabrielle waited several moments for the warrior to continue. "Yes?" Xena scratched at her temple with one finger. Clearly, she had something else on her mind. "What?" Gabrielle gently prodded.

"Look, I don't know how else to ask this, so I'm just going to ask it." Xena didn't behave this way often, but when she did, Gabrielle knew that it was something very important to her, something that she had spent a good deal of time thinking about or worrying about. Gabrielle prepared herself for the upcoming words. "She's gone because you ended it with her… right?"

Gabrielle lowered her gaze, "I imagine that had something to do with it."

"Well, that and the letter." Xena added.

"What letter?"

"Adalei wrote a letter for Alix. She asked me to deliver it to her. This was before she knew anything had changed… or that we'd all be leaving out together." Xena explained. "Insight tells me that the letter was full of apologies and heartaches… I figure that coupled with you breaking it off may justify her sudden disappearance… their sudden disappearance." She corrected.

Gabrielle nodded, "Hmm… That sounds logical." She replied.

"You don't seem that surprised…" Xena noted.

Gabrielle laughed lightly, "That they'd eventually end up back together?" Gabrielle raised an eyebrow. "Were you?"

"I'm surprised she was willing to let go of you." Xena admitted. She swallowed heavily.

"Well, if there's one thing I've learned, it's that you can't force something to exist just because you want it to…" Gabrielle paused. "But you shouldn't take for granted that what already is. Alixandriah and Adalei have a history, they'll have a future. They'll have a baby…" Gabrielle laughed. "Can you imagine Alix trying to help parent a child? I bet she'll actually be rather good at it… one of those hidden talents she doesn't even know she has until it comes time to use it."

"Some people are born with a natural motherly instinct…" Xena agreed. "I've always thought you had that quality…"

Gabrielle's eyes opened wider, "Children? That's something I haven't thought about in a long time… a very long time. It just doesn't seem very practical anymore…"

Xena shrugged, "Since when have we been known for being practical?"

Gabrielle's eyes narrowed at Xena's remark. "Wha-?"

"Xena! This horse of yours has quite the nasty attitude!" Eden yelled across the campsite as she continued to yank on Argo's reigns, trying desperately to get the beast to move.

Xena quickly sidestepped around Gabrielle, momentarily placing her hand on Gabrielle's shoulder as a quick gesture of an apology for running off in the middle of the conversation. "Eden, for Zeus' sake, don't pull on her like that… No wonder she's bucking up on you."

Gabrielle spun around quickly, just in time to see Argo rear up into the air and kick Eden to the ground. She covered her mouth with both hands before running over to assist the other woman while Xena calmed Argo.

"Gods, Eden, are you okay?" Gabrielle helped her friend back to her feet.

"Keep that monster away from me!" Eden shrieked.

"She's no monster." Xena quickly defended.

Gabrielle held up her hand silencing both women, "Let's just pack up camp. Eden can ride the mare."

Eden dusted herself off and mumbled a few choice words under her breath as she marched off to begin packing her bedroll.

"Remember the market we stopped at on the way up here?" Xena asked casually. "We'll need to stop by there again tomorrow. We should be able to buy enough of what we need to get us home."

Gabrielle's hand immediately went to her neck and grasped the necklace Alix has bought her at the very same market. She lifted her hands in attempt to unlatch it.

"No." Xena halted the younger blonde. "Leave it on."

"But…"

"Leave it on, Gabrielle. It can help protect us if we come into any danger."


	14. XIV

_A/N: Let's speed this up a little, eh? Oh, and for the sake of this fanfic, let's also pretend that Xena and Gabrielle didn't get crucified and also no Eve. It's all strictly fanfic from this point on. Also, Scythia is modern day Ukraine, and one of the places that is referenced when identifying the location of the Amazons. _

_Scythia: Two years later. _

**(I) **

"Oops…" Rian proclaimed innocently right after the string of beads snapped in two.

Adalei turned quickly, "Oh, Rian, look what you've done." Adalei gently scolded as she placed a hand on her hip. She glanced down at all the wooden beads that were now scattered messily across the floor. She advised Alix to not give the toddler the necklace for the very fear that something similar to this would happen, or worse, that Rian could get chocked on the small pieces. "I swear to Zeus, between you and Alix, sometimes it's a miracle that I get anything accomplished around here…"

"Addie!" Alix called from outside the cabin.

"See what I mean?" Adalei smiled as she scooped up her daughter and carried her outside to see what Alix needed. Adalei shielded her eyes from the late afternoon sun as she gazed towards the nearby creek at Alix who was on one knee tying a net around a box. "Alix, what are you doing?"

Alix proudly held up her contraption. "Look here." She pointed, "It's a fishing trap. I built the skeleton out of sticks, and then covered it with a net. See how the sticks funnel into the trap? That will allow the fish to easily enter, but it will be difficult for them to escape." Alix grinned mischievously. "I've even tied a stone to the bottom so that it's weighted and will sink under the water and stay in place."

"It doesn't look much different from other fish traps I've seen." Adalei replied casually, as she shifted Rian from one hip to the other. "My father built traps like that every season."

Alix sighed as she took a few steps towards her partner, "I miss the days when you were easily impressed."

Adalei laughed lightly, "Don't be foolish, Alix. You know that you need not to try to impress me. I'd be much happier if you'd just tell me what it is you needed, so I can go sweep up the hundred wooden beads that are scattered across our floor."

Alix glanced over at the toddler, "Did you break your necklace, pup?"

Rian clapped her hands together and shrugged, "Boke." She repeated. "It boke."

"It broke all on its own, did it?" Alix chuckled in amusement.

"She certainly has your knack for reasoning. I'm sure if she could verbalize it, she'd tell me the necklace broke not because she pulled on the string too hard, but because the string was too weak." Adalei explained.

"You're right. That sounds perfectly reasonable to me." Alix agreed. She focused her attention back on the child, "But just to be on the safe side, no more jewelry till you're a little older." She affectionately rubbed her hand across the back of Rian's head.

"What is it that you needed?" Alix asked again, keeping the subject at hand.

"Bait." Alix simply stated. "I have three more traps just like this one that I plan to set up in different parts of the creek. Do you think you could go to the market and buy some bait from one of the merchants? It will be nightfall soon, and I wanted to get these traps up before dark, but I still need to put some finishing touches on these others. I can't do it all before dark, but if I had someone's special help…." Alix's eyes softened as an added tool of manipulation.

"Alix, you know I just went to the market yesterday."

"Yes, but I didn't need the bait yesterday." Alix defended.

Realizing she was facing another type of string necklace logic, Adalei laughed to herself then quickly snatched Alix's coin purse from her waist belt. "Alright. I'll be back in a candle mark. But if I find even one bead on the floor when I return…" She pointed her finger at Alix.

Alix quickly held up her hands in defense, "You won't." Alix assured. "I'll finish my traps then sweep up every bead. I promise." She tacked on a smile for good measure.

Adalei returned the smile, "Good. Rian can stay with you. She's always such a fuss when she rides the horse." Adalei handed the toddler over into Alix's arms. "Mama will be back soon." She assured as she kissed Rian's forehead gently. She took a couple steps back and paused, "I expect you to be on your best behavior."

"Rian is always well behaved." Alixandriah smirked. "Aren't you?"

"I wasn't talking to Rian." Adalei teasingly called over her shoulder as she turned and walked away.

Half a candle mark later, Alix had finished constructing her traps and was now on her hands and knees searching for every last bead. "You see, pup," Alix spoke aloud as she reached under the table and scooped up a stray bed. "a clean home, is a happy home. Your mama works very hard to keep our home clean, and we should help her when we can."

"Mama." Rian mumbled.

Alix smiled and tossed the bead into a jar with the others, "Yes, Mama. Can you say, 'Mama is pretty?'" Rian stared at Alix for several moments without replying. "Come on. You have to at least try once. 'Mama is pretty.'"

"Mama…"

"Mama… what?" Alix encouraged as she leaned closer to Rian.

"Pwetty."

"Right. Okay, all together now…"

"Mama pwetty." Rian giggled. She was quite pleased with her short sentence, albeit a tiny bit improper.

"You've got it!" Alix praised. "See there, you can do anything if you set your mind to it." Alix's eye caught another bead under the stove, "Aaah.. It appears this little weasel thought he'd outsmart the fox." She reached under the stove and pulled out the bead. "I believe that's the last one." Alix dropped the bead into the jar and then placed it on a shelf. She turned back to face Rian who was sitting contently on a blanket on the floor. "We still have some time before mama returns. How about a bath, eh?"

"No bath." Rian objected.

"Ha-ha..." Alix laughed aloud, not expecting such a straightforward answer from the eighteen month old.. Not a day passed that Rian didn't do something that surprised Alix, almost always ending with her beaming with pride. "Sorry, pup, but I can't give you this one. Remember, a clean home is a happy home. A clean little girl is a happy little girl." Alix scooped the toddler up into her arms, "Off we go. I'll heat up some water for your tub."

Within a few minutes Rian stopped protesting her bath. She didn't care much for the water, but enjoyed the one on one interaction with Alix. It was worth a little soapy water to get undivided attention from one of her most favorite people. At almost the exact moment Alix changed Rian into her nightshirt, the cabin door opened and Adalei appeared with a box of bait in hand. She was surprised to see the floor spotless and Rian bathed and in her nightclothes.

"Mama!" Rian exclaimed as she reached up for the woman. Alix took the bait so that Adalei's hands would be free to pick up the child.

"Someone smells nice and clean." Adalei replied. "Wish I could say the same for myself."

"You should warm yourself some water. I'll bait my traps and then I can fix dinner." Alix suggested.

"You're being awfully pleasant this evening."

"Nonsense." Alix remarked. "I'm pleasant every evening." She added as she exited the cabin.

"Well, I won't pass up the opportunity for a warm bath and a hot meal."

"Bath…" Rain repeated. "Mama bath."

"Yes. Mama bath." Adalei smiled.

"Mama pwetty." Rian giggled.

Adalei felt a wave of heat rush to her face and knew that she was blushing, "Alix…" She whispered under her breath, knowing Alixandriah was behind the gesture. "Not as pretty as you, sweetheart." Adalei replied with a warm smile. "Come on, let's put you in your pen so you can play for a bit before dinner."

**(II)**

After Adalei had finished with her bath, she dried herself off and changed into her most comfortable sheath. She then walked over by the hearth to smell the delicious aroma of the roasting lamb. The meat was being cooked slowly, so that it became tender enough to practically fall off the bone. This was one of Adalei's favorite meals. Alix stood over the hearth, carefully making sure that nothing cooked for too long, especially the bread. That was a mistake she had made all too often, and there was nothing quite as unsatisfying as burnt, rock hard, bread.

"Our daughter seems to think I am pretty." Adalei stated simply, as she wrapped her arms around Alix's waist and peaked around to gaze into the fire.

Alix turned the lamb slowly on the spit, but allowed a smile to flash across her face, "She's very observant."

"Very." Adalei agreed. She tightened her grip on Alix's waist. "Thank you… for all of this."

Alix released herself from Adalei's grasp so that she could turn to face the slightly shorter woman, "Thank you for riding all the way to the market just for some bait."

"I actually enjoyed the trip. It gave me some time to think." Adalei twirled around and landed in a nearby chair. "We've been in Amazon country for the last two years and it's been wonderful, but we're so alone out here. I don't mind it much myself, but I worry about Rian. She has no other children to play with. We're so isolated here. There's no one for miles."

Alix quickly saw where the conversation was leading, "Addie, we're safe here. Rian will have plenty to do when she gets a little older. I can take her hunting and fishing… we could get a domesticated pet…"

"But interaction with other children is important for a child."

"We could take her to visit the Amazon children sometime."

Adalei sighed heavily, "Alix…"

"You really want to risk moving back into the Empire?"

"I want to be a part of a community again. I want to have friends… I want Rian to have friends. I want to be able to go to plays… and concerts… I want our daughter to have access to all the classic works. She needs culture, Alix."

"Culture." Alix repeated. The word tasted a little sour in her mouth.

"And when she's older, we'll take her to visit Gaul and Britannia so that she can truly understand where she comes from."

Alix was flattered that Adalei included Gaul in her plans, but it didn't seem as important to Alix as it once did. "Addie, I just want you both to be safe."

"We will be. I've heard rumors that Caesar is dead."

"You heard this at the market?" Alix asked suspiciously.

"Yes." Adalei replied. "I overheard a couple of merchants discussing their trading routes and one of them mentioned that the new Caesar, Augustus rules Rome now."

"And what makes you think this new Caesar is not as vengeful as the old?"

"I don't know it." Adalei admitted, "But if there was ever a hopeful chance of returning to the Empire, this is it. Please, Alix. Won't you at least consider it?"

Alix paused briefly, allowing herself a few moments to respond. As she was about to open her mouth and reply, she suddenly smelled the burning bread behind her, "Damn it!" Alix shouted as she spun around quickly and jerked open the oven door. She promptly pulled out the burning bread and dropped the hot pan on a nearby table, causing a loud bang. The loaf was black as coal and completely unsalvageable. Startled by the sudden commotions and loud noises, Rain began crying from her playpen. Adalei hurried over to sooth the frightened child. Alix removed the lamb from the spit and set it on the stove to cool. She glanced over at Adalei who was rocking Rian gently in her arms. Slowly the crying faded to a whimper. "I'm sorry, pup." Alix expressed sincerely as she carefully crossed the room and placed her hand on Rian's back. "

"It's all right, Alix." Adalei reassured. "She's just tired and hungry."

"I think we all are." Alix agreed. "At least we have some fresh vegetables to eat with the lamb."

"With any luck, we'll have fresh fish tomorrow evening." Adalei smirked as she handed Rian over to Alix and began preparing plates of food for each of them. Rian wrapped her arms around Alix's neck and laid her head on her shoulder. Alix appreciated the gesture and slowly began patting Rian's back. Adalei caught this tender moment out of the corner of her eye. "She's always so content with you." Adalei proudly noted. "You should hold her more often."

After dinner, Rian fell asleep quickly. Adalei cleaned up the table, while Alix took a quick bath and soon both women were comfortably relaxing in their bed. They both lay on their back, gazing up at the ceiling. They stayed in this position for several minutes before Alix finally broke the silence.

"It's nice to sleep in a real bed instead of the ground… but the view isn't as eye catching." Alix folded her arms behind her head. "It will take weeks to get back to Greece. Do you think Rian would be okay on such a long trip?"

Adalei turned over on her side so that she was facing her lover, "I think she'd be cranky at first… but she'd adjust."

"We would need supplies… I haven't earned any extra coin in a while."

"Well, if we sell the cabin…"

"Sell?" Alix rose up in the bed, "Addie, I have no intentions of selling this cabin."

A perplexed look crossed Adalei's face, "But well have no use for it."

"We may need this cabin again some day. Until then, we can rent it to one of the merchants at the market. He can use it for storage in return for upkeep."

"Alix, it's so far out of the way."

"Far enough to be safe." Alix countered. "Don't worry, I can earn the extra coin in a week or two. We'll have to pack light though; our wagon isn't very big or sturdy. I'd be surprised if it isn't in pieces by the time we get to the Empire."

"So, then we're going to do it? We're going to go back?" Adalei's tone heightened with excitement.

"If it's what will make you happy…" Alix reached out and held Adalei's hand. "If it's what's best for Rian…"

Adalei felt her heart swell, "What about you? Will you be happy?"

"Of course." Alix replied cheerfully. "It's not where that makes me happy, it's who. I could be in the middle of a desert or on the corner of the most crowded street in Athens, but as long as I'm with you, it doesn't matter. Home isn't always a place, sometimes it's a person."

Influenced by the romantic notion of it all, Adalei sailed on top of Alix, pinning her to the bed. Smiling mischievously, she lowered herself closer to Alix and whispered seductively in her ear, "Then what do you say to a welcome home party?"

**(III) **

_**Spartan countryside:**_

The comforting sounds of the crackling fire soothed Gabrielle after a long day. She rolled out her furs and collapsed carelessly onto her bedroll, thrilled that the day had finally come to an end. She and Xena had spent the several days patrolling and securing a large area of farmland that was being targeted by a few thugs and mercenaries. A couple of the homesteads were raided, and entire season's worth of crops destroyed. It was nothing short of an attempt to clear out the area of any profit or prosperity in order to force the owners to evacuate. "Land control." Xena called it. An attempt to devalue the land, or make it such a risk factor, that farmers would up and leave; thus, allowing anyone with ulterior plans to swoop in and take over.

Xena approached the campsite and gently kicked the heal of Gabrielle's foot, "Argo needs brushing… do you mind cooking the rabbit?"

Gabrielle sighed heavily as she sat up in her bedroll, "How much longer before they leave the farmlands? I'd give up already if I were them…" Gabrielle reluctantly grabbed the rabbit and began to prepare it for the spit. "I mean, we've bloodied their noses every day for the last week… Aside from the fact that it's becoming boring, I'm exhausted."

Xena reached into her pack for her brush and began grooming Argo, "This farmland is very valuable. It connects to the Avaya River. It's a primary trade route. It's worth a little extra effort to them."

"How many dinars are we getting paid again?" Gabrielle asked.

"Enough." Xena replied with a smirk. "Sound's like you're out of practice…"

"Out of breath is more like it." Gabrielle redefined. "I'm starting to despise the extra daily exercise."

Xena laughed lightly, "After this how about we take a vacation?"

Gabrielle's head snapped up from the fire pit, "A vacation? Really?"

"Sure." Xena replied as she continued to brush her horse, making sure Argo's coat was smooth and shiny. "We could head down to the island of Crete… spend some time there…"

"A vacation in Crete? As lovely as that sounds, we simply can't afford it." Gabrielle's attention fell back onto her cooking.

"We'll be able to after we're paid from this job." Xena reminded. She turned and faced Gabrielle. "I was able to save up some extra coin over winter as well."

"Xena, we shouldn't waste our pay on…"

"It's not a waste." Xena interrupted. "Time away will be good for us both."

The idea of spending some relaxing alone time with Xena was very alluring. Their relationship had grown in leaps and bounds since two winters before and Gabrielle knew it was only a matter of time before they took the next step. The idea alone excited Gabrielle immensely and she felt the sensation of the excitement begin at the pit of her stomach and rocket straight to her head. Satisfied with Argo's appearance, Xena tossed the brush back into her pack and stepped over beside Gabrielle. "Here, I'll finish that." She took over the cooking, allowing Gabrielle to return to her bedroll. Gabrielle folded her knees up to her chest and rested her chin on her arms. She watched the warrior, contently, for several minutes. Happy to be resting, happy to be in a peaceful setting with her most valued companion.

After dinner, Xena quickly cleaned up camp, while Gabrielle headed down to the nearby stream to wash off before bed. Xena followed closely behind. Gabrielle removed her boots and top, leaving on only her skirt, waded into the cool water. She cupped the water in her hands and rinsed it over her body. Xena, only in her leathers, was now in the stream as well.

"In Crete, there will be hot baths." Xena reminded as she stepped closer to the bard. She kneeled down into the water, and used her soap to wash her legs and arms.

"Mmm… that's enough to convince me." Gabrielle replied as she rubbed her neck, and kneeled closer to the water as well. "Hot baths are so wonderful for the aching body." Xena smirked, she had assumed Gabrielle was sore, but had neglected to admit it. She didn't want Xena to think she had gone soft. Minutes later, the couple was back camp, preparing for bed. Xena rolled out her bedroll evenly next to Gabrielle's, creating a larger bed for the two to lie in together, an idea that had become very popular over the last several weeks.

"They'll give up in a few days. They're due to run out of resources soon." Xena stated aloud in reference to the mercenaries. She threw a couple extra pieces of wood on the fire before retiring to the bedrolls.

"What's to stop them from coming back later? When they have more resources?" Gabrielle asked.

Xena shrugged, "That could very well happen. The farmers will have to pull together and come up with a defense strategy... something more long lasting and effective than the two of us out here bullying around these oafs."

Gabrielle laid face down on her bedroll, using her arms as a pillow. "I'll give you my share of today's dinars for a back rub."

"That desperate are you?" Xena teased, as she happily obliged to the bard's request. Slowly, Xena worked her hands over Gabrielle's muscles, beginning with her neck and working her way down to her waist. Gabrielle moaned softly every few seconds, allowing Xena to know which muscles needed the most attention. When Xena came upon a knot in the middle of Gabrielle's shoulders, the blonde arched up in response. "Oh, right there is good… really, really good."

"I can definitely feel it." Xena replied casually. "This knot has been here for days. You should have said something sooner."

"And have you think I've gone soft? Never." Gabrielle mumbled.

Xena grinned and continued to work out the knot. Within minutes she felt the pressure under the skin ease and the tightness unwind. She returned to her spot beside Gabrielle and lay down her back, starring carelessly up towards the sky.

Gabrielle inhaled deeply, and turned over on her back as well, "That was worth every dinar."

"Keep your dinars." Xena remarked, her eyes slowly drifting over. "Let's just say you owe me one."

"Deal." Gabrielle smiled as she closed her eyes.

"Do you ever wonder what it would be like to touch a star?" Xena asked. Her gaze refocused on the sky above.

"I don't think you can." Gabrielle replied. "They're much bigger than they look from down here. And I imagine they're very hot, like the sun."

"Do you think it's possible to even get that close? To even get that high off the ground?"

"For the Gods, perhaps. Why, you're not thinking of trying to reach one are you?" Gabrielle teased, her eyes still closed tightly.

Xena rolled over on her side, now facing the younger woman, "No, I have a fallen star right here within my grasp."

Gabrielle's eyes flickered open, "Xena, that's the sweetest thing I've ever heard you say." She smiled and moved closer to the warrior, allowing them to lie face to face, only inches a part. "You've been so thoughtful, lately. Thank you." She reached out and gently touched Xena's cheek. She admired the woman's beauty, now more than ever. Her piercing blue eyes, her tanned skinned, her dark hair… it was all breathtaking and perfect. She appreciated Xena, and everything about her, in a way no one else ever could.

Xena pulled the bard closer, enveloping her into arms. "Rest now." She whispered softly. "We have a full day of farm guarding tomorrow."

Gabrielle sighed contently and smiled, her head now rested perfectly on Xena's shoulder. This was how she hoped every night of the rest of her life would end.


	15. XV

_**The backwoods of Byzantium (Modern day Istanbul): **_

"For Zeus' sake… " Alix mumbled under her breath as she assessed the damage of the wagon wheel. "Isn't this just a boat ride in Tartarus? As if the wagon wasn't already in shambles, now we have a broken wheel."

"Alixandriah, I'm so sorry." Adalei hung her head. "It's so dark… I never saw the ditch."

Alix sighed heavily, "It's not your fault, Addie. We should have made camp earlier and not risked riding at night. Come on; help me push the wagon out of the ditch. We'll have to make camp here; at first light, I'll see what can be done about the wheel."

"It's badly broken." Adalei noted as she took her place behind the wagon. "Can you repair it?"

Alix grunted as she pushed on the wagon, "Most likely we'll have to leave the wagon." She huffed as she pushed forcefully, easing it over the ditch and guiding it onto the side of the road.

"Leave it?" Adalei's voice heightened. "How can we possibly leave it? Our entire life is in this wagon."

Alix wiped at her brow and exhaled, "We're near Byzantium. I can ride into the nearest market tomorrow and see if there is a blacksmith or anyone who could repair the wheel, but it's going to take time and coin that we don't have."

"Well, we'll just have to sacrifice. We'll stretch our supplies and coin." Adalei began unpacking the wagon to set up camp. "We can't just leave everything here for some group of thugs to plunder and enjoy. We've worked too hard for the little we have." Alix watched as the smaller woman ran briskly back and forth between the horse and the wagon, frantically unpacking camp. "Are you just going to stand there like a fool, or are you going to build a fire?"

Alix felt a stinging sensation shoot through her chest, "Adalei…"

"Alix, please…" Adalei held up her hand in protest, "I'm tired and hungry and it's been nightfall for well over a candle mark… And I know that Rian went to sleep with an empty belly tonight… All I want to do at this moment is rest. So either build a fire or do something useful."

Without speaking another word, Alix grabbed a small axe from her saddlebag and began chopping up nearby branches. A few silent minutes later, the warm, orange glow of the fire filled the tiny camp spot. Adalei gently picked up Rian from the back of the wagon and placed her tenderly on a bedroll by the fire; amazingly, she did not stir. Alix watched quietly as Adalei made up a separate bedroll by Rian and lay down beside the toddler. Alix fumbled through her pack until she found a bag of mixed nuts and berries. She slowly stepped towards Adalei and bent down beside her. She handed over the food as a peace offering. "It's too late to hunt, but these will hold you over till morning. I've heard the sounds of gushing water, so there must be a stream nearby. I'll set up one of my traps in the morning and hopefully we'll catch something by the afternoon."

"I can't eat knowing that she went to sleep without food." Adalei replied as she tossed the bag to the side of the bedroll.

"She'll eat a good meal tomorrow. I'll make sure of it." Alix's eyes batted back and forth. "From now on, we'll stop in plenty of time for you both to eat and rest… before nightfall."

Adalei felt a faint smile cross her lips, but it didn't last long. "We should get some sleep, Alix. Tomorrow will be a trying day." Adalei rolled over on her side facing Rian and the fire.

Alix nodded and lay down beside her partner. She extended her arm over Adalei's side and rested her hand on her stomach. "I love you." She whispered into Adalei's ear.

"I know." Adalei replied softly as her hand squeezed Alix's arm. "I love you as well."

_**Spartan Countryside: **_

"Six hundred dinars. I can't believe it!" Gabrielle's eyes sparkled as she held the coin purse. "When you said we were getting paid well, I never imagined this much. I don't know if I've ever held this much coin at once."

Xena smiled, "It's more than enough to visit Crete and then some..."

"You're serious? You really want to go?" Gabrielle's eyes shifted from the coin to the warrior.

"Yes…" Xena answered simply. "Don't you?"

"I do, but…" Gabrielle shook her head, "Xena, it just seems like there are so many other things we could spend this coin on…"

"Gabrielle, we deserve to relax just as much as anyone else." Xena reminded. "We can always earn more coin." Xena took the purse from Gabrielle's hands and tucked in neatly into her saddlebag. "You're usually in favor of a little squandering…"

"This isn't a little squandering…" Gabrielle countered, "This is a big squandering… six hundred dinars worth of squandering."

Xena sighed, "Well, if you don't want to go to Crete…"

"No." Gabrielle quickly interrupted. "No… I just… Let's try not to spend all of it while we're there?"

A laugh of amusement escaped Xena's lips, "Okay. We'll take the cheapest vacation possible."

Satisfied, Gabrielle smiled. "Good. Cheap is good." Now that she could avoid feeling guilty about spending their pay on a frivolous vacation, Gabrielle could focus on what the trip would do for her and Xena's intimacy level. There would certainly be plenty of perfect opportunities to "consummate" their relationship. Gabrielle's relationship with Alix, albeit short, had hindered her progression with Xena. Xena was not eager to jump into anything with Gabrielle so suddenly after Alix; it would have felt rushed and artificial to her. At times, she found herself still slightly bitter over Alix's infatuation with the bard, even if she played a role in it happening.

She was very good at keeping Gabrielle at a distance when she felt it was necessary, but that tough, warrior, exterior was cracking and Gabrielle knew it. In many ways, it was as if they had started over, but this time the rules of the game were different. Xena was now aware of Gabrielle's feelings and Gabrielle of Xena's. After dropping Eden off in Athens, they had traveled Greece for a bit allowing themselves time to reconnect. Eventually, things began to feel normal and a routine established again while a particularly warm comfortableness filled the space between them.

Their first real kiss had been breathtaking. Gabrielle remembered it fondly, unlike the awkward exchange they had shared several months before, this one was filled with pent up passion. It had been six months ago. They were camped outside a small village in Thessaly and Gabrielle had spent most of that evening writing in her scrolls and Xena had called it an early night as well. It wasn't often that Xena fell asleep before the bard, but on this specific evening slumber overtook the warrior quickly:

_Gabrielle was nearly finished editing her scrolls when she heard the faint whimpering of Xena's restless sleep. Her eyes lifted from the parchment to behold her companion tossing and turning recklessly. 'A nightmare' Gabrielle thought. 'Perhaps I should wake her? Or would that embarrass her?' While Gabrielle pondered what to do, Xena's nightmare suddenly turned more violent and soon she was thrashing around about her bedroll and mumbling incoherent phrases. Fearing she may hurt herself, Gabrielle quickly rushed to the warrior's side. _

"_Xena… wake up." Gabrielle reached out to touch the woman's shoulder, but her hand was snatched away forcefully. Suddenly, Xena jerked up from her bed, her breathing out of control and her eyes bulged. Sweat rolled down her cheeks as she desperately tried to gather herself. Gabrielle didn't dare move or speak. Xena's hand was wrapped tightly around the small bard's wrist, but Xena released her quickly. _

"_Gabrielle?" _

"_It's okay, Xena. You were dreaming." Gabrielle pulled her hand away slowly. _

_Xena glanced down at Gabrielle's arm; she had left a handprint around the slender wrist, "I'm so sorry." _

"_It's all right. It doesn't hurt." Gabrielle smiled. "I'll have to find a more creative way to wake you next time." _

"_I don't even know what I was dreaming about…" Xena replied distantly. Her heartbeat was fast, she felt tingly and uneasy. She stood up from her bedroll. _

"_Whatever it was, it upset you pretty badly." Gabrielle noted as she watched the warrior pace. "I'll put away my scrolls, I'm finished anyway, and I'll lay down with you." Gabrielle moved towards her supplies. _

"_I can't sleep… I feel…" _

"_You feel what?" Gabrielle asked when Xena didn't finish. _

"_I don't know… paranoid?" _

"_You're asking me?" Gabrielle chuckled. "Xena, it's okay. It's just a bad dream. We all have them." Gabrielle tossed her scrolls into her sack and tied it tightly. She spread her bedroll beside Xena's, connecting them together. "Come here… lay down." _

_Gabrielle's invitation was tempting, but Xena's skin was still crawling. She strived to remember what she had been dreaming. She felt like not remembering put her at a disadvantage. What if she was missing an important sign? What if she was supposed to figure something out through her dream, maybe a message? What if she went back to sleep and it happened again, but then what if she really hurt Gabrielle? What if… _

"_Xena…" Gabrielle's voice called again. "If you keep pacing like that, there will soon be no grass beneath your feet." _

_Xena glanced down, as if expecting to see a change of texture on the ground. She sighed heavily and then returned to her bedroll. She lay on her back for a while, staring towards the stars, she didn't speak nor close her eyes. _

"_Now, you're making me paranoid." Gabrielle joked. "Why are you so shaken up over a dream?" _

"_I used to have nightmares when I was a child…" Xena confessed. "Unfortunately, a lot of the bad stuff I dreamed about came true." _

"_You have the gift of prophecy?" Gabrielle asked eagerly as she sat up on one elbow. _

_ "Perhaps I had it back then…" Xena replied, "Not anymore. Now, I just look for signs… messages…" _

_ "Messages from who?" Gabrielle's curiosity was peaking._

_ "The Gods." _

_ "The Gods send you messages in your dreams?" _

_ "Sometimes… It's not something I can easily explain, but it exists nonetheless. When I can't remember the dream, it worries me that I have missed a sign." _

_ Gabrielle reached over and took Xena's hand, "If the Gods have a sign or message for you, Xena, you'll know it." She smiled warmly. "Relax." She leaned over and kissed Xena gently on the forehead. As she attempted to pull away from the contact, Xena cupped her hand around Gabrielle's neck and pulled her back down towards her. Their lips meet briefly at first, barely touching, but then crashed into each other passionately. Both women were breathless when they finally released each other. Gabrielle's heart and mind were racing as she collapsed onto the bedroll. Xena felt a wave of heat rush to her face as well, she had resisted long enough the temptation to kiss the blonde, but the sudden urge to do so had practically came out of nowhere. _

"Gabrielle, did you hear what I said?" Xena repeated, this time with a hint of agitation.

"Hm?" Gabrielle snapped out of her daydream, "I'm sorry?"

"I asked you to brush down Argo while I gather firewood for the night…" Xena stood above the bard with her hands on her hips, "What in Tartarus were you thinking about?"

Gabrielle smiled innocently, "Nothing… just ideas for a story."

"Must be a good story." Xena mumbled as she took off to gather firewood.

"Mmm… One of the best ever told." Gabrielle whispered to herself and smiled as she grabbed Argo's brush.


	16. XVI

**(I)**

"Twenty-five dinars? That's an inflated price and you know it." Alix spat.

The merchant huffed, "Madam, it's ten dinars for the wagon wheel and fifteen if you want my blacksmith to come all the way out to your campsite and fix your wagon. It's a fair price and you know it."

Alix squinted in annoyance, "And what if I decide to just fix the wheel myself?"

"Well, I would hope you have the proper tools and knowledge for that." The merchant simply replied. "It is, of course, your decision."

Alix grunted, "Look, pal, my entire wagon isn't worth twenty-five dinars."

"That's not my problem."

"Aren't you people supposed to want to make money?" Alix's calm demeanor was quickly fading as she struggled to keep negotiating, which had never been one of her strong suits, "How about five dinars for the wheel and ten for the labor?"

"No." The merchant folded his arms. "I have quoted you my price."

Alix sighed heavily and pulled out her coin purse. She counted eighteen dinars. Realizing she didn't even have enough to cater to the merchant's overpriced request, she turned and marched out of the market place.

"My friend! My friend!" A slender, olive skinned, man waved his arm to get Alix's attention. Alix paused for a moment and stared at the stranger, unsure if she wanted to approach the man. She was left little choice when he approached her. "You are in need of help?" He asked eagerly.

Alix eyed the man quickly and replied, "Perhaps."

"I hear your conversation. Your wagon, it is broken?" He smiled.

"You often listen in on other people's business?" Alix questioned, she slowly placed her hand on the handle of her dagger, not as a threat, but to ensure he was aware of its presence.

"No, no, no!" He held up his hands quickly, "I accidentally overhear. The merchant, he is very loud."

"What do you want?" Alix asked casually. "I'm very busy."

"We can trade." The man appeared very pleased with his request.

"Trade what?" Alix's patience grew thinner.

"My sister, and her children, they are with me. We are traveling to Greece. We have a wagon, but we are unfamiliar with the land and I am not skilled with a weapon." The man glanced at Alix's sheathed sword. "You are?"

"Protection?" Alix asked. "You'll let me travel with you in exchange for protection?"

"Yes!" The man shook his head and exclaimed with excitement. "We can help each other."

"I appreciate your offer, but I'm not alone. I have a family with me as well." Alix turned to leave.

"A family? That is lovely!" The man quickly interjected. "Our wagon, it is large."

Alix turned back and faced the man once more, "What is your name?"

"Iraj."

"Alixandriah."

"It is very nice to meet you." The man bowed his head. "My sister, she is over there." He pointed across the street to a tiny woman holding a small child in one arm and holding the hand of an older boy who stood beside her. "Sahar!" he called and motioned for the woman to come near.

Sahar cautiously made her away across the street, when she stepped closer to Alix she lowered her head and did not make eye contact. The little boy at her side hid behind his mother's robes. The small girl in her arms barely made a sound.

"Hello." Alix greeted warmly, attempting to not appear frightening.

"Sahar, say hello." The man encouraged. "It is okay. She is a friend."

"Hello." The woman spoke softly but her eyes did not rise.

"I am sorry. My sister is mourning. She lost her husband in war." Iraj put his hand on the small boy's head, "He was a brave man."

Alix wasn't fond of the idea of traveling with strangers, but they certainly seemed harmless enough; nothing she couldn't handle, anyway. Her options at the moment were limited.

"Which part of Greece are you headed to?" Alix inquired.

"Crete." Iraj replied. "We have family there."

"Crete is an island. That will require a ship."

Iraj nodded, "My uncle, he made arrangements, but I do not know the way." Iraj reached into a small sack and pulled out a scroll. He handed it to Alix; she read over the directions, which included that a ship would be waiting for them in Crotona Port.

"I do not know of this port." Alix replied.

"Neither do I." Iraj paused.

Alix thought for several moments before handing the scroll back to Iraj. "If you can find us a map, I will see that you and your family get to Crete."

Iraj smiled widely. "Of course! Of course! I will find a map!" he exclaimed with joy. "I will meet you here, tomorrow morning, we leave for Crete!"

"All right." Alix agreed and shook the man's hand.

**(II)**

Gabrielle allowed herself to wander into daydreams as she rode comfortably infront of Xena, the warrior's arms engulfing her perfectly. She had always preferred walking to their destination, but these days, with this new riding style, she found herself very content upon the horse. Xena rode at a steady pace as they took their time traveling the countryside. The relaxed state was refreshing and well deserved.

"Have you ever been to Crete?" Xena asked casually, breaking the bard from her dreams.

Gabrielle smiled before replying, "Once."

Xena was surprised to hear of a past visit, "You must have been a child." She concluded.

"It was my seventh year." Gabrielle confirmed. "My sister Lila was only in her fourth year. She used to say she could remember everything too, but I knew she didn't. I barely remembered the visit at all after a few years. Lila would ask me to tell her stories about the trip before we fell asleep. Sometimes, I'd have to make parts up because I would forget. I think she knew that, but she didn't mind. She just wanted to hear the story." Gabrielle's heart ached for a moment from the memory of her sister.

"What do you remember now?" Xena's question was gentle and sincere.

Gabrielle closed her eyes, "The smells." She opened her eyes, "The island was full of different perfumes, flowers, foods…" Gabrielle paused. "It was so relaxing there; the beaches were sandy and the skies were blue. We only stayed for a few days, long enough for my father to make a business arrangement for our farm. It was one of the few times I left Potidaea and traveled. Gods, even then I knew the small village life wasn't for me."

"Good thing I came along." Xena teased. "Who knows who or what you may have run off with?"

Gabrielle laughed lightly, and then turned slightly to face the warrior. "I wouldn't have run off with just anyone." She replied sweetly.

"Why me?" Xena inquired innocently.

Gabrielle smiled, "Because you were different."

"Different?"

"Well, there were lots of reasons." Gabrielle replied, as she turned back around and faced the road. "You had so many qualities that I admired."

"Such as?" Xena encouraged.

It was rare for Xena to press a conversation. It was even more rare for Gabrielle to suppress one. She suddenly found herself feeling awkward infront of the warrior as she recalled, even back then, the obvious affection she felt. "You were strong and independent." Gabrielle finally answered. "Brave." She added. "I had never seen that before in a woman. Part of me wished to be like you, but even more so, I just wanted to be with you." Xena didn't reply. The silence made Gabrielle uncomfortable, so she continued, "And you were so beautiful. I almost wondered if you were one of the Gods." Gabrielle's voice lowered into a soft whisper, "I couldn't just let you leave without me. I would have followed you for months if that's what it took."

Xena's arms tightened around the bard, and she pulled the smaller woman closer to her. Gabrielle leaned against Xena's chest. She felt the warmth and tenderness of Xena's lips press against her head. It set her body on fire and it was if she melted into the warrior's embrace. "I just wanted to protect you." Xena said softly. "That's all I've ever wanted, your safety."

Gabrielle put her hand on Xena's arm and squeezed it tightly; "There isn't a safer place in the world than in your arms."

**(III)**

"Well, I think it's the best alternative." Adalei replied casually. "At least we'll have some company for the rest of the trip." She carefully turned the fish in the frying pan. "And Crete could be the safest place for a fresh start. It'll be nice to have children around for Rian."

Alix stared deeply into the fire. She tried not to think of the bad things that could happen upon returning to the Empire. Addie was right, Crete could be detached enough to hide them but still offer benefits of the Empire's culture and amenities.

"In the morning, I'll go to town to meet Iraj. You stay here with Rian and I'll come back for you and our supplies."

Morning came quickly and Alix awoke with ease. She had trained herself well, at the first speck of daylight, Alix's biological clock alarmed. She was careful to not wake Adalei and Rian, who often enjoyed sleeping in a little longer. She stood to her feet and stretched. The cool crisp air was refreshing and the idea of moving onward was inspiring. She wanted to keep Rian and Adalei off the road and out of the wilderness as much as possible. The broken wagon wheel was a small set back that had delayed their travels, but not deterred them.

Briefly, she considered waking Adalei to tell her goodbye, but then decided against it. She mounted her horse and quietly exited the campsite. Half a candle mark later she was standing in town waiting for Iraj. He showed up as promised, with a map and his wagon. He was eager to travel, but then, so was Alix. They wasted no time in heading towards the campsite. Alix was pleased with the size of the wagon; there would be room for Adalei and Rian and their supplies. It seemed to be a true gift from the Gods. Alix was thankful, but still on guard. It was a habit she had formed over the last two years.

As they rode up to the campsite, Rian was happily running around the bedrolls laughing and playing with one of her toys. The sight warmed Alix's heart and she thanked the Gods once more that they would be on their way this morning. Adalei had begun packing up camp and was nearly finished when she heard the wagon coming forward.

"Rian, come here, sweetheart." Adalei called, in fear she may run out into their way.

"Momma!" Rian exclaimed, "Look!" she pointed.

Adalei smiled and scooped up her daughter. Rian wrapped her arms around her mother's neck and watched wide eyed as Alix and the horses came closer.

Alix dismounted her steed and stepped towards Adalei. Rian reached out for the warrior. Alix happily accepted the invitation, "Good morning, pup." She greeted tenderly.

"Orses." Rian spoke with confidence as she gazed passed Alix's shoulder.

Alix turned back and looked then laughed lightly, "Yes, pup. Horses."

Suddenly Rian's eyes landed on the other small toddler who peaked her head out of the wagon. It was the first time Rian had seen another person her size. She instantly lit up with excitement and curiosity.

"Hello, I'm Adalei." Adalei greeted the travelers. She stepped forward gently to better acquaint herself with her new friends. "Thank you so much for your help."

Iraj jumped down from the wagon and extended his hand, "No, we are thankful." He replied. "Alixandriah is very kind."

"That's how we feel about you." Adalei smiled. "It seems as if the Gods brought us together."

Iraj laughed, "Indeed." He glanced over at the broken wagon. "I am surprised you made it this far." He immediately began clearing room in his wagon for his new friends' supplies.

"It's nice to meet you." Adalei greeted as she looked up at Sahar. "I have a daughter about the same age as yours." She looked back at Rian who was eyeballing the strangers intensely. Adalei giggled, "It seems she is eager to meet you."

Sahar smiled. She was touched by the woman's warmth and was delighted to see that she was a mother as well. Her guard lowered, "I am Sahar. This is my son, Amir, and my daughter, Malakeh."

"Their names mean King and Queen." Iraj interjected as he grabbed a large crate off Alix's wagon. "My brother named them. He wanted them to be proud… strong."

"I'm sure they will be." Adalei replied humbly.

"They already are." Sahar doted. She called for Amir to step out of the wagon, "Amir, help your uncle." The small boy immediately obeyed his mother.

"No, pup, you can't eat that." Alix gingerly reached down and took a bug out of Rian's hand. "I can't wait till the "everything is potential food" phase passes." She mumbled. "Did Momma forget to feed you this morning?"

"Of course, I fed her." Adalei defended playfully as she walked back towards her family. "She ate an entire bowl of berries and drank a cup of milk."

"She was about toe at dessert." Alix teased tossing the bug back into the surrounding bushes.

"Well, she didn't learn bug eating from me." Adalei picked up the child and placed her on her hip. "So, that leaves you."

Alix laughed heartedly, "I don't eat bugs."

"I've seen you eat quite a few 'questionable' things." Adalei replied in a tone that appeared to be good-humored, but also serious.

"Never a bug." Alix objected.

"It's all right, darling." Alix smirked as she twirled around and walked back towards the wagon to introduce the two toddlers?

"I don't eat bugs." Alix stated again, this time a little louder so that everyone could hear. No one seemed to notice; no one replied. "I don't." she emphasized. She grabbed the last crate off the wagon and loaded it onto Iraj's.

"Ready, friend?" Iraj asked as he clasped his hand onto Alix's shoulder.

"Ready." Alix replied throwing a bucket of water onto the fire's embers. "Let's go."


End file.
